There are Dreams that Cannot Be
by Adrianna-Rossetti
Summary: Set 4 years after Paris. After seeing Andrea in Les Misérables, Miranda realizes that she needs the alluring brunette in her life once again. But everything is not hearts and rainbows. Andrea has a secret that might just ruin everything.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Don't own it.**

**A/N: Thanks for reading! Please review. :) Inspired by watching the trailer for Les Misérables!**

It was ridiculous. Sunglasses weren't made to be worn indoors, yet a pair of black Prada shades were present in the darkened theater. The absurd item belonged to Miranda Priestly, who was fervently trying to control her tears when she saw _her_ Andrea on the large movie screen, barely a size 0 and passionately singing the infamous song, _"I Dreamed a Dream."_ Andrea's bewitching voice resonated through the theater as her face contorted in an awful sadness. Her expressive brown eyes spoke of so much pain and sorrow, and Miranda felt her own heart ache, which brought forth more tears. Thank god for Prada.

When Fatine's long brown locks fell to the ground, Miranda had to restrain herself considerably from gasping loudly. Andrea's hair was one of her loveliest features, and now it was gone.

Miranda watched the rest of the movie in rapt silence, occasionally bringing her hand up to her mouth to keep from crying out. During Fantine's death, the song Andrea sang was heart-wrenching. When her hallucinations caused her to see her child, Cosette, Miranda could hardly suppress the sobs that overtook her body and the anger that made her clench her hands into fists. Of course she knew it was just acting, but seeing Andrea actually dying made her own heart feel like a thousand knives had pierced through it. She was overtaken with nerves and she could feel her palms sweating. Ridiculous. Miranda Priestly _never_ sweated. Damn that girl.

She took a moment to compose herself, and then stood up and exited swiftly. Nobody in the theater noticed she was there, since she had quietly entered from the back and sat in the very last row. Miranda exited the cinema with her head bowed low and her coat wrapped tightly around herself. She ignored the paparazzi that were calling her name, and slipped elegantly into the Mercedes where Roy was faithfully waiting for her.

After Roy had pulled away from the curb, Miranda allowed the guilt to flood her system. Seeing Andrea die on-screen made her feel ashamed and regretful-not to mention scared. Miranda felt like she had truly lost Andrea once more after seeing her lifeless body in the movie. It was like Paris four years ago all over again. Her affections for Andrea had started to shape into something more serious, but before she could act upon those wishes, Andrea had broken her heart by leaving her. After the best assistant she ever had (and possibly the woman of her dreams) walked out of her life, her anger clouded her judgment, and she blacklisted the girl from every single publishing company in New York. Instead of getting angry and sending hate mail or some such thing like that, Andrea had sent a letter where she apologized, and even _thanked _Miranda for the opportunity to work for such a prestigious company. She had gone so far as to justifying Miranda's choice to blacklist her, writing that she would have done the same thing if she were in Miranda's position. Miranda felt awful.

Four years had been a long time. Miranda hadn't spoken or contacted her during that duration. Apparently since Andrea couldn't write, she became an actress. And what an actress she was. Les Misérables was her first movie, and Miranda had seen it simply because she was curious after seeing the trailer. She remembered the shock she felt when she gazed into those familiar brown eyes again on her television screen. Cassidy and Caroline noticed her too, as they were the ones who prodded a hesitant Miranda to go and see it. "But Mom! She was your favorite assistant! You should support her!" were Caroline's exact words. After little consideration, Miranda had decided to go.

The reviews for the movie so far had been wonderful. They praised Andrea's performance, calling it 'poignant' and 'a wonderful start for an uprising actress.' Miranda was proud of her secret love, but she wished so badly that she could be there, sharing Andrea's successes and achievements. She wanted to be Andrea's other half-the person that Andrea would-and could confide in.

Miranda let a small smile play on her lips as she thought about her. Beautiful, caring, and extremely sweet were adjectives that popped in her mind when she thought about Andrea Sachs. She thought about the movie that portrayed Andrea as a prostitute. The girl had definitely matured and grown up a lot since her days at Runway.

"Ma'am," Roy cleared his throat, "we're here."

Startled, Miranda looked to her right where she found Roy patiently holding the door open for her. They were already at the townhouse, and Roy was standing in the freezing cold waiting on her. Flustered, she stepped out of the car quickly and nodded to Roy once before turning and walking into her home.

She hung her coat up in the closet and headed up the stairs. Pausing at Caroline's bedroom, she rested her hand on the doorframe and poked her head in.

"Hey Mom," the teenage girl said as she flipped through the latest issue of _People_. "How was the movie?"

"Hello Caroline," Miranda responded, "it was…acceptable."

"Was Andrea good in it?" Caroline asked.

"Yes," Miranda smiled her real smile. "She was very good in it."

Caroline looked up and noticed her mother's almost…_lovesick_ expression. "_How_ good?" Caroline smirked when she saw her mom tense up.

"Very," Miranda replied haughtily, embarrassed that Caroline had caught her dreamy expression.

"It's cool Mom. Andrea was always pretty awesome," a small smile appeared on Caroline's face as she turned her head back into the celebrity world of gossip.

Not knowing what to say, Miranda nodded even though Caroline didn't see it, and turned to visit her other daughter. Knocking gently on the door across from Caroline's bedroom, she opened the door when a 'come in' rang out. Caroline was on her laptop, writing a school paper. She looked up at her mom.

"Hey Mom," Cassidy greeted her in the same manner as Caroline did. "Did you like the movie?"

"Yes. It was good," Miranda said, firmly keeping her face void of any attraction that showed her feelings towards Andrea.

"That's good," Cassidy smiled. "I'm glad you liked it. The paparazzi didn't get you too hard, did they?"

"No, but they probably got some good shots of my coat since I hid my face in it," Miranda smiled back.

"Good job Mom!" Cassidy laughed.

"Thank you Cassidy," Miranda chuckled back.

"Well I think I'm going to finish this last paragraph and then go to bed," Cassidy yawned. "I'm beat."

"I'm proud of you," Miranda praised. "Good night."

"Good night Mom. Sweet dreams!"

"You too."

Miranda shut the door behind her after she gave Cassidy a hug.

"Hey Mom," she heard Caroline call.

"Yes Caroline?" she walked back to her room.

"Andrea's in _People_!" Caroline said excitedly, pointing to a picture where Andrea was walking down the street, her face shyly sporting a small smile. "She like, shaved her head! All of her hair is like, gone!"

"Caroline, how many times have I told you not to use the word 'like' in your vocabulary? It sounds bad," Miranda scolded gently. "And Andrea is not bald, she cut it into a pixie. She had to for Les Misérables. It looks very becoming on her."

At her last statement, Caroline's eyebrow raised. "Yeah, she looks really pretty."

"Mmm," Miranda murmured, her eyes tracing over Andrea's profile.

"Hey Mom," Caroline broke her study.

"What?"

"If you wanted to hang out with Andrea, that would be cool with me," Caroline said carefully, not wanting to insult or imply anything that would aggravate her. "And I'm sure Cassidy would be okay with it too. It would be nice to have a new face around the house."

"Oh, well," Miranda said, looking flustered. "Thank you?" She phrased it as a question because she didn't know what Caroline was implying.

"Yup, well, good night Mom!" Caroline stood up from her bed and threw her arms around the fashion icon, giving her a quick peck on the cheek. "Here, you can keep the magazine."

She practically shoved _People_ in Miranda's hands and pushed her out the door. Miranda was left standing in the darkened hallway and wondering what the hell just happened. Shaking her head fondly at Caroline's actions, she made her way to her own bedroom and tossed the magazine on her bed. She quickly stripped out of her expensive clothes and dressed in her nightgown. Tying her favorite dark blue robe around her, she picked up the magazine where she had discarded it earlier, and opened it to where Caroline had so thoughtfully folded the corner of the page down.

Sinking onto her bed, her eyes hungrily roamed over the figure she had come to miss terribly. Andrea was wearing plain black jeans, Steve Madden wedges, and a brand-less billowy blouse, something Miranda usually would have deemed a disgrace to the fashion world, but on Andrea, it looked beautiful. Of course, she would look good in anything she wore. Andrea would look gorgeous in a potato sack.

Miranda traced her fingertips over Andrea's face, aching to do the same with the real thing. Sighing, Miranda mulled over Caroline's words. Her 13-year-old daughter was more insightful than she was at that age. She wouldn't have known if her mother was in love with someone just by looking at her. Based on Caroline's statements, her, nor Cassidy, would be opposed to her possibly dating Andrea. Just thinking about the possibility of finally getting to hold Andrea and touch her made Miranda tingle with excitement.

_But,_ a little voice in her mind whispered,_ what if Andrea doesn't share your feelings? She's only 28. You're 54. She's still so young. She has so many opportunities for lovers in her life. What if she isn't even attracted to you? What if she's not even a lesbian? What if she opposes gay people? What if-_

"Shut up," Miranda said out loud. "You're never going to get anywhere with her if you keep being a coward. Stop with all the 'what ifs' and be a Priestly. Andrea is _not_ opposed to gay people. Otherwise she would hate Nigel and practically half of the fashion industry. As a matter of her being a lesbian, well then we'll cross that bridge when we come to it. Now look what you've made me done. I'm talking aloud to myself like I'm a lunatic."

Grumbling, Miranda stood up and untied her robe before dropping it into a chair next to her bed. She pulled back the covers and slipped in between them, sighing contentedly when she felt the familiar coolness envelop her body. After tossing around for a while, Miranda made up her mind that she was going to contact Andrea tomorrow and change both of their lives (hopefully for the better). She prayed that Andrea would be willing to give her a chance. Miranda opened the magazine again and looked at Andrea's form one last time, the moonlight illuminating the page. She reached her index finger out and touched Andrea's smiling face one last time before closing her eyes and falling asleep.

**Thoughts? Comments? Suggestions? Please review! Thank you!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Thank you everybody for showing interest in this story! I definitely don't follow Anne Hathaway's process for getting the role of Fantine in Les Mis, but hopefully it's realistic enough.**

"Andrea," Miranda said without the accent.

Her first assistant came rushing in with a pad and pencil in hand. Her long brown hair was up in a bun and a few tendrils of hair fell down past her brown eyes. Miranda sighed internally. She had hired the new assistant- whatever the hell her name was-because she looked like the real Andrea. Of course, she was hardly a substitute, but every time Miranda saw her, her spirits couldn't help but lift a bit before sinking back down when she realized that it was not Andrea. It was pathetic, she knew, but at least when she looked into the assistant's brown eyes, she could pretend she was looking at Andrea.

"Yes Miranda?" the over-eager assistant chirped.

"Get me Andrea's number," Miranda said in clipped tones. She was going to do it. She was going to contact Andrea, and she wasn't going to back down at the last second.

"Wait, mine?" the girl blinked stupidly.

Miranda had to physically restrain herself from doing something rash. It was times like these where she actually missed Emily. The redhead was competent, and was efficient. Alas, she had moved on to work as a design editor, studying under Nigel's wing.

"Why," Miranda enunciated each of her words, "would I want to have your number?"

"Uh," 'Andrea' stuttered. "I thought you were talking about me…I, I don't know."

"You. Don't. Know." Miranda leaned forward and hissed, "Get me Andrea _Sach's_ number. Now."

"Yes Miranda," the girl scrambled to get away.

It didn't take her long to find the number, and she returned to Miranda's office and waved the piece of paper she had jotted down the number in the air. She handed the note to Miranda and was alternating her weight from her left foot to her right.

"I found it!" she exclaimed, looking proud of herself. "Oh my gosh. Is it _really_ Andrea Sachs? The girl who played Fantine in-"

"That's all," Miranda growled.

"Right," a light pinkness formed on the assistant's blush-covered cheeks. She turned to go.

"And Andrea?"

"Yes?" the girl flinched.

"Don't bother me."

Miranda's terrified assistant nodded and slipped out of the door, shutting it behind her. Miranda was left in her office alone, staring at the 10-digit number on the white paper. Woman-ing up, she picked up her phone and dialed the number. She almost pushed 'Dial' but then chickened out and hung up. Breathing evenly through her nose, she dialed the number again and waited for Andrea to pick up. Her heart almost leapt into her throat when she heard the soft voice she missed so much resonate through the phone.

"Hello?"

"Andrea," Miranda breathed.

"Miranda?" her voice was surprised. "Why are you calling me?" she backtracked, "Not that I'm unhappy to hear from you, it's just that, well, I haven't spoken with you in what, four years? It's-"

"You're babbling Andrea," Miranda's voice was amused, and she allowed a smile to play on her lips. Usually blabber would bother her, but she found it endearing when Andrea did it.

"Right, sorry," Andrea sounded embarrassed.

There was a short pause.

"I suppose a congratulations is in order," Miranda clutched her phone tightly, wrapping a finger around the cord.

"Why?"

"Your first acting job was a success."

"Wow," Andrea sounded incredulous. "Did you, I mean, well-"

"Did I see the film? Yes, I did."

"Um, what did you think?" her voice was timid.

"I thought I already made it clear Andrea. I enjoyed it very much. Your acting is…acceptable." Miranda held her breath.

"Wow," Andrea repeated, completely shocked. "Thank you so much Miranda. I really appreciate it."

"I was wondering-" Miranda cleared her throat. "I mean, Runway was wondering if you would be available to do a photo shoot. I've noticed you haven't had any magazine features yet, and we would be honored if we could be your first."

"Uh," Andrea, wonderstruck, gulped. "That would be wonderful Miranda. What time?"

"How about two days from now? Friday?"

She heard shuffling in the background. "Um I'm afraid that won't work. I have something going on then. Actually, my whole entire month is taken up. Would tomorrow be too early?"

"No, that would work," Miranda said, puzzled by Andrea's schedule. Her voice sounded a little shaky too. The slight tremor was almost hidden beneath the solid voice, but it was present. "How about three in the afternoon tomorrow?"

"That works for me! Thank you so much Miranda."

"I was wondering," Miranda hesitated before pushing on, "if you would like to accompany me to lunch today."

Andrea got quiet. Miranda panicked.

"Unless you already have plans…" Miranda trailed off.

"That would be wonderful," Andrea said softly.

"Would you like to go to Smith and Wollensky's?"

"Sure."

"I'll meet you there in an hour?"

"Sounds good. See you then Miranda."

"Good bye Andrea," Miranda was gripping her phone so tight, her knuckles were white.

For the first time in her life, she waited for Andrea to hang up before she did. She placed the phone back into its cradle, and swiveled her chair around so she was facing out the window. Miranda took off her glasses and dangled them between her fingers. She rested her index finger on her upper lip, and simply sat for a while, contemplating the younger woman's behavior. Something was off, even if she did try to hide it. Making a mental note, she resolved to find out when she saw Andrea soon.

Miranda couldn't help but smile when she thought of the idea that she was going to meet her former assistant in less than 55 minutes.

"Andrea," she called.

"Yes Miranda?"

"Clear my schedule for the next three hours. Call Roy and have him waiting in about an hour. Have coffee when I return, and tell Nigel to design a feature page for Andrea Sachs. Inform the staff to set up for a photo shoot tomorrow at three. They know what to do. That's all."

'Andrea' took longer than necessary in writing everything down, and Miranda could feel her frustration growing. Luckily for the assistant, she left before Miranda could act upon her anger.

She sighed and turned back to her paperwork. She worked on it for about twenty minutes before looking up and stretching her neck. Standing, she straightened out her Dolce and Gabanna jacket and smoothed her Vivienne Westwood skirt. Miranda swept out of her office and barked, "Coat. Bag." to Andrea. After she had plucked the coat and bag out of her assistant's hands (there was no way Miranda was going to let Andrea put on the coat for her) she proceeded briskly down the hallway and stepped in the elevator, chasing out a skinny model who squeaked and wobbled out on her 6-inch heels. Miranda chuckled softly to herself when she was alone in the elevator. She took the time to put on her coat and her trusty Prada sunglasses.

The sadistic part of Miranda enjoyed seeing other people's fear when she passed by them. Today was no different, as Miranda confidently strutted out of the building, her heels clacking on the polished floor. Grown men, models, designers, even janitors cowered before her. They all made haste, and scattered out of the path of the Dragon Lady.

_"It's so efficient," _Miranda thought, _"to get from one place to another."_

She made her way outside, shivering slightly when the chilly breeze hit her. Roy was waiting patiently outside for her, holding the car door open. Miranda slid in and Roy shut the door behind her, shielding her from the cold. Once inside, she took off her sunglasses and fiddled with them. There was no doubt she was nervous. Her mind worked overtime to think of conversations she could have with the younger woman, and she almost gave herself a headache from thinking so hard.

This time around, Miranda paid attention to her surroundings, and was out of the car before Roy could even open the door for her. Sunglasses were back on her face, and she looked every bit the fearsome Editor she was.

"I'll be about two hours," Miranda tossed over her shoulder.

Roy nodded, climbed back into the car, and drove off. Miranda squared her shoulders, adjusted her posture, and strolled into the restaurant.

"Hello ma'am, how many-" an attractive waitress began her normal speech.

"Does Andrea Sachs have a table?" Miranda interrupted, taking off her sunglasses and pining the poor waitress with glare.

"Yes, she is sitting over there," the waitress pointed to a secluded booth that was hidden in the corner.

Miranda could see a hint of dark hair peek over the back of the booth, and her heart lifted. She left without another word, leaving the waitress confused. Approaching the booth, she noticed Andrea had taken time and effort into dressing nicely. She wore black True Religion jeans, and a cream colored blouse. Her accessories were just right too. "_It's for me,_" Miranda thought dizzily. She noticed with a slight frown, however, that Andrea was currently staring off into space with a blank expression on her face.

However, when Miranda came closer, Andrea's face morphed into a small grin.

"Miranda," she said, standing and giving Miranda the customary pecks on the cheeks. Her soft lips brushed past Miranda's cheeks, and Miranda wanted more.

"Andrea," Miranda managed to get out.

Andrea walked behind Miranda and gently took off her coat, her fingers brushing against Miranda's neck inadvertently. She walked away, hung the coat up, and returned to the table with a smile on her face. Miranda couldn't help but observe how thin Andrea had gotten. Andrea slid into the seat across from her and rested her hand on the back of her neck.

"How are you?" Andrea asked, breaking the ice.

"I'm fine," Miranda replied. "And you?"

Andrea stared off into space for a second. "I'm…busy. The acting business is harder than I thought." She shrugged. "But I am really enjoying it so far. There's so much to learn, and I'm just scratching the surface."

"Mmm," Miranda hummed.

A blonde waitress came over, breaking the silence that blanketed them.

"Hi my name is Mandy, and I'll be your waitress today. What would you like to drink?"

"I'm fine with water," Andrea said and smiled.

"I would like an iced tea," Miranda said and did not smile.

"I'll be right back with your drink. Do you know what you will have to eat today or would you like some time to look over the menu?"

"I'll have a Caesar salad please," Andrea said and handed her menu over to the waitress.

"I'll have a steak. Medium rare. No sides," Miranda handed her menu to Mandy too.

"All right, I'll be right back with your drink soon, and your orders should be ready in no time!"

"Thank you," Andrea turned her attention back to Miranda.

"A Caesar salad?" Miranda raised an eyebrow. "I thought you were done dieting."

"No, I'm done. A salad just sounded good to me," Andrea explained.

"How much weight did you have to lose for the film?"

"About 25 pounds."

"Andrea!" Miranda was shocked. "Did that threaten your health?"

"No, I had doctors and professionals telling me how to lose the weight the right way. It really wasn't that hard, besides" Andrea snorted, "at least I'm not fat anymore."

"You were never fat," Miranda wanted to hit herself in the head for ever saying those words.

"That's ok, it's over and done with," Andrea grinned. "Besides, even though it sucked-I mean it stunk-when you said it, at least I knew I made an impression on you. Besides, you said I was the 'smart, fat girl'. So at least you thought I was smart!"

"But that's no excuse," Miranda growled, angry with herself. "That was mean, and-"

"It's fine Miranda," Andrea's eyes crinkled. "Stop beating yourself up over it."

The waitress came back with Miranda's ice tea and set it down on the table.

Miranda took a dainty sip, savoring the flavor of the cool liquid washing down her throat, and sighed. Looking at the beautiful woman across from her, she could see faint stress lines, and a hint of shadows under her expressive brown eyes that concealer couldn't quite hide. She felt contrite.

"Andrea, I apologize for blacklisting you. It was rash, and I shouldn't have done it from _every_ publishing company."

Andrea ran her fingertips around the rim of her glass.

"I'm not going to lie, I was really upset when you did, but what did I expect? I abandoned you at your busiest time. I would've blacklisted myself if I were you too," Andrea paused and took a sip of water. "Apology accepted. I'm also sorry for leaving you so unprofessionally."

"Apology accepted," Miranda smiled faintly. "Now with that settled, will you care to indulge me in the last four years of your life? How did you land the role of Fantine?"

"Well after I returned from Paris, I knew I had to find work quickly," Andrea started to explain. "My boyfriend at the time, Nate, had left me to work as a sous-chef in Boston. I was happy for him. It was time for us to break up anyways, but without him, half of my money was gone. I couldn't afford my apartment anymore."

"Oh my, were you homeless?" Miranda was scared of her response.

"Not completely, my friends Doug and Lily took me in. I alternated sleeping on their couches. I worked odd jobs for a while-I was a babysitter, a house cleaner, and I worked at multiple restaurants at a time so I could move out and get my own place. As soon as I saved up enough money, which took a little over a year, I purchased a small apartment, and moved in quickly. I felt bad for crashing at their places," Andrea paused and took a drink of water. "But I paid them back for everything I used. Anyways, onto my tale of getting the role of Fantine. Lily owns an art gallery, and she had a few pieces that became really popular. She had multiple gallery openings, and I was at all of them. Then at one of them, the director for Les Mis, Tom Hooper, walked in and we started chatting. It was so surreal. I couldn't believe that I was speaking to someone famous. The only famous person I've talked to is…you," Andrea looked up and blushed. "Anyways, he was telling me how I had 'the look' that he was going for, and one thing led to the next, and soon I had landed the role, acting along with other amazing actors such as Russell Crowe and Hugh Jackman. It was so nerve-wracking. It was the first time I had sung or acted in front of other people before, but everyone was really nice and supportive."

"Your voice is incredibly beautiful," Miranda whispered. "And your acting abilities…good lord."

"Thank you," Andrea blushed.

"I must admit, you had me in a blubbering mess by the time the movie was done," Miranda looked down and clasped her hands firmly.

Andrea reached over and gently untangled Miranda's hands. She squeezed Miranda's hands her own and flashed her best smile.

"Miranda, that means so much to me, although I'm sorry you were reduced to such a state," Andrea's fingers rubbed the spot that formed a 'v' between Miranda's thumb and pointer finger.

The waitress came back, and Andrea pulled back her hands, much to Miranda's dismay. She set two plates full of food down in front of the women and stepped back.

"Is there anything else you would like?"

"No, thank you," Andrea said. "Everything looks delicious."

After Mandy left, Miranda felt her mouth dry up. She couldn't believe what she'd made the other woman do. "I'm so sorry Andrea."

"Miranda, it's alright," Andrea flashed her white teeth. "It was a learning experience. Besides if you hadn't blacklisted me, I wouldn't have gotten that role. I realized that I loved acting; I just never gave it a chance. I love how I can become someone else."

She stabbed a piece of lettuce with her fork and raised it up to her mouth. Her jaw flexed as she chewed, and Miranda found herself drawn to the muscles in her chin and throat.

"Are you going to eat or just stare at me the whole meal?" Andrea smiled to take the edge off of her words.

Miranda shifted uncomfortably. "Sorry."

"Don't be," Andrea took another bite of her salad and swallowed. "How are the girls?"

"Teenagers," Miranda summed it up in one word. She cut a bite of steak.

"How old are they? Thirteen now?" Andrea chuckled when Miranda nodded in affirmation. "Ah, the hormonal years."

"Cassidy is the twin showing more potential right now. She's actually studying and working on her schoolwork. The only thing Caroline does is read _People_," Miranda shook her head, "which, by the way, you are in."

"I am?" Andrea squeaked.

"Yes."

"Hmm, I didn't know I was of that much interest," Andrea mused. "Anyways, so how are you handling the two teens?"

"They are a handful, but they are wonderful. The hardest thing about them is just connecting with them. They like things that I just don't have any interest in. I feel," Miranda paused. "Old." Miranda felt an ache in her chest. It had been so long since she had someone to confide her problems in-it felt nice to finally voice her insecurities to someone who cared.

"Miranda," she reached her hands over and grasped Miranda's hands again. "You are a wonderful mother. I think every parent goes through that stage where they have nothing in common with their child. Take my parents for example; when I was 13, all I wanted to do was write romance novels. I spent hours editing and revising stories that were probably awful. They didn't understand why writing was my passion at that age. My sister's passion was drooling over every single boy she could find. My parents obviously didn't approve of her hobby!" Andrea chuckled. "I think the only think you can do is to support Caroline and Cassidy. You can also find that one thing you have in common with both of them. With my family, our special thing was baking. Sometimes, all of us would just make an entire meal, and we would bond over that. And you are not old. I consider 70 and above old." Her eyes sparkled with something Miranda couldn't place. It wasn't love, but it was something close to it. Miranda blinked hard.

Andrea tried to pull her hands back, but Miranda held fast to them and squeezed gently.

"Thank you," Miranda said in a low voice. "That is the best advice I have ever received about my children."

Andrea smiled knowingly and interlaced their fingers. Both of their breathing sped up, and they unconsciously leaned towards each other.

"May I clear your plates?" Mandy, seemingly oblivious to the obvious tension crackling between the two women, grinned cheerfully as she looked from Andrea to Miranda.

Miranda's nostrils flared in annoyance. Her eyes narrowed, and she was about to yell at her, but Andrea softly rubbed her hand, and Miranda lost her train of thought.

"Yes, thank you," Andrea said and let go of Miranda's hand. "I'll take the check now."

Mandy dropped the check on their table, and Andrea slipped $40 dollars into it.

"Keep the change as a tip," Andrea grinned. She put her jacket on from where she tucked it into the side of the booth, stood, and held out her hand for Miranda to take. Happily accepting, Miranda interlaced her fingers with Andrea's again and allowed the younger woman to guide her along. Andrea grabbed Miranda's coat again, and held it out for the editor to slip into. They made their way outside and after they had walked together for a while, Andrea turned to face Miranda.

"Miranda, I had a lovely time today," Andrea said.

"As did I," Miranda agreed. "Thank you for lunch."

"No problem," Andrea blushed and looked down. "It was nice to see you again."

"You too."

There was a pause.

"I'll see you tomorrow then?"

"Yes. Can I give you a ride?"

"No, thank you. I'm fine."

Miranda leaned in and gave Andrea kisses on her cheeks, lingering a bit when her lips touched soft skin.

"Until tomorrow," she said softly in Andrea's ear.

Andrea shivered. "Until tomorrow."

* * *

Andrea threw her coat and purse into a chair.

"God damn it!" She yelled.

She threaded her fingers through her short hair and groaned. Tears began leaking out the corner of her eyes, and Andrea sank down to sit on the floor of her apartment. She _couldn't_ succumb to Miranda's charms. When she had heard her former employee's voice on the telephone, her heart rate had increased rapidly and her breathing hitched. When she had seen the Editor, she had been reminded how much it hurt when she walked away. She had truly missed Miranda over the last four years.

"Oh god," Andrea moaned. "I _touched_ her."

But she could not and _would_ not pursue any kind of relationship with Miranda, no matter how much she wanted to. Her secret prevented her from doing that. Andrea's heart ached.

"Ok, Just do the photo shoot tomorrow, and then Miranda will be out of your life," Andrea started crying again. "For good."

She stood and walked over to the wooden table where she had furiously tossed the papers that sealed her fate. Re-reading the results, her heart sank even further and she felt scared, hopeless, and angry all at the same time.

"It's not fair," Andrea whispered as she thumbed the page.

Andrea sniffed and wiped away her tears with the back of her hand.

"You can do this," Andrea spoke out loud to herself. She took a deep, shuddering breath. "I _have_ to. For Miranda's sake, and your own. You are strong enough to handle this."

Too tired to do anything for the rest of the day, Andrea crawled into bed and hid from the world, Miranda, and the damned papers that seemed to be mocking her.

**As always, please review! Thank you :)**


	3. Chapter 3

**Thanks to everyone who read/reviewed/followed/favorited! :) Your feedback is greatly appreciated!**

Andrea woke up with a groan and checked the time. 10:14 am. She flopped back down on her sheets. Her whole body ached, and she just wanted to go back to bed. She knew she couldn't of course-she just _had_ to open her big mouth yesterday and accept Miranda's invitation. So with a reluctant sigh, Andrea dragged herself out of bed, slowly showered, and got dressed. She wore a zip-up jacket with just a black lacy bra underneath so she could change into the different outfits faster. She fluffed up her short hair and applied foundation over her dark shadows, skipping mascara and eye shadow.

Andrea buttered a piece of toast and stared out of the window while she ate. After rinsing off her dishes, she sat on her couch and watched mindless television shows to keep her mind at ease. After a couple hours of watching a marathon of _Say Yes to the Dress_, Andrea's eyes felt like sandpaper and her head hurt from watching her tiny television screen. She rolled her neck slowly and rubbed her eyes. Yawning, she checked the clock. It was time for lunch already. Andrea made a small sandwich with turkey, cheese, and lettuce on it. After eating, Andrea picked up her phone and dialed a number by memory.

"Hello?"

"Lily, hi," Andrea leaned against the table.

"Is everything okay?" Lily asked immediately.

"I'm fine," Andrea let out a weak laugh. "I was wondering if you were still available tomorrow to drive me to and from the hospital."

"Of course girl," Lily wanted to cry. "Your appointment's at 10 am, right?"

"Right," Andrea felt herself choking up too. "It shouldn't take that long. Probably an hour or two at the most."

Lily squeezed her eyes shut to quench the tears. "Alright."

"Thank you Lily."

There was a pause.

"Are you afraid?"

"Very much so," Andrea choked back a sob. "I'm so nervous."

"Don't be honey," Lily tried to comfort her. "You're in good hands, the doctors are wonderful, and you'll be done in no time at all."

Lily listened for a response, but all she could hear was her friend's erratic breathing on the other end. She felt her own heart break.

"I love you Andy. You're my best friend. I'm confident that you will be okay."

"I love you too Lil," Andrea took a shaky breath. "Thank you so much for everything you're doing."

"No problem Andy. How are you going to pay for everything?"

"From doing Les Misérables, I received a substantial amount of money. I've been really careful at spending it. You know I'm still living in the same apartment that Nate and I shared? It's pretty cheap compared to moving into a new condo. I also have money saved from babysitting Mrs. Plighton's kids. I swear, that woman's made out of money. And I'm not wearing any fancier clothes-Hey, speaking of which, guess what?"

"What?"

"Miranda contacted me yesterday and wondered if I could do a photo shoot," Andrea couldn't help the smile that stretched across her face when she thought about the white-haired woman.

"Miranda Priestly?!" Lily yelped into the phone. "You haven't spoken with her for over four years! What did you say?"

"Well I said I could do it!" Andrea pulled out a chair and sat down.

"How did you find time in your schedule to do that?"

"Easy. Today is the last day I have open for a while, so I said I would do it today," Andrea crossed her legs.

"That's really how you want to spend your last day of freedom?"

"Yes, I think it will be fun."

"Does Miranda know about-" Lily started.

"No," Andrea cut her off, "and I intend to keep it like that. I'll just do the photo shoot today and then I won't contact her anymore. It'll be just like it has for the last four years."

"You sound sad," Lily felt like an ass but kept pushing. "Why?"

"Because today is the last time I'm going to see her!" Andrea blubbered into the phone. "I miss her Lil."

"Andy, the woman took away a year of your life, pushed you to your limits, blacklisted you, and you _miss_ her?" Lily was aghast.

"I know it sounds crazy," Andrea said, "but I have _feelings_ for her. It took yesterday for me to realize that truly."

"Wait. What happened yesterday?"

"I had lunch with her," Andrea said weakly. "We talked, I gave her advice...It was nice."

"Wow." was all Lily could say.

"I know you really dislike her," Andrea started. "But-"

"Hey, I was a bitch," Lily shook her head, "and I'm sorry for that. It was totally unfair to you, and I should have been more supportive. I guess I felt like Miranda was taking over your personal life."

"Well, she did," Andrea blushed. "So I understand your reasoning for hating her."

Lily sighed. "Sure she doesn't make my list of top ten favorite people, but I don't hate her. Besides, if she makes you happy Andy, then how can I?"

"Thanks Lil," Andrea breathed a sigh of relief since she didn't have to put up with Lily's constant complaining of Miranda again.

"So you have feelings for her…" Lily trailed off.

"Yep," warmth spread itself across Andrea's cheekbones.

"Are you going to do anything about it?"

"No, I already told you," Andrea felt tears prickling again. "I'm not going to."

"Why on earth not?"

"I'm scared. What if I don't…survive?" the last part came out a whisper.

"Oh sweetie," Lily started crying too. "Don't say that. You _will_ survive."

"I don't want to put her through it with me. I don't want you to go through it with me," Andrea tried to voice her frustration. "I just feel so guilty."

"If I don't, then who will?" Lily's voice came out shaky but firm. "We're best friends. We stick by each other through the thick or thin."

"Thank you so much Lily," Andrea rested her head in her hands. She looked at the clock as she wiped her eyes. "Hey I have to go. Photo shoot time. I cannot thank you enough Lily."

"Love you Andy," Lily said softly. "See you tomorrow. I'll come by around 8."

"Love you too, and sounds good," Andrea responded and hung up.

She wiped the last of her tears away, and stood up. After grabbing her winter coat, she made her down the stairs quickly and opened the door. Shivering when the chilly winter air hit her, she burrowed deeper into her coat and hastened down the sidewalk. She soon reached the bustling area of Times Square. Andrea always took a moment to absorb all the color and the flashiness advertising different shows before continuing on, and today, she was shocked to see her own photo running across a billboard. It was advertising for Les Mis, and soon, her image dissolved to reveal Amanda Seyfried's picture.

Andrea suppressed a huge grin, and started walking again. She stopped at Starbucks briefly, and picked up Miranda's favorite drink before continuing on her path to Runway. She opened the big doors, and nodded to the guards who smiled at her. They seemed to remember her from the time she was Miranda's assistant.

"_Or, they know me from Les Mis,_" Andrea thought with a small chuckle.

She made her way up to Runway's floor, and walked down the long hallway to Miranda's office. Her heartbeat quickened when she saw the infamous silver coif. Miranda was currently bending over something, her black frames resting on the tip of her nose, and a red pen in her right hand.

"Oh my goodness!"

Andrea was startled out of her study of Miranda by a loud voice. She turned to see a woman who faintly resembled herself sitting at Emily's desk. The woman was wearing a bright yellow dress, and her brown hair tumbled down her back in ringlets. She wore dark makeup and her lips were painted a bright shade of pink. Andrea personally thought the outfit was horrible, since there was too much going on, but the woman's panic caused her to panic, leaving no more time to speculate upon it.

"What?" Andrea swiveled her head around, looking for the source of the other woman's alarm.

"You're Andrea Sachs!" the copy of her cried out.

"Uh, well yes, I am," Andrea felt self-conscious.

"Wow! I'm such a huge fan," the woman stood and practically skipped around her desk. "My name's Kelly."

"Nice to meet you Kelly," Andrea awkwardly shook the enthusiastic woman's hand. "What happened to Emily?"

"Oh you mean the redhead?" Kelly cocked her head to the side, reminding Andrea of a puppy. "She moved on to being a Design Editor. She's studying with Nigel now. I was the second assistant, so voilà! I took the position." Kelly giggled.

"Ah," Andrea took a moment to process that information. Too much had happened since she'd been gone. "Well I have an appointment with Miranda now. May I go in?"

"Of course, of course," Kelly could hardly contain her delight.

Andrea gently rapped on the door, and when Miranda looked up, she had to remind herself to breathe normally. Gorgeous blue eyes pierced hers, and they softened.

"Hello Miranda," Andrea smiled and stepped into her office. "I brought you coffee."

She leaned over to set the drink down on Miranda's desk.

"Good afternoon Andrea. Thank you," Miranda said softly.

Andrea gaped at the foreign words coming from Miranda's mouth. "N-no problem Miranda. I was happy to do it." _Happy to do it? You sound like an idiot._

"Just let me finish up here, and then I'll show you where we'll go," Miranda gestured to a chair. "You can sit down if you want."

_We'll go?_ In a daze, Andrea sat and busied herself by looking around Miranda's office.

After a few moments, Miranda looked back up and took off her glasses.

"Are you ready Andrea?"

"Yes," Andrea said.

"Andrea!" Miranda called.

Andrea looked confused.

"I call my first assistant Andrea," Miranda quietly whispered, liking the shock that flitted across the brunette's face.

Kelly came running in with her trusty notepad.

"Yes Miranda?" she snuck glances at Andrea, which made Miranda's jealousy flare.

"Get 10 skirts from Calvin, 5 tops from Banana Republic, and call Patrick to tell him that I will be attending his party. When you're done with that, the twins' need new shoes and Patricia needs a bath. Proofread the twins' essays. If they receive less than an A, I will be very disappointed," Miranda fired off, incensed.

Kelly scribbled as fast as she could. When she was done, she looked back up and shuffled her feet.

"Is there some reason you're still here?" Miranda spat.

"Uh, I have a question," Kelly squirmed much like a puppy who was trying to contain its energy.

"Yes?" Miranda said impatiently.

"Can I have your autograph?" she blurted and held out her notepad and pen to Andrea.

Andrea blushed. "Sure." She took the items from the eager hands, and signed 'To Kelly, love Andrea' quickly. She gave it back to Kelly with a smile. Kelly shrieked out loud when she read Andrea's inscription.

"LOVE ANDREA?!" she squealed.

Miranda's jealousy meter flew through the ceiling. "If that's all, kindly remove yourself from my office and stop shrieking like a banshee. Do the things I asked, and if you're not done in the next hour and a half, consider yourself fired."

Kelly gaped, her joy momentarily forgotten when Miranda asked the impossible of her. Then she re-read the note, licked her lips, and grinned. She threw her arms around a stunned Andrea, and flew out of the office. Miranda's hands clenched as she watched her assistant run away. A small laugh broke the silence.

"She reminds me of my childhood puppy, Pencil," Andrea chuckled. "So full of energy and life."

"Energy is one way of looking at it," Miranda groused.

She stood up and brushed off her slacks. Andrea followed suit, and held out her hand.

"Ready?"

Relief flood through Miranda's heart, and she gratefully interlaced her own fingers with Andrea's.

"Let's go."

**As always, please review! Thank you! PS. I think you can guess what's wrong with Andrea now! **


	4. Chapter 4

**So I used super awesome poses Anne Hathaway had from her previous photo shoots as inspiration for Andrea's pictures, so you can find them online if you would like! Had so much fun writing this chapter, so I hope you enjoy! Thanks again everyone! **

"Look down to the right."

Andrea obeyed the command given by the blonde and tried hard to suppress a flinch when Serena worked the black mascara through her already long lashes. She was sitting on a makeup stool as the beautiful Brazilian was applying her makeup. Miranda was standing a few feet away, overseeing the production of the photo shoot as she discreetly stole glances at the brunette.

"Okay. You're done!"

Serena stepped back and admired her handiwork, occasionally brushing Andrea's face with her fingertips. Andrea looked in the mirror. She looked…well the same. Serena hadn't done anything except for enhance her natural features. She must have looked disappointed because Serena let out a light laugh.

"Don't worry Andy, this is just the natural look. Miranda wanted to do a Les Mis shot, so she had me do as little as possible. When you're done with that though, I'll make you look hotter than Eva Green."

Andrea snorted before giggling. "Thanks Serena. I really appreciate it."

"No problem," Serena leaned in, and they gave the customary air-pecks.

After Serena had swept away, Andrea subtly reached up and gently touched the bump on the back of her neck. Thankfully it was well-hidden and almost unnoticeable, but she couldn't help but feel scared somebody would question her about it. She hastily dropped her hand from her neck when she saw Miranda approaching and beamed at the Editor.

"You look lovely Andrea," Miranda's eyes raked across her face.

Andrea had to suppress a shiver. "Thank you."

"Serena has already informed you of the first shoot I want to do. Since our interview is mostly about Les Mis, I want to have a dominant photo to match the text," Miranda said.

"Sounds good," Andrea stood up from the stool.

"Your outfit is with Nigel," Miranda felt a shoot of jealousy when she saw Andrea's face light up at the mention of her old friend's name. _Stop it. Nigel is gay. Stop being jealous when you have no reason to be._

"Okay, I'll meet you back here then?"

"Yes."

Andrea grinned at her and then made her way over to where the bald man stood. Miranda desperately wanted to go over and spy on their conversation, but refrained. She was acting petty. Andrea wasn't even_ hers_, and already, she wanted to kill anybody who even_ looked_ at the brunette. A growl rose up in her throat, and she turned away from the two friends reconciling. She needed coffee. Now.

"Emily…"

* * *

"Hey Nigel!"

"Six! I haven't seen you in a while!"

The two embraced.

"So tell me Six, how on earth did you manage to land such a huge role?"

They started walking.

"Nothing to tell really," Andrea shrugged her shoulders. "The director saw me, asked me to read a couple of lines, and then boom! I got the part."

Nigel let out a low whistle. "That sounds too easy."

"Well thanks," Andrea pretended to be offended.

"You know what I mean."

Nigel paused outside of the Closet and threw the doors open.

"Ah, déjà-vu!" he sighed dramatically.

"Except now I'm about 2 sizes smaller, and have more fashion sense," Andrea chuckled.

"I've been meaning to talk to you about that," Nigel disappeared behind a rack. "What are you now? Size 0? Doesn't matter, you're looking fab darling."

"Thanks," Andrea sighed.

She would never understand nor agree with the fashion industry's perspectives on women's bodies. Apparently looking like a skeleton was attractive in their world. But she didn't blame Nigel-women's outrageously skinny bodies surrounded him everyday, so his image of a woman's figure was badly warped.

"Ta-da!" Nigel showed Andrea the tattered dress she wore in the film.

"Nice! Where did you get it?" Andrea fingered the dirty-colored dress.

"Miranda had the original shipped over."

"Oh, well mind if I get dressed here?"

"Go ahead, I won't look," Nigel made a big show of turning his head to the side and squeezing his eyes shut.

"I don't care if you do." Andrea rolled her eyes.

She unzipped her sweatshirt, silently congratulating herself with her thoughtfulness, and shimmied out of her jeans. She took the dress off the hanger and slipped it on, noting with a heavy heart that it was loose. She didn't mention it of course.

"I'm done, can you help me lace it up?"

"Finally!" Nigel snapped his head back and looked at her.

Very childishly, Andrea stuck out her tongue at him. Nigel gave a toothy grin and hung the empty hanger back on to the rack. He turned his finger in a circle, and Andrea rotated on the spot.

"Darling, you need to take your bra off. The dress hangs off your shoulders, and it's a little low cut."

Andrea flushed, but obeyed.

"Ok, don't look."

She unhooked her black bra and flung it to the side where it miraculously landed on top of the rest of her clothes. She held the dress to her chest, and blew out a breath of air.

"Alright. Ready?"

Nigel started lacing her up. Andrea braced herself, but almost fell over when she heard Nigel's next words.

"So what's going on with you and our favorite Editor?" Nigel almost purred into her ear.

"What?" Andrea spluttered.

"Don't play innocent with me," Nigel suddenly pulled hard on the strings, making Andrea squeak with surprise. "There's obviously some chemistry there. Didn't you notice that Miranda couldn't keep her eyes off of you when Serena was doing your makeup?"

"Uh, no," Andrea didn't know what to say.

"Or what about lunch yesterday? Did she pay?" Andrea could _feel_ Nigel's smirk. She felt her anger rising at Nigel's teasing.

"First off," she started hotly, "we had a lovely lunch where all we did was catch up with each other. And no, she did not pay. I did."

"What a chivalrous thing to do for your first date," Nigel continued lacing her up, but with gentler hands.

"Oh shut up. It wasn't our first date," Andrea shook her head.

"But do you wish it was?"

Andrea sighed. "Yes. I do."

"Hmm then you should know that Miranda likes you back."

Andrea snorted. "Oh really? And how would you know that?"

"Andy, the only photoshoot Miranda showed up to was Madonna's. And that was probably because she wanted to make sure Madonna didn't pose naked, get drunk, or have sex with the crew. Either the photographer or I conduct all the other photoshoots. She picks the photos to use, but she doesn't care about the process," Nigel paused. "What I'm getting at here is that Miranda seems to genuinely care about you."

"Eh..." Andrea was doubtful.

"Trust me."

"Doesn't matter anyways," Andrea grumbled. "I can't start anything with her."

"Why not?" he asked as he finished tying her up.

"That," Andrea spun around and tapped his nose lightly, "is for me to know and you to find out. Thanks for lacing me up." Before he could say or do anything else, she practically skipped out of the Closet, leaving a bewildered Nigel behind.

* * *

"I'm ready!"

Miranda turned and her mouth dried when she saw the beautiful woman. Andrea's décolletage was on prominent display, and Miranda had to exercise all of the self-restraint she had not to pounce on the younger woman right then and there. Andrea walked over to her and Miranda let her eyes roam up and down her figure.

"Acceptable," Miranda licked her lips.

Andrea beamed. "So where do you want me?"

"We'll have you sit there," Miranda pointed to a backdrop that resembled rocks.

Andrea turned, almost making Miranda gasp audibly when she saw that Andrea wasn't wearing a bra. She padded barefoot over to something that resembled a log, and sat down on it, crossing her right leg over her left.

"Andrea, fold your hands in your lap, and don't cross your legs. Someone get me dark makeup." Miranda snapped a bit harsh, taking out her sexual frustration on both Andrea and her crew.

Andrea followed Miranda's orders quietly. Emily rushed to Miranda's side with multiple makeup brushes in one hand and several different dark shades of brown and black in the other. Miranda plucked the equipment out of the redhead's hands and strode over to Andrea without so much as a 'thank-you.'

"Miranda?" Andrea questioned, looking up with her expressive chocolate eyes.

"We need your body," Miranda fought off a blush, "to look as grimy as your dress."

"Oh, right," Andrea flushed a bit too.

Miranda opened a palette and loaded the dirty brown powder onto a fluffy brush. Tapping the edge of the brush on the side, she gently pressed it to Andrea's shoulder, making the brunette shudder slightly. Miranda worked silently, noticing small goosebumps appear wherever she moved the brush. She applied the color firmly in big sweeping motions and Andrea relaxed with each stroke of the brush. Every so often, Miranda would load up her brush again, either with the same color she was using, or a different one to shade with.

Once she reached Andrea's décolletage though, she pressed ever so gently down with her fingers as she smeared the color around the beautiful pale skin. She refused to blush or show the telltale signs that her hands were trembling slightly. Thankfully, Andrea's reaction wasn't too far from her own. The brunette could hardly form a coherent thought, other than '_Miranda is touching me.'_

Although the actions each woman displayed were plain and ordinary, there existed an undeniable link between them. Their bond intensified when their eyes locked. Miranda pushed her left finger up under Andrea's face, and gently held her chin in place as she started smudging the brown over the clear skin with two of her right fingers. Andrea's eyes fluttered shut in contentment before she forced them open again and looked into a sea of endless blue. Both of their eyes were open. Unguarded.

Miranda finished her task, never tearing her eyes away from the hypnotizing doe eyes. The whole room had gone silent, each person watching the incredible connection the two women had in that moment. It was simple, yet it was filled with unbelievable tenderness.

Andrea cleared her throat, suddenly aware of the awkward silence. "Thank you Miranda," she silently cursed herself for how breathy she sounded.

"My pleasure," Miranda said in a low voice.

She stepped back, and Emily materialized by her side to take the makeup brushes and palettes.

"I believe I hired the best," Miranda's laser eyes bore into the members of her staff once she realized that she and Andrea were the center of attention, "so why, are none of you working?"

Scattered mumbles of 'sorry Miranda' and 'won't happen again Miranda' were heard throughout the room as people rushed to please the Devil. Even though Miranda's tone was cutting, Andrea couldn't help a small smile stretching over her face when she saw her favorite Editor exhibiting such powerful control. It was a major turn on, and Andrea shifted uncomfortably, trying to quench all thoughts of Miranda being dominant in the bedroom. It was unsuccessful.

"Ready?" Miranda asked softly.

"Yes," Andrea smiled at her, "what pose would you like me to do first?"

_How about naked, stretched across my bed Andrea? That is the pose I desire the most._

Clearing her throat, she answered, "I want this photo to be dramatic, and really capture the sorrowful aspect of the film. You have free reign to do whatever you want. Either Nigel or I will tell you to change if we have to." Miranda looked around. "Speaking of, where is Nigel?"

"I don't know," Andrea shrugged. "I left him in the Closet."

"I'm here," Nigel said breathlessly, rushing up to Miranda's side. "There was a minor mishap with some of Andrea's outfits. But we fixed it."

Miranda didn't acknowledge Nigel; she merely turned away on her heel and went to stand behind the photographer, Leah.

"Don't think I caught your romantic interaction earlier," Nigel whispered under his breath as he waggled his eyebrows. "You sly vixen."

Before Andrea could respond, he practically danced away and took his position by Miranda's side again. The lighting was adjusted, and all was quiet. Andrea felt nerves flutter in her belly, but once she caught Miranda's gaze, she relaxed and started slipping back into the character she connected with.

Choosing to look away from the camera, she looked to the right and clasped her hands firmly in her lap. To make her face the perfect image of devastation, she thought of what the story meant to her, and what Fantine had to go through. She could hear the camera clicking, and she subtly moved her head, tilting it at different angles. Andrea then looked right at the camera and pierced it with a heartbroken face, allowing a few tears to slip out. Miranda wanted to run over and hug the seemingly anguished woman, but held herself back. Andrea tried different poses and different angles for a while longer before the photographer leaned back from the camera.

"Perfect," the photographer murmured as she clicked back through the photos she'd taken.

"Did you get what you wanted?" Andrea asked.

"Yes," Leah said absentmindedly, still looking through the photos. "You are a very good model."

"Thanks," Andrea giggled and then wiped away at the few errant tears still flowing down her face. "So we're done with the Les Mis scene?"

"Miranda?" the photographer asked for Miranda's approval.

"I think those pictures will do quite nicely," Miranda peered at the photos, her breaking all over again when she saw Andrea's face.

"Awesome!" Andrea chirped. She stood and winced when she felt pins and needles in her legs.

"I have an idea," Nigel said, sneaking a quick glance at Miranda, "can we have you pose topless?"

Andrea spluttered. "W-what? Absolutely not!"

Miranda was shocked as well. "Just what do you think you're doing?" she hissed at him.

"It will be in the most sophisticated manner," Nigel continued, ignoring both women's protests. "You won't show anything. I promise."

"Uh," Andrea trailed off. She thought about it for a moment. "Fine," she relented.

Miranda almost dropped her jaw. "Really?"

"Yeah," Andrea said. "As long as you don't show _any_ part of my chest."

"Promise!" Nigel grinned.

"Oh dear lord," Miranda whispered.

"What?"

"Nothing."

* * *

Thirty minutes later, Andrea's 'dirt' was cleaned off, her makeup reapplied light by Serena, and her hair brushed in such a manner that it looked like it was pinned up on the back of her head.

"Okay, so here?" Andrea fidgeted, playing with the color of her sweatshirt that she had put back on after she had changed out of her dress. At Leah's nod of approval, she sat down on the stool and quickly unzipped her jacket, letting it drop to the floor. Modestly, she covered her bare breasts with her arms and somewhat awkwardly looked at the camera.

"That's it," Leah said soothingly. "Just relax."

Miranda, meanwhile, had said nothing, for fear her voice would crack. Andrea was fast at covering up, but Miranda caught a quick glimpse of her pale skin. And it was enough to reduce her to an aroused mess.

Leah clicked some photos, and Andrea looked straight at the camera. She tried smiling.

"No, no smiling," Leah walked away from the camera. "You are pretty, so we want to showcase your natural face without any distractions."

She placed her hands on Andrea's forearms, sending shoots of jealousy and anger through Miranda. Leah guided Andrea's hand so that it would rest on top of her right shoulder, and look more sensual without being slutty. Leah rushed back to her place behind the camera and looked into the window.

"Perfection," Leah beamed. "Now part your lips slightly, and just gaze into the lens."

Andrea obeyed, and after a few more shots, she was done. She hastily put on the jacket, and sat more relaxed on the stool. While Miranda and Leah discussed the photos, Emily came over to where Andrea was sitting.

"Hey Em," Andrea greeted cheerfully. "It's been a long time."

"Yes, it has," Emily responded. "I just came over to see how you're doing."

"I'm doing fine," Andrea smiled. "And you?"

"Fine," Emily said.

With that, she turned to walk away. "By the way," she threw over her shoulder, "you're looking enviously thin. Are you on a cheese diet?"

"Nope, but it looks like it's working for you," Andrea gave her a dorky thumbs up. Emily rolled her eyes, but a slight tug at the corner of her mouth showed Andrea that her comment had the desired effect.

"Andrea."

"Yes Miranda?" she turned her body so she was facing her.

"We are ready to continue," Miranda slowly rubbed the bracelets on her arm.

"Alright, what outfit should I change into?" Andrea asked.

"Jocelyn or Nigel have those options in the Closet for you," Miranda waved her hand.

"Mmkay," Andrea slipped off the stool.

The rest of the photoshoot passed quickly. After Serena had adequately made Andrea look 'hotter than Eva Green', Andrea posed leaning against a window, sitting on a couch, and her personal favorite, posing with bubbles in an adorable pink dress. Her arms looked like she was parting a curtain, and she had a look of wonder on her face as she looked up. It was her favorite face because she could actually smile for that one!

Andrea headed back into the Closet and reluctantly changed out of the coral frilly dress. She dressed hurriedly, sliding her bra on and then her sweatshirt and jeans. After she hung the dress back up carefully, she emerged from the Closet and almost immediately, Miranda was right next to her.

"Andrea," Miranda's soft voice resonated through Andrea's ears, "your photos are wonderful."

"Whoa," Andrea breathed. Her mega-watt smile stretched across her face.

"What?" Miranda was awestruck. That gorgeous smile would be her undoing-she would do anything to see it.

"You never say 'wonderful'. You always say 'acceptable'!" Andrea laughed. "Thank you so much Miranda! You just made my whole entire week!"

"Mmm," Miranda hummed with pleasure. "You still have an interview to do. We can wait and do it later if you're tired though."

"No, it's fine," Andrea said. "Thank you though."

"Very well," Miranda ran a hand through her hair.

"Will you be interviewing me?" Andrea asked, somewhat hopefully.

"No," Miranda said, masking her disappointment. "Nigel will."

"Alright," Andrea shrugged. She paused for a moment before tossing out, "I do wish it were you though."

And with that, she sauntered away.

**As always, please review! Thank you!**


	5. Chapter 5

**Happy New Year! :D Thanks so much everyone. (PS. In case you haven't noticed, I finally got a title for the story! Please tell me if you hate it/like it/have suggestions for a better one!)**

Andrea pulled out the chair across from Nigel's desk and sat down in it. Nigel crossed his arms and ran his fingertip across his lips.

"All right, first things first," Nigel tapped his pen against the table. "Let's address the weight issue."

"I had to loose 25 pounds for the role. It was…hard. Especially since I love food!" Andrea chuckled. "I had to be obsessive about it-the idea was to look near death. I lost 10 pounds to begin filming, and then later dropped another 15 pounds."

"So what did you eat?" Nigel's face was a cross between fascination and shock.

"I ate nothing but two thin pieces of oatmeal paste a day. And I exercised _constantly_."

"Good lord," Nigel leaned back in his chair. "You could have died!"

"Well Hugh (Jackman) lost a lot of weight too, so there were doctors on the set to make sure we didn't starve ourselves to sickness or death," Andrea explained.

"Still," Nigel shook his head.

Andrea chuckled. "Yeah, it was pretty crazy! But it paid off in the end."

"You won a Golden Globe earlier this month and you are nominated for an Oscar this upcoming month with other prestigious actresses like Nicole Kidman and Sally Field."

Andrea blushed and looked down. "Yeah, I did, and yes I am. Best supporting actress…it's astonishing that I'm nominated."

"Do you think you have a good chance at winning the Oscar since you won the Golden Globe?"

"I would like to win," Andrea said modestly as she ran her fingers through her hair. She continued, choosing her words carefully, "but ultimately it's up to the Academy to decide. It's a bit intimidating to have my first film be such a success. My name shouldn't be up there with all of the other wonderful actresses that have done this their whole life. It's both an honor and a miracle that I was nominated, and I'm just happy that the film got the recognition it deserves. Also, Hugh is nominated too, so I'm excited for him as well."

"Later, we will discuss that charming little Armani Prive gown you donned at the Golden Globes," Nigel whispered, breaking away from his professional reporter voice. He clapped his hands and slipped back into his role. "Do you know what you're going to be wearing for the Oscars yet? They're just around the corner."

"I was thinking of wearing a white dress," Andrea snorted before continuing, "really classy, you know?"

"Hmm, yes. It's a beautiful color to wear on the red carpet," Nigel said. "It photographs quite well. However, you need to be careful so it does not look like a wedding dress."

"It won't!" Andrea assured him. "Anyways, I will be wearing my costume from the movie, so-"

"Wait why?"

"Because I'm going to be performing _I Dreamed a Dream_," Andrea grinned widely. "It's going to be nerve-wracking, but I'm really excited to do it!"

"Your voice is gorgeous, Six," Nigel twiddled with a large ring on his finger, "I had no idea that our ex-assistant was a secret songbird!"

"I have always loved singing," Andrea confessed, "and I've always wanted to do a musical at some point in my life, so this seemed like the perfect opportunity."

"_I Dreamed a Dream _was breathtaking," Nigel pushed his glasses up on his nose, "how did you prepare for that?"

"I practiced two months before filming. My job was to get people to feel and get people to empathize with my character," Andrea used her hands as she spoke, gesturing in the air as she talked, "it's fascinating that you can move people with your sheer beauty of your voice. Emotion comes before everything, so there seemed to be something selfish to go for the pretty version," Andrea cleared her throat. "Fantine is devastated, she's literally at the bottom of a hole looking up and realizing that she's never going to get out of it. I just decided to apply the truth to the melody and see what would happen."

"Well what happened is that you were marvelous," Nigel said honestly, grinning at Andrea's blushing face. "So the whole entire film was sung live?"

"Yes, each take was performed live. We had little earpieces that we wore that played the instrumental music while we acted and sang. It's the first time anyone has ever tried it like this. Tom Hooper gave us so much freedom with his decision to do it," Andrea smiled. "In an old school movie musical, the cast would have to record the songs in a studio, and then two months later, arrive on set and play the playback as we acted. The problem with that is that a person would have to make his or her acting choices three months before they've met the actor they would be working with. Singing live gave me the freedom to direct the way I wanted the song to go. I could move around when I wanted, and take pauses in the middle of the song if I wanted. There was just so much I _could_ do, since I wasn't restricted by the playback dictating what I _had_ to do."

"Did you have an idea of how you were going to perform the song before you shot the scene? Did you know what you were going to do?"

"Well, I had some ideas, but none of them really…popped," Andrea creased her brow in concentration, trying to remember. "I think I just went for it-it was all kinda a blur. I was so in character that it's hard to remember what I did exactly…I knew I was nervous, but I just went with my gut instinct on what to do. It took four takes to do, and the only thing I can remember is at the end, I thought it went by too fast. I wanted Tom to keep shooting after my 4th take, since I felt that it could still use improvement."

"It didn't," Nigel stated bluntly, making Andrea giggle.

"You're too kind sir," Andrea inclined her head towards him.

Nigel shook his head fondly. "Just stating the truth. Anyways, this seemed like such a demanding role, both physically and mentally. Am I correct in saying that?"

"You're right," Andrea rubbed the back of her neck, "I was in such a state of deprivation-both physical and emotional. When I got home, I couldn't react to the chaos of the world without being overwhelmed. It took me weeks till I felt like myself again, but I wouldn't hesitate to do it all over again. It was a wonderful opportunity and learning experience."

"And…how much dough did you get?" Nigel waggled his eyebrows.

"Nigel!" Andrea slapped him playfully. "Fine. It's enough to buy the newest pair of Jimmy Choos and some sweatpants, happy?"

"Very," Nigel said coyly and scribbled something on his sheet of paper.

"Wait, don't put that in the article!" Andrea shrieked.

"Wouldn't dream of it dear," Nigel lowered his eyes and kept writing furiously on the pad of paper.

"What are you jotting down?!" Andrea tried to peek over the desk, but Nigel kept shifting his body. "Nigel Kipling, if you print that, I swear, I will…I will SUE!"

"Don't get your knickers in a twist darling," Nigel patted her hand. "I won't. Promise."

"You'd better not," Andrea glared at him.

He held up his hands in mock surrender. "I have a few more questions to ask before you flounce away to your new girlfriend."

"G-girlfriend?" Andrea spluttered. "We've already been over this Nige, there is _nothing,_ and_ never_ will be. So drop it."

"Inquiring minds want to know though," Nigel shrugged his shoulders.

"There seems to be only one inquiring _snoopy_ mind," Andrea glared at him. "And my response is 'no comment'."

"Argh. Fine," Nigel sulked. "I will find out sooner or later."

"I'm sure you will," Andrea muttered softly.

"What's that?"

"Oh, nothing. I'm just preparing myself for more questions," Andrea turned her blinding smile on Nigel.

* * *

After saying her goodbyes to Nigel and dodging more questions about Miranda, Andrea left Nigel's office with a heavy heart. She hesitated before walking down the hallway to the elevator. It seemed like she was done, so she could just leave without telling anyone. But, Andrea's polite nature took over, and she concluded that it would be rude to leave without thanking Miranda again for the photoshoot and interview. She wandered to Miranda's office, a sense of déjà-vu overtaking her as she walked down the darkened hallway, the light slowly fading as the sun sunk behind the horizon.

She reached Miranda's office door and quietly stood there for a minute before making her presence known. Andrea leaned on the doorframe and greedily let her eyes wander over the scene before her. Miranda was standing with a red pen in her right hand, bent over a layout as her sharp eyes scanned the page critically. The only light in the room came from a lamp Miranda had turned on earlier.

"You know, this light isn't good for your eyes," Andrea said softly, startling Miranda slightly.

Miranda looked up and allowed a tiny hint of a smile to appear on her face once she saw it was Andrea. Her heart warmed when her brain registered Andrea's caring words.

"I'm almost done," Miranda said, making a few more marks on the layout before taking off her glasses and stretching her neck.

Andrea gulped when she saw the tense muscles in Miranda's smooth skin. Her fingers ached to touch and massage the stress away. She must have been staring too long with a look of lust on her face, since Miranda cleared her throat. Andrea's guilty brown eyes snapped back to Miranda's blue crystals that sparkled with amusement.

"Uh, sorry," Andrea mumbled. Then, pulling herself together, she continued, "I just wanted to say, thank you so much again for allowing me to take part in the photoshoot and the interview today. It was fun." _Fun?_ Andrea cringed at her poor choice of words.

Miranda blinked. "You are welcome."

"So, uh," Andrea rocked back and forth on her heels, feeling very awkward, "see you around?"

"Leaving so soon?" Miranda's voice dropped 10 degrees and Andrea tensed.

"Well yes, I mean, I have to get home," Andrea stuttered. "I have stuff…I mean _things_ to do tomorrow."

"Ah," Miranda pursed her lips.

_Crap._ Andrea didn't know what to say, so she nodded her head to Miranda and turned on her heel, choking back the tears when she remembered that it was probably the last time she would ever see the woman.

"Andrea, wait," the soft voice caressed Andrea's ear.

Suddenly, Miranda was right behind her. Andrea blinked hard to get rid of any signs that showed that her eyes were watering before she turned around.

"Yes Miranda?" she focused her attention on Miranda's smooth cheekbones.

"Would you like to have dinner with me tonight?" Miranda said quickly before she lost her nerve. Truth be told, she_ needed _to be around Andrea more. Four years of almost no communication had worn on her, and Miranda desperately wanted to try and make up for lost time. She cleared her throat before proceeding, "The twins are with their father for this weekend."

Andrea stood, shell-shocked. "I…I…"

Miranda held a thin finger up to Andrea's lips, making the brunette's breath catch. "May I suggest calling Roy and you can think about it in the car?"

"I…can't," Andrea whispered, her soft lips warming Miranda's finger.

"Can't what?" Miranda's heart dropped and she felt incredibly embarrassed. She yanked her finger away from the full sensual lips, and took a step back.

"I can't be involved with someone…" Andrea trailed off. She looked away, feeling the repressed tears from earlier threatening to make themselves shown again. "Not now. I'm so sorry."

"Why?" Miranda asked, her heart breaking. She felt incredibly foolish, and a bit embarrassed that Andrea saw her innocent invitation for what it really was-a date.

"I can't explain," Andrea's eyes shined with unshed tears. "I'm sorry. I can promise you that you will only get hurt. I'm better off alone."

"What was with all the touching in the restaurant yesterday?" Miranda started to get angry. "What about the touching today? You are sending multiple mixed signals. I'm trying to take a chance with you Andrea. Why won't you let me?"

"I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me. I shouldn't have done any of that," Andrea reached up and wiped away a few stray tears that leaked out. " I need to go." She turned to leave.

"No," Miranda said forcefully and reached out to grab Andrea's arm.

Andrea whimpered quietly, but Miranda, in her state of panic, didn't notice. She clutched Andrea's arm like it was her lifeline. "Please don't walk away again. You just came back to me."

"You will get hurt," Andrea tried to make Miranda understand without telling her secret. "It's…it's hard to explain."

"Can you honestly tell me that you feel _nothing_ for me?" Miranda tightened her hold on Andrea's jacket-covered arm, unaware of Andrea's soft moan of pain.

"Yes," Andrea averted her gaze. She attempted to free her arm of Miranda's grip, but was unsuccessful.

"I don't believe you," Miranda growled.

"Why not?"

"Because you wouldn't react to this."

Miranda yanked rather forcefully, and Andrea stumbled forward, crashing into Miranda's soft body. The white-haired Editor took advantage of Andrea's dazed state, and wrapped her arms around the thin frame, effectively trapping the brunette. Miranda leaned in quickly to press her lips firmly against the woman she…loved? No. It was too early for Miranda to be in love with the young woman. There certainly a strong attraction, and it seemed like it was mutual. Full lips parted underneath hers, and Andrea sighed. Miranda could taste the saltiness from the brunette's tears, and she was determined to kiss it away. But before she could deepen the kiss, Andrea seemed to come back to her senses and she yanked her body back. Her fingers came up to trace her own lips, and she locked eyes with Miranda. Both women were breathing heavily, and Miranda's hands stung from the loss of contact.

"You weren't, I mean, I wasn't," Andrea mumbled, trying to piece her scrambled thoughts together.

"See? There is something," Miranda said smugly.

"No," Andrea shook her head fervently. "Wait. Did anybody see that?" She frantically swiveled her head around.

"There is nobody."

Andrea visibly relaxed.

"Miranda, you deserve so much better than me. I can't be…what you want me to," Andrea's eyes filled with more tears. "I'm really sorry. But please, don't try and pursue this…whatever _this_ is."

"This, my dear Andrea, is the start of a relationship," Miranda bit her lip. "Or at least, I wish it would be."

"I'm sorry," Andrea repeated. She backed away. "I can't…"

"Tell me why!" Miranda exclaimed, her heart clenching with fear.

"Please don't push it. I can't tell you why," Andrea felt like a broken record. "I don't feel ready for a new relationship now." She finished lamely. "So please, just let me leave."

She turned around and strode away quickly.

"Andrea!"

Andrea ignored the heartfelt plea and kept walking down the hallway, her form quickly melting into the shadows. Miranda thought quickly. She couldn't lose her again. Miranda looked around hopelessly and then thought of the solution. It was going to be the most idiotic thing she had ever done in her life, but it was the only thing she could think of to keep the woman that owned her heart from leaving forever. Miranda awkwardly fell down and cried out in pain when her ankle throbbed. It worked. Andrea came hurrying back with an expression of concern on her face.

"Are you alright?" her voice sounded panicky. "What happened?"

"Fell," Miranda said through gritted teeth, secretly thrilled that her plan of deception had worked. "These damned heels."

"Oh good lord," Andrea gasped.

She leaned down and wrapped her arms around a slender waist. Using her thigh muscles, she pulled them both up. She held Miranda in a tight hug, not letting go for a second. Even though Miranda's ankle throbbed, it was worth the discomfort for Andrea to hold her in her arms. The brunette was slightly taller than her, which made Miranda feel oddly protected. Miranda tucked her face in the crook of Andrea's neck, nuzzling the soft skin.

"Don't scare me like that," Andrea gently scolded. Her hands rubbed up and down Miranda's back in soothing circles.

"Don't leave me like that," Miranda countered.

"You don't understand," Andrea wanted to scream. "I will never be able to be with you."

"But I want you," Miranda's forceful tone was muffled somewhat because she was cuddling her nose into Andrea's neck. "You have no idea how much I've missed you over the last four years."

"Oh but I do," Andrea rested her cheek on top of Miranda's soft hair, "because I've missed you the same amount-probably even more."

"Then be with me," Miranda breathed onto Andrea's soft skin. "You'd make me so happy."

"You don't think I'd feel the same way?" Andrea pulled back, but did not loosen her hold on the older woman. "I'm telling you Miranda, I _can't._"

Miranda didn't know what to say so she groaned in exaggerated pain. "Please, can we go to the townhouse? We can talk about it then."

Andrea gave her a long look but relented. "Alright."

Miranda called Roy, and Andrea helped into her coat before turning off the lamp. They were shrouded in darkness, but Miranda trusted Andrea to guide her. Andrea wrapped her right arm around Miranda's slender waist and supported her as they moved out of her office and towards the elevators. The ride down was quiet, which Miranda didn't mind. She snuggled her body up to Andrea's frame, savoring the closeness she felt with the young brunette.

Once outside, Miranda shivered and rested her head on Andrea's shoulder with her arms locked around Andrea's waist as she limped towards the car. The pain was real, but Miranda was milking it for all it was worth. The snow had started again, sticking to both women's hair and eyelashes. Andrea helped Miranda climb into the car, and once they had gotten themselves situated, Miranda lay stretched out with her feet propped up on the brunette's lap. Miranda had to suppress a gasp when she saw the white snow stuck on Andrea's chocolate hair. She looked beautiful, and it stole Miranda's breath away. Little did she know, Andrea was having similar thoughts about the white-haired Editor. She mindlessly traced Miranda's foot with her finger, and stared out the window in deep thought. Miranda felt a little bad, but she accomplished her goal-the object of her affections was with her. They rode in silence as the car drove through the silent flurries.

**Thank you for reading! :)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thanks everyone :) OH MY GOD. I SAW LES MIS YESTERDAY. ANNE HATHAWAY WAS FREAKING AMAZING.**

"Here, copy the position you were in earlier," Andrea said to Miranda, her breath making cloud puffs in the chilly air.

Miranda obeyed and hooked her arm just below Andrea's shoulders, reveling in the security she felt when the brunette wrapped her arm around Miranda's thin waist.

"Okay," Andrea breathed softly in Miranda's ear, "let's go slowly. I've got you."

_She has me._ Miranda felt dizzy when she heard the low declaration of protection. She didn't say anything, since she did not want to scare the brunette away. Yet she knew that Andrea would stay by her whatever she did-her phony fall earlier proved her theory that Andrea would always return to her. Miranda gently laid her head on the taller woman's shoulder and hobbled to the entrance to her house. She fished the key out from her pocket and quickly unlocked the door. Pushing it open, a large fluffy dog greeted her with enthusiastic kisses on her hands.

"Hello Patricia," Miranda cooed, scratching behing the St. Bernard's ears. "Good girl."

"Miranda, would you like me to check your foot?" Andrea asked, raising her arm up from around Miranda's waist so her hand rested flat on Miranda's back.

"Yes," Miranda replied, "let's go to my bathroom."

"Let me guess, it's upstairs?" Andrea crinkled her forehead.

"That is where my personal rooms are located, are they not?" Miranda raised an eyebrow.

Much to her relief, Andrea laughed. "Sorry. Let's go."

She kept her hand on Miranda's back and they ascended the stairs slowly.

"You know if I were stronger, I'd pick you up and carry you up the stairs," Andrea mused.

"That would be acceptable," Miranda allowed a smile to creep on her face. "I would enjoy that."

Andrea blushed and looked away. Miranda chuckled to herself. She _knew _the brunette had feelings for her-she just didn't know why the girl didn't act upon them. Finally, they made it up the stairs and into Miranda's bedroom. Andrea gasped when she stepped into the spacious room. It was painted white, but not a cold white-it had more a cream colored base that made it seem warmer. Her bed was enormous with a dark purple duvet covering it, and Andrea was willing to bet her bottom dollar that Miranda had silk sheets. An entire shelf of books lined one wall of her bedroom, while a large chair rested by another. Glancing at Miranda, Andrea found herself on the receiving end of a rare tender look.

"Like it?" Miranda asked.

"Yes! I knew you would have great taste," Andrea grinned.

"Thank you Andrea," Miranda gently squeezed Andrea's shoulder.

"You're welcome," she replied. "Come on, let's get you to the bathroom. I don't want your ankle to get any worse."

Miranda melted once she heard those words, and knew that Andrea would make a perfect wife. Shaking her head slightly, she tried to force such thoughts away, since they hadn't even reached the 'girlfriend' stage yet. They made their way towards Miranda's bathroom, and again, Andrea let out a gasp of surprise. The bathroom, if possible, was even more wonderful than the bedroom. A large marble Jacuzzi sat on the farthest wall away from the door with steps leading up to it, and the toilet and sink were also made of marble. The shower had no showerhead-just a panel in the ceiling with little holes for openings, and the controls were on the wall outside of the shower.

"Good lord Miranda," Andrea breathed. "This is wonderful."

"Would you like to use any of it? You can take a shower, or a bath if you would like to," Miranda offered.

"No, thank you," Andrea guided Miranda to the steps leading to the Jacuzzi and gently helped her sit down. "I really should be going soon."

Miranda's heart sunk.

"Would you like me to take your coat?" Andrea asked, oblivious to Miranda's heartache.

"Yes. Thank you," Miranda said as Andrea brushed her fingertips against her collarbone in her attempt to take off the heavy garment. She laid the coat carefully on the bathroom counter and returned her attention to the white-haired beauty.

"Aren't you going to take off your coat as well?" Miranda asked when she realized the brunette had made no attempt to shrug off her own winter jacket.

"I'm...chilly," Andrea lied through her teeth. "I'd prefer to keep it on."

"Alright," Miranda was confused, but didn't push further.

Andrea kneeled before Miranda, making her inhale sharply at the sight. Almost reverently, Andrea took the Editor's hurt foot in her right hand and gently took off the 4-inch heel. Miranda gasped again, but this time, it was in relief. Andrea skimmed her fingers lightly across the tender flesh and her large brown eyes critically scanned the pale flesh for any noticeable bumps or bruises. Miranda was struggling to keep her breathing in check, but with a beautiful woman kneeling at her feet and treating her like she was the most precious thing in the world, it was hard to do.

"Doesn't appear to be broken," Andrea sighed with relief as she stood up. "Just seems to be swollen and bruised. I'll go get some ice."

"Alright."

After Andrea left, Miranda limped over to her vanity and pulled open a drawer and grabbed a bottle of Advil. Filling a glass with water, she quickly downed two pills and hobbled back to the Jacuzzi steps. Andrea entered with an icepack that she thoughtfully wrapped up in a washcloth to protect Miranda's delicate skin from the cold. Kneeling at Miranda's feet again, she gently pressed the washcloth to the swollen, irritated skin and held it there. She looked up through lowered lashes, and Miranda found herself struck dumb at the sight. Andrea started up a conversation about Miranda's expansive book collection and was happy when she realized that Miranda had similar tastes in authors and genres. As the conversation turned to movies and ultimately Les Mis again, Andrea kept the ice pressed firmly against Miranda's ankle. Both women loved the feeling of being each other's presence, but did not comment on it.

"There, that should do it," Andrea murmured, lifting the washcloth away.

The swelling had gone down tremendously, thanks to Andrea's faithful hold on the ice. The Advil had also done its job, and Miranda didn't feel any pain when she gingerly rotated it in a circle.

"Thank you," she said, staring deep into the chocolate pools she loved to get lost in.

"My pleasure," Andrea whispered, gazing back.

Miranda cupped Andrea's cheek and Andrea sighed, sinking into the warm hand. Her eyes sparkled with tears at the gentle touch, but she refused to let Miranda see them.

"Aren't your knees terribly sore?" Miranda asked hoarsely.

"Not too bad," Andrea lowered her eyes.

"Come up here," Miranda dropped her hand from the soft cheek and gently grabbed Andrea's arm.

She pulled Andrea up so the brunette was sitting in between her legs, and in that position, Miranda was taller than her. Miranda hesitantly wrapped her arms around the thin frame and pulled her into a warm embrace. Andrea struggled to control the shakes that threatened to overtake her. Placing her hands flat against the middle of Miranda's chest, she leaned back and tried to escape, but Miranda held her in place.

"I have to go," Andrea said.

"Please don't," Miranda pleaded.

She leaned forward to rest her forehead against Andrea's, making the latter look down to hide her large brown eyes that were now shiny. Miranda tilted her head to the side, closed her eyes, and gently pressed her lips to Andrea's. Andrea didn't pull back, even though every fiber of her body was screaming at her to. Their lips stroked against each others languidly and softly. Andrea reached up to thread her fingers through Miranda's hair, much to the Editor's delight. Miranda's arms were slung loosely around Andrea's back, but she was getting annoyed with the coat covering the young woman's body. Sneaking her hands to the front of Andrea's coat, she opened the buttons and attempted to slide her hands in, but was thwarted by Andrea jerking back. Their lips broke apart and they panted heavily, looking deeply in each other's eyes.

"I'm-"

"Andrea, do not finish that sentence. I am _not_ sorry, and I regret nothing," Miranda grasped Andrea's hand and held it to her own chest. "Feel my heartbeat? It's going crazy." Miranda's laser eyes bored into Andrea's. "And it's because of you."

Andrea's eyes widened and she gulped. Miranda took that opportunity to lean in for another earth-shattering kiss, pouring her soul onto Andrea's lips. Andrea stiffened before relaxing and reciprocating fully. Licking the plump lips, Miranda's tongue darted into a hot, wet mouth. Their tongues battled against each other as air was greedily sucked through noses. Miranda stood, pulling Andrea up with her and they stumbled out of the bathroom and into the bedroom, their lips still locked in a passionate and fiery kiss. Andrea felt the soft duvet hit the back of her legs and she smirked against Miranda's lips.

"I knew it," Andrea murmured as her back sank down on the softest bed she had ever been in.

"What?" Miranda mumbled, her lips hungrily devouring Andrea's neck.

"That your sheets were silk," Andrea grinned.

"They're Mulberry silk," Miranda said a bit smugly. "They're the highest quality one can purchase."

Andrea rolled her eyes affectionately and pulled the white-haired woman back down to her lips. _Stop. Stop._ Andrea tried to obey the voice that shouted at her to stop, but she couldn't. Miranda was consuming her-both body and soul. She was vulnerable, and she needed to _feel_.

"My God Miranda," Andrea panted.

Miranda grinned against Andrea's sweaty neck and raised her hands up to cup Andrea's neck, but froze when her palm felt a bump. Andrea tensed.

"What is this?"

"Just a bump," Andrea was mentally freaking out, but her voice was strong. "I bumped the back of my neck while fixing my sink a couple of days ago. It's nothing. Really."

"Alright," Miranda believed her.

She started pushing the coat off of Andrea, but stopped when Andrea placed a hand over hers. "Let me turn the lights off."

"Why?"

"The darkness enhances the senses."

Andrea hurried to turn off the lights and draw the curtains before Miranda could protest. Blindly feeling her way in the darkness, she felt the edge of the bed and caught her breath when she felt Miranda's naked flesh. Miranda had disrobed in her absence. Andrea's jaw dropped and she hurried to shuck her own clothes. Soon, they slid together, both sighing when their naked bodies touched for the first time. Andrea ended up on the bottom, and her eyes had adjusted to the darkness so she could make out Miranda's face. She hungrily sought out the older woman's lips again, wrapping her arms around Miranda's back and pressing their breasts together. Their legs intertwined and they could feel the heat emanating from each other's cores.

"I. Missed. You. So. Much," Miranda whispered between kisses. Having the lights off bothered her slightly, since she wanted to see Andrea fully, but at the same time, the brunette was right. The darkness almost made her feel animalistic. She wanted to devour the brunette whole. "You know, during the movie, when that _man_ touched you in that manner and _entered_ you, I wanted to kill him."

"I did too," Andrea breathed. "He kissed my neck, and his breath was too hot and I could feel his-"

Miranda growled and reached around her back to grab Andrea's hands. Forcefully pushing them above Andrea's head, she snarled, "You are mine now." She failed to notice Andrea's moan of pain, mistaking it for a moan of pleasure.

Miranda roughly captured her lips and ground her lower half onto Andrea's leg. With a surprising show of strength, Andrea flipped Miranda over so she was on top. Not wasting any time, Andrea began sucking and nipping at the pale flesh of Miranda's neck and collarbones. Low moans filled the room, and when Andrea took an erect nipple in her hot mouth, Miranda made a strangled sort of scream and pushed her chest out. Andrea swirled the bud in her mouth, coating it with her tongues wetness while pinching Miranda's other nipple so it wouldn't feel neglected. She made no sound except for the occasional slurping noises. Miranda, on the other hand, felt as if she died and went to heaven. Andrea's wonderfully wicked mouth had her as tense as a bow-string. As Andrea moved lower, and finally captured her sex with a wet mouth, Miranda let out a scream. Andrea worked her tongue and lips over Miranda's core quickly, knowing the places that brought the most pleasure. Soon, Miranda had her first climax, followed quickly by a second and a third as Andrea added her fingers to the mix. Miranda weakly pushed her away finally when she could take no more. As Miranda laid panting in the darkness, she felt Andrea shift to move up to lay by her.

"That was marvelous," Miranda got out between labored breaths.

"Mmm," Andrea hummed in agreement, a terrible ache resting in her chest.

"Your turn," Miranda said coquettishly.

Before Andrea could protest, Miranda had pined her beneath herself again. And she attacked. Andrea could hardly remember all the wonderful things Miranda did to her body. It was rough and fast, yet done with a tender love Andrea somehow knew was there. There was no pain-the pleasure filled her so much, there was no room for it. Yet she knew their rough lovemaking would leave its mark in the morning. Hell, it probably left its mark now, but Andrea couldn't care less in the heat of the moment. After their last orgasm together-was it their fifth? Sixth?-they curled up together. Leaning in for one last kiss, Miranda sighed happily and almost too weak to say anything else, she flopped ungraciously back down on the soft sheets and promptly fell asleep. Andrea, consumed with guilt and sadness, stayed awake absentmindedly tracing Miranda's features in the dark.

"There are dreams that cannot be," Andrea bitterly muttered, thinking it was ironic.

She dozed off and on, sleeping fitfully and restlessly. Opening her eyes for about the 10th time that night, Andrea saw that the clock read 5:45 am. The early morning light peered through the cracks around the closed curtains, and Andrea knew that Miranda would be up soon. Andrea sighed and tears leaked out when she watched the beauty sleep peacefully next to her.

"Why did I give in?" Andrea moaned.

Swinging her long slender legs over the edge of the bed, she shakily stood up and winced in pain. Looking down at her bare body, Andrea noticed the expanse of bruises littering the length of her body.

"Well shit."

Andrea rushed to pick up her clothes and haphazardly got dressed. After shoving her phone in her jeans pocket and double checking Miranda's floor for anything she might have missed, she tip-toed back to Miranda's side and brushed a lock of snowy hair away from the beautiful, serene face. Andrea kissed Miranda's forehead, letting her lips rest against the smooth skin before whimpering and scampering to the door. Debating against leaving a note, Andrea let out a sob and her fist flew up to muffle the sorrowful sound. Barely being able to see through her tears, Andrea took one last gaze at the woman she loved before turning away and shutting the door with an inaudible click.


	7. Chapter 7

**Thanks everyone. I really appreciate your continuous support! This chapter was hard for me to write, since it deals with a tough topic, but I hope that it is real and accurate in the information. It could be emotional triggering.**

Before Miranda even woke up, she knew the brunette was gone. The sheets beside her were still warm, yet empty. A spark of hope remained that Andrea would be downstairs, fixing her coffee, but somehow, Miranda knew that it was a futile desire. She remained in bed with her eyes shut, trying to sate the indescribable ache in her heart.

"Oh Andrea," she whispered and rolled over with her hand pressed tightly against her breast.

* * *

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lily asked, glancing over to her best friend as she drove.

"No," Andrea bit her lip and stared out the window.

"Alright," Lily let the subject drop.

Something was terribly wrong with the brunette, and although she was incredibly concerned, she didn't want to push it. The drive was quiet and terse, since Lily didn't know what to say to make her friend feel better. Andrea looked like crap when Lily pulled up in front of her apartment earlier that morning. Her eyes were red-rimmed, she didn't have any makeup on, and her clothes were thrown on haphazardly. Andrea barely muttered a 'hi' before she completely shut down and curled up with her back facing Lily.

_Why did I do it? Why?_ were the only thoughts running through Andrea's mind as she stared at the snowy world of New York pass by.

"Hey, we're here," Lily said gently, rousing Andrea from her desolate thoughts.

"Right," Andrea mumbled, unbuckling her seatbelt.

Lily sighed and got out of her car and locked it after making sure Andrea was out. They made their way towards the Memorial Sloan-Kettering Cancer Center's entrance. Before entering though, Andrea grabbed Lily's arm.

"Hey, thank you for taking me," Andrea's large brown eyes searched Lily's, "I'm sorry for my mood. I just want you to know that I'm incredibly grateful."

"Of course honey," Lily gently squeezed Andrea's arm, mindful of her easy bruising. "I'm always here for you."

"I can't tell you how much that means to me," Andrea smiled through her watery eyes. She sniffed and wiped them away quickly. "Ready?"

Lily didn't respond. She linked her arm with Andrea's, giving her both physical and emotional support the brunette needed.

* * *

Through a hazy fog, Miranda walked to her kitchen, sliding an earring in as she pondered Andrea's absence. Steeling her heart, she opened her enormous fridge and stared at its contents. Nothing looked good. Angrily, she whipped out her iPhone and dialed a number.

"Hello? Miranda?"

"Andre-" Miranda choked over the name, "Get me coffee. I will be in the office in twenty minutes. That's all."

She hung up on her tired assistant and rubbed her temples. Why had she slept with the silly girl? She had pushed too far, but Andrea seemed willing. She hadn't...raped her, had she? Miranda gasped aloud. Wait. Andrea had wanted to! She had initiated some contact...right? Miranda growled. Never in her life had she been so happy to slide into her comfy Mercedes Benz and drive away to a life where she could hide behind her icy mask.

* * *

Andrea laid on her side with a blue cloth draped over her body. She had gotten her blood pressure and heart taken, along with her weight, height, and other various necessities. The anesthesia had been administered, and now Andrea couldn't feel anything in her hip area. '_Too bad that it didn't take away the pain in my heart,'_ Andrea thought cynically.

"Can you feel this?" a doctor asked and pressed his fingers against the top ridge on the back of her hipbone.

"No," Andrea replied shortly.

"Alright, we're going to insert a needle in your hip, and you might feel some discomfort. When we pull some of the bone marrow out though, you will feel a brief sharp pain or stinging. Don't hesitate to cry or scream or whatever you need to do to alleviate your pain," the doctor explained.

"Mmkay," Andrea grunted.

"Here we go."

The doctor was right. Andrea couldn't tell when he put the hollow needle in her hip, but when he injected the syringe into her bone marrow and pulled back on the plunger, it hurt like hell. She inhaled sharply and squeezed her eyes tightly. Her hands fumbled to grasp something she could grip onto, and her trembling fingers found the edge of the table she was on. As Andrea clutched it tightly, the doctor drew a sample of the liquid portion of the bone marrow into the needle and pulled the needle back out. A blonde nurse applied pressure on the site where Andrea was bleeding while the doctor emptied the needle into a tube.

"We need a couple more samples," the doctor said. "But you're doing great. Is there anything we can get you?"

"No, thank you," Andrea said through gritted teeth.

The second sample hurt less, since Andrea's mind and heart wandered back to Miranda, so her emotional pain was greater than her physical discomfort. And during the third sample, her mind had numbed her body enough, she could barely feel a thing.

"Great job," the doctor said in a comforting tone. "Amy here," he gestured to the nurse, "is going to apply pressure to your hip for about 10-15 minutes, and then she will put a bandage on it. You can go home after that. Do you have a ride since you were under anesthesia?"

"Yes I do," Andrea replied.

"Okay, the biopsy results should be in a few days. In the meantime, just go around your normal activity as soon as you feel up to it. You will have tenderness for a week or more, so take tylenol for the pain as needed. I see that you had the lump on your neck tested as well," the doctor said, checking his sheets.

"I did," Andrea swallowed. "I also had my blood drawn, and both came up positive for lymphoma."

"This bone marrow biopsy should give you a diagnosis for what stage you are in and the options you have," the doctor adjusted his glasses. "Keep your chin up and stay strong."

"Thank you doctor," Andrea gave him one of her best smiles, although she was feeling god-awful.

He blushed, nodded once, and exited the room.

"Just tell me if I'm hurting you honey," Amy cooed in an annoying voice as she pressed firmly down on the cloth.

Andrea didn't reply, for the throbbing ache in her hip would never hold a candle to the pain in her heart.

* * *

Miranda's sharp eyes scanned over the new layout, and she clucked her tongue disapprovingly. She was sitting in a business meeting with a bunch of imbeciles, had a splitting headache, and was in the worst mood possible.

"My my, are there no more new ideas?" Miranda said in a silky voice. "I thought I hired the best."

"We thought that along with the spread for Andrea Sachs we could put a spread for other things that are receiving Oscar buzz," Emily spoke up.

"No," Miranda said shortly.

"Well how about fur?" Emily timidly tried again.

"Fur? For winter?" she fixed Emily with an ice cold glare that made the redhead wilt. Before Miranda could make her ex-assistant cry, Nigel quickly intervened.

"How about we take a break," Nigel glanced quickly at Miranda who pursed her lips, "and reconvene in about 20 minutes?"

Everyone all but bolted for the door, leaving the bald-headed Design Editor alone with the Devil.

"Miranda, what's wrong?" Nigel rubbed his forehead. "You've shot down every single idea that anyone has suggested. Some of them weren't even bad."

"No one had any good ideas," Miranda bit out. "And did you hear Emily's? Fur?"

"We both know that you would have approved Jocelyn's idea with the concept of global warming affecting New York," Nigel said, "even if you didn't like Emily's. So I will ask again. What's wrong?"

Miranda swiveled her chair so she was facing away from him. "I slept with her," she murmured so quietly Nigel almost didn't hear her.

Nigel did a double take. "What?"

"You heard me."

He took off his glasses and nervously wiped them clean on his shirt. "S-six?" he stammered. "My God Miranda. I knew I was teasing her yesterday, but I didn't know she would take my ridicule seriously."

"Excuse me?" Miranda rotated her chair so fast, Nigel thought it was a miracle that her head didn't pop off.

"Um," he said meekly. "I may have _insinuated_ that something was going on between you two."

"So she didn't even want to," Miranda mumbled more to herself than Nigel.

"No! I didn't say that," Nigel's forehead creased. "Andy _wanted_ to. She confessed, and I made it worse by teasing her relentlessly about it. Apparently she took my advice the right way and decided to go for it."

"What kind of '_advice'_ did you give her?" Miranda practically hissed between her teeth.

"I didn't really say anything," Nigel held up his hands in mock surrender. "All I told her was that a certain Editor may have the same feelings for her."

Miranda flopped ungraciously back on her chair and rubbed her tired eyes. The unexpected change in her demeanor startled Nigel. Instead of the strong, independent fashion icon Nigel had known for the last 10 years, a tired woman with a broken heart was left in her wake.

"Well after we...uh," she turned red, "_explored_ our feelings, she left me high and dry this morning. I feel like a fool. I practically groveled at her feet to give us a chance, and then, after I had laid my heart out on the line, she left me." Miranda just couldn't bring herself to speak _her_ name. It hurt too much. "I thought we were perfect for each other," she breathed out.

"And she left? Just like that?" Nigel rested his forearm on the table and bent his arm at the elbow to rest his chin in his palm. "That doesn't sound like Andy."

"Well apparently she had a change of heart," Miranda sniffed, trying to appear aloof.

"No, something probably happened," Nigel tried to reason.

"Like what?"

"I don't know," he said helplessly. "Maybe she had a family emergency? Or one of her friends had an emergency? Or maybe she forgot that her iron was on and she wanted to rush back before it burned her apartment down?"

"Those are the worst suggestions I have ever heard," Miranda said, torn between laughing and crying. "Besides, she didn't even leave a note. She hasn't called. She hasn't emailed."

"Have you reached out to her?" Nigel asked.

"No," Miranda admitted. She played with the bracelets on her wrist. "It...hurts too much. What if she rejects me? I won't be able to survive."

"You deserve to know the truth," Nigel pushed. "Whether it may be that she _did_ have an emergency to attend to, or whether she just left because she's a-"

"Don't finish that sentence," Miranda's eyes flashed dangerously.

Gulping, Nigel continued, "Sorry. I meant if she does not share your affections, then you will know for certain."

Miranda didn't respond for a long time. Nigel awkwardly fiddled with his multiple rings as he waited nervously for her response.

"Cancel the meeting," Miranda finally said softly. "Tell Jocelyn that her idea about global warming is fine for the upcoming issue. She will make the acceptable arrangements."

"Okay," Nigel pushed back his chair and stood up.

Making his way over to the door, he paused when he heard Miranda mumble something.

"Pardon?" he asked with his hand on the door handle.

"Thank you," Miranda said quietly.

Nigel just nodded and slipped out the door. As soon as he was gone, Miranda dialed a number she knew by heart and prayed for the best.

* * *

Andrea grimaced as she slowly hobbled to her kitchen chair. She was leaning heavily on Lily, and they both were panting and sweating from the exertion it took to get out of the car, walk to the door of Andrea's apartment, and climb the stairs.

"Easy does it!" Lily cautioned as she gently lowered the injured brunette onto the chair.

"Whew, thanks," Andrea breathed heavily as she collapsed onto the seat.

"No problem. Do you need anything?" Lily asked.

"Mmm, no thanks," Andrea winced as she shifted in her chair.

"Are you sure?" Lily prodded. "How about some lunch? I can run down to Subway or something and get you a sandwich if you're hungry."

"Are _you_ sure?" Andrea raised an eyebrow.

"Of course! I know you probably want your usual," Lily grabbed Andrea's apartment keys and opened the door again. "Ciao! I'll be right back."

She left before Andrea could get a word in edgewise. Chuckling at her friend's thoughtfulness, Andrea found her thoughts once again returning to Miranda. She sighed in frustration, anger, and helplessness.

_Ring. Ring._

Startled out of her musings, Andrea jumped slightly and fumbled around in her pants pocket for her cell phone. Not bothering to check the id, she flipped it open.

"Hello?" she said breathlessly.

"Andrea," came that cool and slick voice that Andrea so desperately craved and feared.

"M-miranda," she squeaked.

"I do believe that you left rather abruptly this morning," Miranda's voice shook a little at the end, but she pushed on. "Might I have an explanation why?"

_'She gets straight to the point,' _Andrea thought as she panicked trying to think of an explanation.

"Uh..." she trailed off.

"Always so eloquent," Andrea could practically _feel_ Miranda rolling her eyes. "I need to know something Andrea."

"Yes?" she gulped.

"Do you or don't you have feelings for me?" Miranda held her breath.

Andrea made the hardest decision of her life in about two seconds. "No. I do not have feelings for you." As soon as she said the dreaded words, her throat seemed to close up and her tear ducts prickled.

She heard Miranda inhale sharply and then in a cold and icy tone, she said, "I see. I hope I was a good fuck. Good bye Andrea."

And Andrea was left frozen in shock at her kitchen counter, listening to a dead end.

* * *

Miranda stormed out of her office and barely paused at her assistant's desk to rattle off her instructions. "If Roy is not here in 5 minutes, you both will be jobless. When you bring the Book tonight, leave Andrea Sach's photos on the printer. Do not bring them with you. Call my ex-husband and tell him I changed my mind-I want the twins with me for this weekend. That's all."

While the poor assistant was struggling to remember everything, the Editor snatched her coat and purse and strode angrily down the hallway to the elevators. Once she was in the privacy and comfort of the elevator, she allowed herself to weep a few tears before wiping them away determinedly and shoving her Prada sunglasses on her face. Wrapping her coat tightly around her-almost like a shield-she marched out of the doors of Elias-Clarke and into the warmth of her Mercedes where Roy was dutifully waiting for her.

When Miranda arrived at her home, she shrugged off her coat, dumped her purse in a chair, and walked furiously to her kitchen. Pouring herself a large glass of gin, she added vermouth, pinched the bridge of her nose, and took a big swig of the nasty-tasting drink. She shuddered as the hard liquor slid down her throat. Pausing to cough violently, Miranda repeated the action twice before backing off. After all, her girls were coming, and it would be unfit to have an intoxicated mother.

* * *

When Lily returned, she found Andrea in the same exact position she had left her, although this time, the brunette's eyes were wide in shock, and her mouth was slightly parted. Dropping the Subway bag on the floor, Lily hurried to her friend and embraced her. That seemed to turn Andrea's waterworks on.

"S-s-she deserves so much better than me!" Andrea blubbered. "It's not fair to her if I try and pursue anything. It's just not fair."

"I know honey," Lily murmured soothingly into Andrea's ear. "Shh, it's going to be alright."

"It's not fair. It's not fair," Andrea kept repeating.

"Shh," Lily placed a kiss at the crown of Andrea's forehead and stroked her hair. "You're going to be fine. Everything will turn out for the better."

"I'm going to die," Andrea whispered. "I can't be in a relationship with her. It's just not fair."

"Honey, don't say that. You are strong. You are going to make it," Lily's eyes filled with tears and her body shook with silent sobs.

She didn't even question who 'she' was. Much like Nigel, they both knew exactly who their anguished friends were talking about. All Lily could do was hold her best friend gently and breathe soothing words of comfort into her ear. After Andrea's twitches and shudders subsided, Lily tenderly disentangled herself.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Lily asked.

Andrea looked down, hiding her puffy, red eyes. "I'm not sure if I can."

"Does this have something to do with Miranda?"

Bursting into fresh sobs, Andrea responded, "It has everything to do with Miranda."

And so she relayed the past two days to Lily.

"I left her Lil," Andrea sniffed. "Without a note, without anything."

"Why don't you just tell her the truth?" Lily asked.

"I have cancer," Andrea wiped her eyes. "She shouldn't have to go through that. You shouldn't have to go through that."

Lily's own heart was breaking at her friend's attempt to save the woman she loved from getting hurt. "Andy, I love you. I'm your best friend. Of course I'm going to stand by you and support you during this time of crisis! And if Miranda loves you too," she pushed on, despite Andrea's gasp of shock, "I'm 100% positive that she will support you too."

"What if I die?" Andrea said hollowly. "Then what? What's going to happen to her? What's going to happen to you?"

"We will mourn and grieve, but ultimately, we will be thankful that we got to spend the last years of your life with you. You are so special Andy, and I am honored to have a friend like you," Lily spoke with feeling and soon both friends were sobbing again.

"I can't talk to her now though," Andrea cried. "She just accused me of sleeping with her because she was a 'good fuck'. How am I going to tell her? I can't just pick up the phone and say, 'Oh hi Miranda. I love you, and I'm extremely sorry, but I have cancer. That's why I made love with you and left you. Sorry!'"

"You deserve happiness Andrea Sachs," Lily gently squeezed Andrea's arm.

Leaving her hand on the pale arm, Lily cried along with her best friend at the unfairness of it all. The sandwiches lay forgotten as the two women shared their pain.


	8. Chapter 8

**Thanks everyone! I'm so sorry it took me so long to update! I've been super busy, plus I hit a tad of writer's block. ****:( Anyways...hope you guys like it! (PS. Andrea's dress she wears to the Oscars is the one that Anne Hathaway wore to the premiere of the Dark Knight Rises!)**

It was times like these when Andrea wished her parents were alive more than anything else in the world. They had passed away two years ago, after a drunk driver hit them. Andrea, who was in between two unstable jobs, had dropped everything to attend her parent's funeral, as well as oversee their burial arrangements. It was lucky that her parents were well-liked, as Andrea could barely afford to pay for the funeral. She had felt humiliated and somewhat angry that she couldn't pay her parents that simple respect, but the groups, church, and activities Mr. and Mrs. Sachs were in, all helped her realize that she was honoring them by living life to its fullest every day. She had taken their kind words to heart, and tried her hardest to work harder and live happier after she returned to New York. Andrea had let go of the anger and hatred she felt towards Miranda after learning she had blacklisted her from every publishing company, and continued with her life. She had met Tom Hooper by chance-something she believed that, silly as it may be, her parents had a role in.

Now, as the weeks drudged by, Andrea felt the absence of her family cut into her like a knife. She had received her results from the bone marrow, and after she read the contents, she couldn't even shed a tear. Lily had been there with her, and took the paper from her shaking hands, reading the results herself. After she had read the verdict, she had burst into tears and begged Andrea to get chemo, something Andrea had refused, being firmly adamant on. Lily had begged, pleaded, and even shouted at her best friend to talk to the doctor, but it had all been in vain. The brunette heard nothing. Her mind was made up, and she wasn't going to change it.

To add onto that, Andrea missed Miranda desperately. She missed the Editor's wit, her soft voice, and the iconic hair. She missed seeing Miranda; missed seeing the usual stoic face break into a soft smile once in a rare moon. Andrea was spiraling into a hole, and she couldn't get out. Most nights, she bundled up in blankets and scarves, and pushed herself to climb up the four flights of stairs it took to get to the roof of her apartment building. There, she sat in the cold January air of the New York night and looked up at the stars, imagining perfect scenarios where Miranda was her lover, and her body was healthy and cancer-free. She would talk to the stars, imagining that they were her mom and dad, and told the stars everything. Then, she would just simply sit and absorb the sounds of the busy New York traffic, looking at the clouds her breath made, and imagine Miranda was by her side. Andrea felt scared, tense, and so very alone.

* * *

Runway, for the most part, was a nightmare. Miranda was an absolute terror to anyone and everyone in the building, and the whole entire staff tried to avoid her-especially Nigel. Out of everyone, he was the one who received the full brunt of her sadness, anger, and embarrassment-mostly because he was the one who convinced her there could still be a chance for both her and Andrea. After several attempts at trying to contact the evasive brunette, Miranda finally stopped trying. Her heart was shattered, and she didn't know how to handle her anguish. Andrea had sparked something deep within her, and she couldn't bear it that the brunette had left so suddenly. She had never experienced anything like it before.

To make matters worse, Miranda had to oversee every detail of the Andrea Sachs photo spread, since the issue was due to come out the week before the Oscars. The photos of her love seemed to taunt her...especially the one where she was bare except for her strategically-placed arms. Once, they had made her so upset, she outright refused to look at them, snapping at Nigel to fix everything and expected him to turn the issue into perfection. It just hurt too much for her to be so hands-on like she usually was with every one of the previous 103 issues she had made.

Caroline and Cassidy had been very supportive, knowing instinctively that something bad had happened to their mother. They had been very sweet to her, asking how her day was, cooking dinner for her, and generally being more talkative and open. Miranda had been pleasantly surprised to find that her beautiful children were so thoughtful, yet still remained sad. Andrea had left a void, and nobody else could fill it.

* * *

Finally, the week of February 24th had come, announcing the arrival of the Oscars. Andrea flew to California, her only carry-on being her dress. She wasn't planning on going to any after parties, nor spending any extra time in California. Andrea arrived to the Theatre fashionably late, but she was in a haze. She was extremely tired and felt incredibly weak, both mentally and physically. Her cancer over the past couple of weeks had really taken its toll on the actress, but she hid it well. Andrea put on her brightest smile before stepping out of the limo, and the world finally feasted its eyes on the new, elusive young actress. The cameras loved her. The white fabric of the Prabal Gurung dress she wore draped loosely over her thin frame, creating the illusion that she was stronger and curvier than she actually was. Her gown had a peplum with a plunging neckline that exposed a glittering corset. The back was a loose draped cowl that showed off an expanse of pale skin. Skipping expensive jewelry, she wore a pair of simple diamond-stud earrings and a small silver bracelet. Her short pixie-cut hair was side-swept and light mascara, eyeliner, and pink lipstick on her plump lips finished off her demure look.

Still not used to all of the flashing cameras and her named being screamed by thousands, Andrea shyly averted her eyes from most of the flashes and tried to walk into the Dolby Theatre without incident.

* * *

Thousands of miles away, the Priestly family was watching the arrivals of the Oscars on their huge television screen. One set of crystal blue eyes were glued to the screen, desperate for even a glimpse of a certain brunette. The program they were watching only showed interviews of the actors and actresses, not the arrivals or the red carpet as a whole. Therefore, Miranda only prayed that Andrea would be subject to an interview. Twenty minutes in, and Andrea still hadn't appeared.

"Maybe she's not even there yet," Caroline tried to placate her mom, sensing the stress that seemed to roll off the Editor's shoulders in waves.

"Maybe," Miranda said absentmindedly.

Another twenty minutes passed, leaving Miranda more agitated and annoyed in its wake. Finally, Caroline spotted her.

"Look! There she is!" Caroline shouted and jabbed at her finger at the screen.

"Caroline! Do not poke the screen, you will break the thousands of lights in the screen," Miranda scolded before realizing what her daughter had said. She craned her neck nonchalantly and tried to get a good look at the screen.

Sure enough, Andrea was walking (more like gliding in Miranda's love-sick mind) down the red carpet in the background with a timid, yet pretty smile on her face. Miranda's sharp eyes quickly scanned the thin frame, assessing the dress and color. She gave a nod almost indistinguishably and allowed herself a small smile, even though seeing the brunette again drove a thousand more knives in her heart. A thousand more dug into her heart after she saw Andrea breeze past the interviewer and into the Theatre, vanishing from view.

"Well that was rude," Cassidy remarked.

"Yeah, she could have at least given _one_ interview!" Caroline pouted.

"Girls, I'm sure Andrea has her own reasons," Miranda said through pursed lips, keeping her eyes focused on the television, which was currently showing an ad for Pantene. She was secretly deflated though, having to have wanted to hear the woman's voice she missed talk for the first time in weeks. Rubbing her eyes, she got up off the couch and went to the kitchen to pour herself a glass of expensive wine.

* * *

Andrea blew out a breath when she got past all of the interviewers without trouble, and quickly found her seat in the front next to Hugh Jackman and his wife. She spent her time chatting with them, and finally, the Oscars started. Seth McFarlane was pretty witty, and Andrea began to feel relaxed with each giggle she emitted at the comedian's jokes. There were thirteen categories before Best Supporting Actress was announced, and Andrea felt her nerves finally start to take control of her body and mind. Up to that point, she had felt no excitement, stress, or worry. Maybe it was because she finally relaxed, so her emotions had a chance to show themselves, or maybe it was because she had finally stopped thinking about Miranda, but whatever the reason, Andrea felt her palms start to sweat. During the commercial break before her category was announced, Andrea quietly slipped away to the bathroom to calm herself down. She desperately wanted to splash water on her face, but knew her makeup would be ruined if she dared. Suddenly, she felt a sharp pain pierce through her stomach. Gasping, she clutched at her stomach frantically and willed the pain away.

"Please please please, not now," she chanted under her breath.

A toilet flushed and a blonde, whom Andrea presumed to be a seat filler, walked out. Andrea struggled to compose herself, and somewhat awkwardly leaned on the counter, still clutching her midsection.

"Hey, you're Andrea Sachs, right?" the woman asked, as she started washing her hands.

"Yes I am," Andrea tried to smile, but another jolt of pain stabbed its way through her stomach.

"Are you alright?" the blonde asked, her voice filled with concern.

"Yes, I probably just ate something that didn't agree with me," Andrea lied.

"Oh, well I hope you feel better. You'd better get out there...they're presenting the award for Best Supporting Actress next!" the young woman chirped and threw the paper towel she used to dry her hands off in the trash can. She walked to the door, pulled it open, and before she left, she looked back at Andrea and said shyly, "I hope you'll win it. I really like you."

"Thank you so much," Andrea gave her a bright smile.

With a nod, the woman left. Andrea braced her hands on the counter and closed her eyes as she took deep breaths, willing the pain in her belly away. "Okay. Showtime," Andrea said after a few seconds of meditating. She looked up at her reflection, flashed herself her best smile, and strode confidently out the door and back to her seat.

* * *

As Christopher Plummer ambled out on stage, Miranda could feel her heartbeat increase. This was it. She desperately hoped Andrea would win. Unconsciously, she tightened her hands into fists, her eyes never straying from her television. Andrea's face popped up on the screen after Christopher Plummer announced her name for a nominee, and Miranda could tell something was not right. Andrea looked a little more pale than she usually was, and although she smiled for the camera, her large eyes were filled with pain. Miranda wished she could be there, providing comfort and support for the young brunette, but Andrea had made it perfectly clear that she wanted nothing to do with Miranda. All the Editor could do was sit and watch, her whole body tense with anticipation.

Christopher Plummer opened the envelope impossibly slow, making Miranda grit her teeth with frustration. Finally, he grinned and read, "And the Oscar goes to...Andrea Sachs for Les Misérables."

"Yes!" Cassidy punched the air victoriously.

Miranda smiled at her daughter's actions and watched as Andrea's eyes opened wide and her jaw dropped. Hugh Jackman gave her a huge hug and a kiss, sending a stab of jealousy through Miranda. The other actresses who were nominated applauded for Andrea, grins on all of their faces. None of them seemed that 'put out' by losing to a newcomer in the business. Andrea stumbled up the flight of stairs and enveloped Christopher Plummer in a hug before wiping her eyes and receiving the Oscar. Clutching the Oscar tightly, she looked out over the sea of famous legends, and began her speech.

"Wow," she started nervously, and giggled, making everyone in the audience chuckle along with her. "Um, I just really want to say thank you to everyone. Especially Hugh Jackman, since he was incredibly helpful to me, being new to this and all." The camera flashed to the actor, and he gave her a beaming smile. "Thank you to the um, Academy. I would like to thank Tom Hooper, for giving me the chance to play the part of a lifetime. And the cast and crew, I share this with all of you. Everyone was so incredibly supportive and-" she cut off, clutching her stomach. Miranda gasped in alarm, but Andrea recovered quickly and chuckled weakly, "I think it was just too much stress on an empty stomach." The audience murmured their approval, and Andrea continued. "I would like to thank my parents, God bless their souls-"

"Andy's parents are dead?" Caroline's jaw dropped.

"It appears so," Miranda frowned. Andrea hadn't mentioned that little detail in their conversations.

"That's terrible!" Caroline gasped.

"Shut up, she's still talking!" Cassidy jabbed her sister with her elbow, eliciting an angry protest from Caroline.

"Cassidy, do not provoke your sister. Quiet now," Miranda said sternly, making her children nod meekly and return their attention to the screen where they had missed a good chunk of Andrea's speech.

"...And I would like to thank my former employee, Miranda Priestly," Andrea glanced at the ground before tilting her head back up and looking bravely in the camera. "She helped me a lot, and I would just like to take this opportunity to tell her how much she means to me. So thank you Miranda. And thank you everyone, for this incredible honor." She nodded with a smile on her face and exited the stage as the audience erupted into applause for the talented new actress.

The silence in Miranda Priestly's household was deafening. The twins' mouths were hanging slightly open and they both turned to their mother, who was staring at the television as if it told her Jacqueline Follet had taken over her job at Runway. Neither twin dared break the silence, since Miranda looked like she was either going to scream, cry, or laugh.

Miranda's head was swimming. She honestly didn't know what to feel. Rage was the most prominent emotion that flashed through her body. How dare that insolent girl mock her in such a way? She could feel her breathing getting heavier and her eyes turning into slits.

"Um Mom?" Caroline, the braver of the two twins, cautiously placed her hand on Miranda's arm.

"What?" Miranda snapped, snatching her arm away quickly.

"I was just wondering if you were okay," she said weakly, hurt from her mom's actions.

"Oh baby, I'm sorry," Miranda softened when she saw her daughter's expression. "I was just...surprised by Andrea's confession."

"I don't think she meant it to mean anything except a genuine thank you," Caroline said, looking confused.

_Oh but she did. She used me, and now she's using the Oscars to really drive her point home. _"Perhaps," was all Miranda said, feigning disinterest.

Caroline shrugged and turned her attention back to the screen. Miranda closed her eyes and breathed deeply to calm her jumbled emotions. The next portion of the Oscars was uneventful, ranging from 10 minute long Oscar speeches to 2 minute acceptance speeches. Miranda didn't remember any of it, since she was so focused on calming her shattered heart and mending her broken emotions. Finally, Seth McFarlane announced that the Best Actress was going to sing, and Miranda snapped out of it.

The screen turned black, and the chilling intro of the famous melody began. A soft light shone down on the skeleton-like figure and Miranda couldn't help but feel concerned for the brunette's well-being. Andrea was sitting on a prop that wasn't visible through the dark veil that shrouded the stage. The soft violins led into the entrance, and Andrea opened her mouth to sing.

_I dreamed a dream in time gone by  
_

Again, Miranda was transported to the first time she heard the chilling song, and goosebumps rose on her neck.

_When hope was high and life worth living_

Andrea paused and looked at the ground, biting her lip. Her damned cancer ruined everything.

_I dreamed that love would never die_  
_I dreamed that God would be forgiving  
_

Andrea's large brown eyes bore into the camera, pleading with the one person she knew she had to apologize to. Finally, having a real personal connection to the song helped her sing it exactly how she wanted it to sound.

___Then I was young and unafraid  
__And dreams were made and used and wasted  
__There was no ransom to be paid  
__No song unsung, no wine untasted____  
_

Miranda was blown away. There was just something incredibly special to this version. Perhaps it was the ambiance, or perhaps it was the extra feeling Andrea sang with. Whatever the cause, Miranda knew it was one of the most beautiful things she had ever heard.

_But the tigers come at night_  
_With their voices soft as thunder_  
_As they tear your hope apart_  
_As they turn your dream to shame_

Andrea's eyes welled up with tears. There wasn't a dry eye in the theatre. The brunette somehow projected her own pain and loneliness onto the audience.

_And still I dream she'll come to me_  
_That we will live the years together_

Miranda gasped when she heard the intentional changed word. There wasn't anybody else the brunette could be referring to...right? Maybe this was Andrea's apology.

_But there are dreams that cannot be_  
_And there are storms we cannot weather_

So something incredibly drastic had happened to Andrea. Something so drastic, that it caused her to give up being in a relationship with Miranda. What had the brunette said? '"_I can't explain...I'm sorry. I can promise you that you will only get hurt. I'm better off alone._'" So she had warned her. Miranda was just too caught up in her own affections, she didn't pay attention to the younger woman's pleadings. _Now_ Miranda's emotions were spiraling out of control, and there wasn't a damned thing she could do to stop them.

_I had a dream my life would be_  
_So different from this hell I'm living_  
_So different now from what it seemed_

Andrea's voice dropped into a whisper, and the lights dimmed as her voice grew weaker.

_Now life has killed the dream I dreamed_

The stage was dark again, and when the lights came on again, Andrea was gone, and everybody was standing up, their hands in the air as a silent applause. What no one realized is that when the lights went dark, two stagehands had to rush out and drag the unconscious brunette off the stage.

* * *

**The next day**

After Andrea had brushed her fainting off as a combination of nerves, excitement, and the stress of performing her heart wrenching song, the paramedics let her go reluctantly. Andrea still didn't know how she got away without her blood being drawn, or her heart-rate checked. Miracles really do happen. She caught the first available flight to New York, and quickly deported California, wanting to get home as soon as possible.

Evening came, and she found herself staring out the window as she always did at that time of day. She coughed and shivered as she looked at the sun setting. After the sun disappeared behind the horizon, Andrea made herself a cup of soup and set it on her table. Pulling out a chair, she sat down and rested her hand on the countertop, staring at the bowl. She would have cried, but she had no tears left. She would have called Lily, but she had no energy to talk to anyone. Andrea was feeling down and depressed. She was sick and tired of being sick and tired. Sighing, she forced herself to drink half of the soup and choke down a glass of milk before pushing back her chair and walking to her closet. Grabbing her trusty blankets and scarves, she wrapped them around herself and shuffled to the front door. Swinging it open, she almost screamed when she saw another person standing just outside with their fist raised.

"Miranda?!" Andrea gasped after her heart-rate slowed down.

The silver-haired Editor shifted uncomfortably before saying quietly, "Hello Andrea. I was just going to knock. May I come in or are you leaving?"

"No, you can come in," Andrea squeaked, stepping aside.

Miranda nodded her thanks and glided inside, looking oddly out of place in her Prada coat and Jimmy Choos. Seeing the half-eaten soup bowl, she raised an eyebrow and looked at Andrea questionably.

"I was going to eat it," Andrea said lamely and then coughed.

"Why aren't you eating?" Miranda saw straight through the lie. She walked over to the table and looked down at it.

"Because I'm not hungry," Andrea mumbled, fighting off another cough.

Miranda shook her head. "Don't starve yourself Andrea."

"I'm not," she shot back, wrapping the blanket around her tighter to provide comfort and protection from Miranda's questions.

"Then what is this?" the older woman asked, gesturing to the discarded dinner. The brunette stood frozen by the door and didn't respond. "Andrea," Miranda tried again, using a different, softer tone, "what's happening to you?"

Andrea's lip quivered but didn't say anything. Miranda smacked the table, making the fragile woman jump.

"God damn it Andrea. I drove all the way out here at 8 at night to finally get some answers," Miranda glared. "I would appreciate it if you would try and cooperate."

"Well nobody asked you to be here," Andrea bit out. Every fiber of her being was aching for Miranda to stay, but she couldn't risk breaking Miranda's heart when the time finally came where she would die.

Miranda stared at her, her mouth slightly agape. Gaining control of it, she snapped back, "Fine, _Andray-ah._ I guess I was a fool to think you actually meant what you sang at the Oscars. Good bye."

Andrea swayed uneasily, Miranda's words cutting into her. She knew she deserved it though. Everything was going exactly as planned. Miranda was leaving, which was a good thing. Except...fate had other plans. As Miranda started to stride angrily to the door, she hit her hip against the table, making the paper with Andrea's lymphoma results flutter to the ground. Miranda bit back a cry and bent down to pick it up, promptly freezing when the contents of the paper were revealed to her. Snatching it up, she scanned the words quickly, ignoring Andrea's protests and weak punches on her arm.

"Don't read that," Andrea cried, feebly hitting Miranda. "Please give it back. Just give it back. Please."

She collapsed in a sobbing mess, and Miranda sunk down next to her, wrapping her arms around her in a warm embrace. It was the first human contact Andrea had received in weeks, and she could feel herself melting into Miranda's strong form. Apparently Andrea's tear ducts weren't empty yet, as she poured her soul out in Miranda's neck, hiccuping and gasping for breath. She could vaguely hear Miranda's soothing voice in her ear, whispering her name over and over again. She didn't even have enough strength to wrap her arms back around Miranda. All she could do was curl up in the safe embrace that was offered to her, and trust Miranda to keep her from falling even more than she already had.


	9. Chapter 9

**Thank you so much for all of your support and reviews and PM's and everything! :)**

Miranda's hands were comforting. They were so soft, yet so strong from all the hours she spent editing as she poured her soul into the glossy pages of Runway. They stroked Andrea's hair gently, but with determination, as if Miranda was trying to wipe the cancer out of the brunette's head. Andrea allowed herself to finally absorb of all the feelings that had festered in the past couple of months, and cried her heart out, protected in the older woman's sheltering embrace. Burying her face into the side of Miranda's throat, Andrea had never felt so safe. She felt tears on the top of her head, and realized Miranda was crying as well. She attempted to look up, but Miranda held her tighter and whispered, "Don't move. I've got you." Andrea's eyes filled with more tears, and tried to bury herself further into Miranda's elegant neck. She would have wrapped her arms around Miranda and reciprocate the embrace, but the Editor was holding her in a position where it would have been awkward, so her arms were pressed tightly up against Miranda's chest. Her hands were clenched together, and she was curled in a fetal position.

The two women cried together silently, both wishing they could take the other woman's pain away. After Andrea's eyes had ran out of tears to cry, she tried to look up again, and found Miranda looking down at her with watery eyes. Andrea had never seen the beautiful woman cry since Paris. Heart threatening to break, Andrea looked up at her with eyes reflecting the pain and sadness that was present in Miranda's heart. Miranda was dumbstruck at the sight of Andrea's big brown eyes gazing into hers. Nobody had ever looked at her with such heartbreak and suffering.

"Miranda," Andrea whispered, and reached up and brushed Miranda's cheek with the back of her hand.

The older woman tilted her head onto Andrea's hand, a few tears leaking out of her crystal blue orbs. Andrea turned her hand over so that her palm was cupping Miranda's cheek, making the woman sigh and close her eyes.

"Thank you," Andrea murmured.

"For what?" Miranda replied in a husky tone, her voice hoarse from the sudden tiredness she felt from crying so much.

"For being here," Andrea sniffed and glanced down. She tried to drop her hand from Miranda's face, but Miranda was faster, and quickly reached up her own hand on top of Andrea's.

Kissing the palm, Miranda said lowly, "I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner."

"Mira," Andrea said, quickly reverting back to the nickname, "I...left you. I _used _you. How-_Why_ did you come back to me?"

Miranda interlaced her fingers with Andrea's, and looked at their joined hands before looking back at the brunette with love shining from her eyes, "Because, Andrea, I am in love with you. I knew when we...made love for the first time, but I didn't allow myself to believe that I did. I have missed you so much during the past couple of years. It was seeing Les Mis that really triggered my..._romantic_ feelings to manifest into something deeper. So much so, that I knew that I had to have you in my life again." She paused to let the brunette process her words, watching how Andrea's face suddenly sported an adorable shade of pink, her eyes looking down shyly with a smile on her face. "And then when we made love...I knew that you were the one for me. I was going to tell you that I loved you in the morning, but you had left. I remembered however, that you said that you _couldn't_ be romantically linked to me-not that you _didn't _want to. I was desperately curious, yet I pushed so hard, so technically, I was at fault."

"Miranda, stop," Andrea's eyes bore into hers pleadingly, not wanting the woman she loved to take responsibility for _her_ faults. "I'm to blame. I'm so sorry that I left. I didn't want you to find out about my cancer. I knew-well, know- that I'm going to die, and I didn't want to burden you with that information. It was the worst possible way I could have left you."

"Don't say that," Miranda felt a sob wrack her body, and she squeezed Andrea's hand tightly. "Please," her voice dropped to a whisper, "please don't say you're going to die."

"I am Miranda," Andrea averted her gaze, "I had a bone marrow test the morning I left you, and the results you read stated that I'm positive, meaning that the lymphoma has infected the bone marrow. It's high grade lymphoma-aggressive and rapidly growing. It requires intensive and immediate treatment, but it's often uncurable. I decided not to do chemo because it would be palliative, meaning it won't change the outcome or prolong it. Besides, you weren't in my life. What was there to live for?"

"Oh Andrea," Miranda tilted her young love's face up, "I wished I would have gone to the bone marrow appointment with you...I would have held you throughout the whole thing. And Andrea, I am no reason to throw your life away. I still want you to do the chemo, no matter what the chances are. I need you in my life."

"And I need you," Andrea sniffed and wrapped her arms around the older woman, "I need you because I love you too Miranda. I have since Paris...every day I didn't see you only made my affection grow stronger. I missed you too so much, it almost physically hurt me. It seemed like a cruel twist of fate when you contacted me. I had just gotten a blood test on Friday, received my results on Tuesday, and right after I learned I had lymphoma, you called me. My life turned for the better after I met you for lunch, and with the photoshoot and everything. Yet I knew I couldn't pursue anything. Even though I knew I had cancer, I didn't know my survival rate until recently, and it seemed unfair to put you through everything."

"I would have gladly gone through everything with you-doctors appointments, staying up late with you, and whatever else you needed," Miranda said, becoming weepy again. "Can't you see that? I want to cherish every moment I have with you." Pausing to wipe her eyes, she continued, "Don't shut me out. I want to help you and love you to the best of my ability. And that includes getting you to do chemo."

Andrea stiffened and backed out of Miranda's embrace quickly. "I can't Miranda. That would kill me emotionally, don't you see? Chemo won't do a thing except for make me even sicker and give me even more insomnia."

"I won't sit back and watch you kill yourself!" Miranda exclaimed, raising her voice slightly.

"I'm not killing myself," Andrea said with a hurt expression. "The cancer is."

Standing up, she cast one last sorrowful glance at the woman still sitting on the cheap wooden floorboards of her apartment, and strode over to where she dropped her blankets. Picking them up, she threw them over her shoulder and swiftly left her home. Miranda sat on the floor in shock, still trying to comprehend how everything could have gone so wrong.

* * *

After logically thinking about the places Andrea had gone, Miranda climbed up the four flights of stairs it took to get to the roof of the apartment building, praying that she was right. She had noticed the blankets the younger woman had, and quickly ruled out that she would have left her apartment building to go somewhere in the city. One reason being that Andrea seemed incredibly weak, and another reason being that she was now a celebrity, and would have been surrounded by paparazzi if she roamed the streets by herself. After Miranda had quickly clicked up the metal stairs in her high heels, she quietly opened the door to the roof, and a chilly gust of wind blow straight through her body. Shivering, she pulled her Prada coat tightly around her as her sharp eyes scanned the roof. Spotting the frail brunette wrapped tightly in her blankets, Miranda's heart broke all over again. She walked over to Andrea and sat down next to her, but didn't look at her. For a minute or two, the two women breathed out clouds of air, and listened to the busy streets of New York.

"I used to dream about you being here with me," Andrea said, breaking the silence. "On the roof I mean."

"I'm here now," Miranda said softly.

"Yes you are," Andrea looked at her and smiled her beautiful smile that Miranda loved so much.

She opened her blanket up, and motioned for Miranda to get under it. Miranda scooted over gracefully, and let her head fall on the brunette's shoulder. Andrea appreciated the heat that the older woman provided, and she wove her arms around the lithe body. She rested her cheek on Miranda's soft locks, and tightened her hold on Miranda.

"I'm sorry," Miranda said, looking at the bright lights of the taxis traveling below.

"Me too," Andrea replied, softly kissing the top of Miranda's head. "I'll do the chemo."

"Darling, it would mean the world to me," Miranda lifted her head and looked into Andrea's eyes. "I want you to have a fighting chance to survive."

"I'll give it a shot," Andrea sighed and looked up at the sky twinkling with stars. "I hope it works."

Miranda reached her bare hand up, shivering slightly when it was exposed to the windy air, and gently turned her love's face back towards herself. "It will. It has to."

"I love you Miranda," Andrea murmured.

"And I love you Andrea."

And Andrea leaned in and pressed her lips to the mouth of the woman she had missed so desperately over the past couple of months. She took her time re-familiarizing herself with Miranda's mouth, her lips tenderly brushing over the thin pink lips as her arms drew Miranda in tighter. Taxis honked, and the screech of tires could be heard every couple of minutes, but the two women were so absorbed in each other, nothing else mattered. Soon, as their kisses grew deeper, they also turned salty, as both Miranda and Andrea started crying softly. Urgently, Andrea pressed herself closer to Miranda's body, shivering when she felt Miranda's curves against her own.

Breaking the kiss, Miranda trailed her warm mouth up Andrea's cheeks, brushing her lips against the tears that were falling from the chocolate pools. Andrea closed her eyes, smiling blissfully as her heart melted at the other woman's actions. When Miranda was done, Andrea opened her eyes again and reached up with her hands to cup the beautiful face. She used her index fingers to wipe away the trail of tears that were spilling from Miranda's blue eyes, and leaned in to rest her forehead against the Editor's. They reveled in listening to each others laboured breath, as their minds and souls tried to comprehend all the feelings they were experiencing. Their emotions were a crazy mix of love, hopefulness, sadness, and heartbreak, among countless others.

"I don't want you coming out here again," Miranda whispered. "It's far too chilly."

Andrea nodded her acquiesce and drew Miranda in for another kiss. Sitting there holding Miranda in her arms, Andrea was sure that nothing felt as good as having her love back in her life, even if only for a short while.

* * *

Miranda helped Andrea hobble down the stairs to her apartment room. It was slow going, since the brunette was already very weak, and the cold winter air hadn't helped any. But Miranda loved holding Andrea in her arms. It gave her a sense of comfort, since she knew that she could protect the brunette from anything...Except for the cancer that was spreading rapidly through the young woman's body as each second passed. When they made it to Andrea's home, Miranda helped her walk to her bedroom, and shut the door behind them. Andrea fell down on her bed, exhausted, and Miranda watched her with worry evident in her red-rimmed eyes.

"Can you stay?" Andrea looked pleadingly at Miranda. "Or do the twins need you?"

"I need to go back to them," Miranda sat down on the bed next to the tired woman, and grasped two cold hands in her own, "but please come home with me. Not just today, but for the rest of our lives."

"Um..." Andrea looked at her speechless.

"Please Andrea. It would bring me peace of mind if you were safe in my house. We can sell this apartment, and you can live with me."

Andrea didn't say anything and looked at Miranda with rounded eyes, still not fully comprehending.

"Andrea, is there anything tying you here?"

She thought for a moment, and then shook her head no. Nate had left, her acting job was done, and her parents were gone. The only reason why she would stay would be because of Lily, but her friend could just come to the townhouse if she wanted to visit, right?

"Is there anything you would regret if you moved in with me?"

Again, Andrea shook her head no. The final days of her life would be spent with the woman she loved. No, there would be no regrets about living with Miranda.

"Then please, come home with me tonight," Miranda reached up and pushed back a stray piece of chocolate-colored hair. "Your hair is getting longer again," she commented arbitrarily.

Andrea grinned at that statement, and then placed a quick kiss on Miranda's lips. "I would love to. Thank you Mira."

"Thank goodness," Miranda said, closing her eyes and letting a small smile grace her lips. She stood up and helped the brunette stand shakily on her feet.

"I have to grab my stuff," Andrea said, carelessly waving her hand around her small room.

"Stuff?" Miranda raised an eyebrow, but there was a spark of humor in them. "I have everything you need at the townhouse Andrea. But if you wish to grab anything, I'll call Roy while you gather your things."

"Alright."

As Andrea shuffled around her small apartment, collecting the one thing that mattered the most to her, Miranda pulled out her phone and called Roy. When she was done, she found the brunette sitting on the edge of her bed and tracing her fingertips across a photo frame. Miranda gently sat down next to her, barely making a dent in the bed, and wrapped her arm around Andrea's waist. She kissed Andrea on the cheek and looked down at the photo of what she assumed to be Mr. and Mrs. Sachs. They were both grinning widely at the camera, their arms thrown around each other in a dance position. Discreetly looking back and forth at the picture and her young love, Miranda could easily see where Andrea had gotten her beautiful eyes and kind smile. Mrs. Sachs had the pretty doe-eyes, while Mr. Sachs had the easy-going grin.

"This is one of the few photos I have of them," Andrea said sadly, but without tears. She knew that they were in a better place, and she had already grieved for them. Of course she still missed her parents like crazy, but she could now talk about them without breaking down every time the mention of their names came up. "It's my favorite because both Mom and Dad look so happy. It was taken on one of their vacations to Italy." She smiled sadly. "They loved to travel. Mom didn't like Iowa, but since my Dad taught at Northwestern, she didn't have much choice. Dad compensated by taking her on exotic trips every year for their anniversary."

"They both look incredibly happy." Miranda reached over and traced the outline of Mrs. Sachs lightly with her fingertip. "She is beautiful, much like you."

"Thank you," Andrea rested her head on Miranda's shoulder and smiled down at her parents beaming up at her. _I wish you could have been alive to see me in love with the most beautiful, wonderful, and perfect woman._

Miranda's phone buzzed, and she unlocked her iPhone to read it. "Roy is here," she said, standing up. Andrea stood up too, and Miranda placed her hand in the middle of the young woman's back and guided the brunette to the door. Once outside in the car, Roy gave Andrea a friendly wink and smile, and opened the door for her. Blushing slightly, Andrea murmured her thanks, and climbed in before Miranda. After the Editor slid in, she motioned for the brunette to lay her head across her lap, which Andrea gratefully took advantage of. She was so tired-the cancer had made it almost impossible to sleep at night, since she was prone to night sweats, and the emotional turmoil she felt when she didn't have Miranda by her side kept her up countless hours. Yet now, in this moment laying in Miranda's lap, Andrea felt her system finally relax. Miranda's nimble fingers came to massage her scalp and run themselves through her hair, and Andrea's eyelids got heavier and heavier. All too soon, Roy had pulled up to the townhouse, and Miranda gently roused the fatigued woman. Thanking Roy, Miranda led Andrea into the warm house, and up to her bedroom. Even though she was tired, Andrea let her eyes wander over the room that she had been in just weeks prior. But this time, she wasn't going to slip away early in the morning.

"Darling, I need to go check on the twins," Miranda said in a soft tone. "They're supposed to be in bed, but I'm going to make sure that they're asleep."

"Alright," Andrea clutched the photo frame tightly.

"Go ahead and run yourself a bath," Miranda urged. "God knows you need it. Everything you need is in the bathroom. There are pajamas in the closet, so pick out anything you would like. I will join you in a while."

"Thank you Mira," Andrea leaned in and captured Miranda's lips with her own.

Miranda cupped the brunette's face with her hand and gazed at her, sending shivers down Andrea's spine when she saw the love clearly written in the clear blue eyes. Placing one last kiss on the plump lips, Miranda turned away and melted into the shadows as she glided down the darkened hallway to her daughters' rooms. Andrea watched her go with an expression of love on her face, and then reluctantly turned away to step into Miranda's extensive closet. Quickly picking out a silk tanktop and the only cotton shorts Miranda owned, she picked out La Perla underwear with a prominent blush to her cheeks. Just the thought of Miranda in those delicious items...Andrea mentally shook herself, and headed to the bathroom. She ran warm water in the jacuzzi, and stripped off all of her clothes. Searching for a bathrobe, she spotted a purple one hanging on the back of the door. Pulling it on, Andrea suddenly began to feel nervous. Her body wasn't ideal for Miranda. It was covered with bruises, the largest being the one on her hip from the bone marrow test that hadn't fully disappeared. The other marks had came from Andrea doing small things, like accidentally knocking into the table as she stumbled up to grab the phone, or from bumping into a door as she walked through it. Plus, she was skinny-bordering on skeleton skinny. It wasn't attractive at all, and Andrea suddenly felt incredibly self-conscious and embarrassed. Tying the robe tightly around her thin waist, she paced back and forth, her mind suddenly going crazy. _What if Miranda finds me ugly? I'm not beautiful enough for her. She's the most gorgeous creature on earth, and she deserves much more_ than...Andrea looked down at herself..._this_.

"Andrea?" a knock came from outside the door, and Andrea yelped.

"Um, yes?" she squeaked, trying to sound normal.

"May I come in?" Miranda's voice was laced with concern.

"Um..." Andrea's eyes wandered looking for an excuse when she noticed the bathtub almost flowing over. Letting out a shriek, she ran over to the tub and spun the knobs to shut off the flow of water.

"I'm coming in Andrea," a firmer tone made Andrea groan and drop her head onto the jacuzzi steps.

The door clicked open, and Miranda gasped. Hurrying over to the fragile body, Miranda sat down on the steps and gathered Andrea in her arms. Holding her close, Miranda asked, "Andrea, what is it?"

"I'm ugly," she whispered brokenly, once more crossing her arms over her chest in a fetal position and hiding her face in the crook of Miranda's neck. Miranda nudged Andrea's head with her nose, forcing the actress to look up at her.

"Andrea Sachs, you are the most beautiful woman I have ever seen," Miranda said firmly and looked deeply into Andrea's eyes.

"You haven't seen what the cancer has done to my body," Andrea murmured.

"It makes you even more beautiful to me," Miranda pressed her lips to Andrea's forehead. "You are so brave and strong Andrea."

"But-"

"Trust me. You are not ugly," Miranda kissed Andrea deeply, trying to convey how sincere she was. "You are beautiful Andrea Sachs. Now take your robe off and let yourself indulge in the bath you've prepared."

Andrea closed her eyes and whispered, "Ok." She stood up and loosened the knot she had made. Inhaling deeply, she averted Miranda's eyes and dropped the robe, revealing her bruised and battered body to the most powerful woman in fashion.

"Beautiful," Miranda spoke softly.

She held out her hand for Andrea to take, and gently guided her into the warmth of the bath. Andrea moaned when she felt the heat of the water soothe her tense muscles, and her head fell back onto Miranda's arm that was supporting her.

"Doesn't it feel good?" Miranda's husky tones made Andrea moan again and she nodded.

"Come in with me," Andrea whispered. "Please."

"I will," Miranda agreed and quickly shed her clothes, warmth spreading across her naked body when she saw the brunette gazing at her with such affection shining clearly from the large brown eyes.

Miranda slid into the bath behind Andrea, letting out a groan of her own when she too felt the warmth of the bath relaxing all her muscles. She wrapped her arms around Andrea's middle, and gently pulled the woman back to rest against her body. Andrea sighed with happiness, and let her head fall back on Miranda's shoulder. She could feel the older woman's firm breasts on her back, and it drove her crazy. But for now, being held was more than enough. Miranda' cool breath exhaled in Andrea's ear, and Andrea rested her own hands on top of Miranda's. They didn't turn on the jacuzzi, since they wanted to enjoy the silence.

"I meant to tell you, I loved your gown at the Oscars," Miranda said suddenly. "Prabal Gurung fit you beautifully."

"Thank you," Andrea blushed. "I thought of you when I was looking for possible dresses to wear. I tried to imagine your voice, assessing each gown, and it helped me pick the white Gurung."

"You chose correctly," Miranda said warmly, resting her chin on Andrea's shoulder. "I also wanted to thank you for including me in your Oscar speech, as well as singing the incredible song to me."

"Oscar speeches are the times to thank everyone in your life that meant something," Andrea sighed. "And you, Miranda, mean so much to me. And the song was my way of trying to apologize to you. The lyrics were perfect, since they described exactly everything I was going through. I just wanted to convey to you that I didn't just use you for sex. It was so much more to me than that, yet I didn't say anything because I didn't want you to know."

Miranda placed her wet hand at the top of Andrea's shoulder, and ran it down the length of her arm, caressing the pale skin as she went. When she reached Andrea's wrist, she circled it with her index finger and then interlaced their fingers together, warmly clutching Andrea's hand. "I understand everything now," Miranda pressed her lips to the side of the brunette's neck.

"I cannot tell you how sorry I am though," Andrea said softly, squeezing her hand in Miranda's.

"What's past is past," Miranda pulled their interlocked hands back down to rest on Andrea's belly. "My only concern right now is you. I know I said this earlier, but I need you in my life Andrea. You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I can't lose you. I just can't."

"How did I get so lucky?" Andrea breathed and turned her body around so she was facing Miranda.

The front of their bodies pressed breast to breast, and Andrea's long legs crossed together behind Miranda's waist, bringing their centers dangerously close in an intimate position. Andrea wrapped her lanky arms around Miranda's back and drew her in for a hug, resting her cheek on the side of Miranda's face. Miranda's arms came up to copy Andrea's position, and both women could feel the other's heart beating erratically. It was such a wonderful feeling, being able to physically experience the heartbeat of their partner. It was a sign of life, and Miranda never wanted to stop hearing Andrea's.

The two women stayed in the bath until the water ran cold, and Andrea's shivering alerted Miranda to get her lover out of the tub before she froze to death. Miranda stood up first, and Andrea stared at her body in awe. Rivers of water trailed down the elegant chest, dripping down the flat stomach and gently splashing into the tub of water. She was a goddess, simply put. Miranda smirked at her younger lover's face and reached for a towel, covering herself up. Grabbing an extra one, Andrea stood up from the chilly water and Miranda wrapped the soft fabric around the trembling body. _It felt so good to have somebody take care of her._ Andrea smiled gratefully at her love, and dried herself off. Turning to the counter, she pulled on her pajamas and as she waited for Miranda to finish getting dressed herself, she hung the towel back up. When Andrea was finished, Miranda had donned a black negligee that skimmed the tops of her knees. Andrea's mouth went dry as she feasted her eyes on the older woman, and she could barely form a coherent sentence.

"Is this...acceptable?" Miranda purred, loving the gleam in the brown eyes that widened even further.

"Very much so," Andrea said hoarsely and crossed the distance between them in two long strides.

"You also look incredible," Miranda licked her lips, trailing her eyes down the brunette's chest and long legs. Tracing a bruise lightly with her fingertip, she asked, "Do they hurt?"

"Not really," Andrea sighed. "Sometimes they can be a bit tender, but usually they look a lot worse then they actually are."

Miranda nodded before her eyes suddenly went wide with shock. She snatched her finger away and Andrea gasped from the sudden sting that came with the loss of contact.

"That means I hurt you when we slept together," Miranda covered her mouth, sick with her own actions. "That's why you wanted the lights out. You didn't want me to see what I would do to you."

"No Miranda! You never hurt me," Andrea pleaded. "I would have told you to stop if it was painful. Trust me. You never caused me any physical pain."

"I even touched the bump," Miranda muttered and her forehead creased. "I believed you when you said it was from fixing your sink. God. How dumb could I have been? I could have-"

Andrea quickly placed a kiss on Miranda's lips, breaking the older woman's turmoil. Feeling the sudden tension drain from Miranda's body as she probed the soft mouth with her tongue, Andrea broke the kiss and placed a hand on Miranda's cheek.

"Don't blame yourself in the slightest Miranda. Please. I can't bear it that I brought you so much pain. I lied to you, and yet you still took me back with open arms. None of this is your fault. Promise me that you won't blame yourself for _anything._"_  
_

"But-"

"Promise," Andrea's eyes bore into Miranda's fiercely.

"Alright," Miranda gave in, slumping her shoulders. "I promise."

"Good," Andrea gave her a lopsided grin. "Now where were we?"

And she covered Miranda's mouth with her own and rested her hands on Miranda's upper arms, forcing the older woman to drop the topic. Their kisses started out gentle, and slowly turned more and more passionate. Much like their first time, they ended up in the bedroom without any recollection of getting there. Miranda hit the bed first, and Andrea's light body hovered above hers.

Breaking the kiss, Miranda looked up at the love of her life with concern in her eyes. "Are you sure?"

"I've never been so sure about anything in my life," Andrea smiled down at her. "I love you so much Miranda. I'm not going to make the same mistake as I did before."

"I'll be gentler this time," Miranda reached up and held the back of Andrea's head, pulling her down for a sweet kiss. "And I love you too Andrea."

Miranda could feel Andrea smile against her lips and it spurred her to flip her over so the actress was on the bottom. Miranda kissed Andrea until her lips were swollen. Giving them both a quick reprieve, Miranda moved onto Andrea's neck and swirled her tongue across the soft skin, making the brunette moan softly. Miranda then gently pulled Andrea up into a sitting position so she could pull the tank top off, which made Andrea giggle. Miranda raised an eyebrow in question, and Andrea responded, "So much for even bothering with pajamas! I just put them on not twenty minutes ago." Miranda shook her head at Andrea's words and went back to worshipping the woman she loved. Pushing the brunette's hands up above her head, Miranda kept her hands firmly in Andrea's as she went lower. At the first touch of Miranda's hot, wet mouth on her breast, Andrea cried out and tried to reach down to thread her fingers in Miranda's hair, but was stopped by the older woman's hands locked firmly in her own. Miranda smirked against the smooth skin, and took the bud in her mouth, swiping her tongue across it. Andrea bit her lip and looked up at the ceiling at the sensations Miranda was creating. After switching breasts and giving the other one the same amount of equal attention, Miranda finally let her hands go, and Andrea's fingers went down to immediately to tangle in the soft head of silver hair. The queen of fashion kissed her way back up the panting brunette's body, and began sucking at Andrea's neck. Miranda's hand went between Andrea's legs, and she entered her gently with two fingers, making Andrea open her mouth wordlessly in ecstasy. Andrea wrapped her arms around Miranda's back, drawing her closer to her body as Miranda's fingers drove her closer and closer to the point of oblivion.

"I love you," Miranda breathed in Andrea's ear.

"And I love you," Andrea whimpered back.

Andrea climaxed silently, her muscles tightening around Miranda's fingers. Miranda gently eased her fingers out and Andrea smiled lovingly at her. Turning them over so she was once again on top, Andrea proceeded to make love to the fashion editor. This time was so much better than the last. Both of them were gentler, and instead of being quick, messy, and forceful, they were loving, passionate, and slow. Not that either woman didn't enjoy it quick, messy, and forceful, but it seemed too rushed- too hurried for their first time. There was no 'real' love invested in the first time. Yes, their hearts were invested, but neither woman had any way of knowing what the other thought. Now basking in their afterglows, both Miranda and Andrea believed that it was the very best sex they had ever had.

After they had re-dressed themselves in case the twins decided to come in the morning, Miranda turned down the covers and exposed the expensive sheets, which were a different set this time. Andrea chuckled when she saw the Mulberry silk donning the bed, and she snuggled down into the pillowy softness, letting out a purr of contentment. Miranda settled down next to her, and immediately reached out to gather her love in her arms, wanting her close. Andrea rested her head against Miranda's chest, and smiled sleepily.

"I can't believe that today happened," she murmured in the darkness. "I can't tell you how happy I am Miranda, that you are with me right now."

"You don't need to," Miranda's eyes shined with tears, yet she refused to let the brunette see them. Keeping the trembling out of her voice, she said, "I feel exactly the same way."

Another couple of minutes passed in silence. Miranda stifled her sobs and rested her top of her head on Andrea's.

"Your scent relaxes me," Andrea said quietly, tracing the top of Miranda's negligee with her fingers. "I haven't slept in so long, but I have a feeling that with you holding me, I will be able to sleep better than I have had in the past couple of weeks."

"I'll always be here for you," Miranda pressed her tender lips against Andrea's forehead. "Sleep now Andrea. I love you."

"I love you too Mira," Andrea mumbled, her eyes already closing.

Soon, her breaths evened out, and Miranda finally let herself cry for the woman she had almost lost. Miranda tightened the frail body closer in her arms, and promised herself that she would do everything in her power to keep the young woman alive. She just couldn't lose Andrea...she would break. Miranda shuddered and hugged Andrea even closer. After laying awake dealing with her inner chaos, Miranda finally succumbed to the fatigue that overtook her body, and fell asleep holding her love in her arms.


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you so much to everybody who has read/reviewed/PM'd! Ok, this brilliant idea that I'm going to write about in this chapter (Mr. Hugh Jackman will make an appearance again...plus come back in the next chapter :P) came from Poppinswannabe, so thanks girl! :) As always, feel free to leave a review ;)**

The first thing Andrea realized as she slowly opened her eyes was that she actually slept through a whole night without waking up from night sweats or nightmares. The cause of her restful slumber was the beautiful woman still peacefully sleeping not five inches away from her. Letting out a small gasp at remembering the night before, Andrea closed her eyes and rested her forehead against Miranda's as she sighed and thanked whatever deity there was for giving her another chance. Miranda's arms were wrapped around Andrea's thin frame, and the brunette's arms were pressed tightly against her own chest, slightly brushing the swell of the older woman's breasts. Pressing her full lips on the smooth skin between Miranda's breasts, Andrea traced her fingertips against her lover's collarbone, fascinated by the elegance of it. Her hand reached higher until it caressed Miranda's neck, and then made its way to the Editor's pink lips. Andrea's fingertip gently traced the thin upper lip and then leaned in to press her lips against Miranda's. The silver-haired woman mumbled something in her sleep, and Andrea grinned against her lips. The brunette kept stroking Miranda's lips languidly with her own, gently coaxing the older woman awake. Finally, crystal blue eyes peered open to look into dark pools swimming with love.

"Good morning beautiful," Andrea whispered, her eyes crinkling in a loving smile.

"You stayed," Miranda said hoarsely, revealing her vulnerability. She wrapped her arms more firmly around Andrea, making the younger woman's heart break at how she hurt Miranda the first time.

"Of course I did," Andrea wriggled her arm out from in between their chests, and brushed a silvery lock of hair out of Miranda's face. "I'm never going to make that mistake again. I love you so much."

"Oh god Andrea," Miranda whimpered and rested her forehead against Andrea's. "I do too...so much it almost hurts. I never want to wake up alone again."

"Me neither," Andrea agreed, nuzzling her nose against Miranda's.

"I loved the wake-up call," Miranda smiled.

"I did too," Andrea grinned back and then leaned in to kiss Miranda properly. When she pulled back, both of them were a bit dazed from the intensity of the kiss. "You know," Andrea panted slightly, out of breath, "I was right about what I said last night."

"And what was that?"

"It was the first time in months where I've actually been able to sleep through all throughout the night. You help calm my mind, as well as my body."

"You'll never have to sleep alone again," Miranda said vehemently. "And you help calm me too Andrea."

And after her declaration, both women were locked in a heated kiss once more, letting their passion and love for each other take over.

* * *

Miranda had her cheek resting on the top of Andrea's head as she traced the bruises on Andrea's arms. After making love, they laid together peacefully, propped up against the headboard of the bed. Their hands were intertwined, and they talked for a while about Runway, the girls, and life in general. Avoiding the subject of cancer at all costs, they chose to talk about light topics, like the latest movie, or the hottest new up and coming designer.

"Hey, I have to go to the bathroom," Andrea kissed the bridge of Miranda's nose. "I'll be right back."

She slid out of bed and padded to the bathroom naked. She picked up her discarded tank-top and shorts off the floor from where she had thrown them as they made love, and sauntered to the bathroom. Miranda watched her go with a smile on her face. After the brunette had returned from the bathroom fully dressed, Miranda followed her loves example and went to the restroom too. When she was done, she found her love leaning up against the backboard of the bed in the same position she was in earlier. Miranda climbed into her bed, rejoining the brunette, and rested her head on Andrea's shoulder. As she laid with the love of her life, she felt the most content she had in all of her 54 years of life.

"What time is it?" she asked out of the blue.

"It's 8:30," Andrea said after glancing at the clock by her bedside. "Where are the twins?"

"Oh, it's Saturday," Miranda waved her hand carelessly. "They'll be up soon. They would be up at a later time, but I refuse to let them sleep for so long on the weekends."

Andrea chuckled and then gasped as a familiar piercing pain shot through her abdomen.

"Andrea what is it?" Miranda gasped and sat up as she ran her hand over the brunette's back.

"Ugh," Andrea groaned. "It's what happened at the Oscars. I get this piercing pain in my stomach sometimes...It's getting worse every day."

"What can I do?" Miranda looked at her, feeling hopeless. She wanted to take her love's pain away, and it killed her a little to see that she could do virtually nothing to ease the pain.

"Nothing," Andrea doubled over, clutching her stomach. "It'll pass."

Miranda soothingly ran her hand over Andrea's back, trying to do anything to make the pain-struck woman feel more comfortable. Andrea's forehead broke out in a sweat, and she panted as her stomach contorted. "I think it's because I haven't eaten anything in so long," Andrea closed her eyes and rested her head back against the headboard. "Lymphoma shouldn't cause my stomach to act like this."

"I'm calling the doctor right away and we're going in for an appointment today," Miranda said immediately.

"My doctor is Dr. Ethen Garrison," Andrea murmured. "Thank you Mira."

Miranda's response was to nod and pull the brunette in for a comforting hug. Resting her chin on Miranda's shoulder, she inhaled deeply, savoring the scent of the older woman. The pain in her stomach subsided, and Andrea tucked her face in the crook of Miranda's neck. The two women sat in contemplative silence until the twins' footsteps alerted them to the arrival of the twins. A knock sounded at the door, and Miranda called out, "Come in!"

"Mom!" Caroline cried and then faltered when she saw Andrea in her mother's arms.

"Andy?" Cassidy gasped.

"Um, hi girls," Andrea smiled weakly.

"Where did you come from?" Caroline crossed her arms.

"Um..."

"Girls, Andrea is here because last night she needed to be with someone," Miranda jumped in to save the brunette.

"Oh," Cassidy said, not knowing what to say. She knew that her mother had been hurt beyond belief, and although she didn't know the details, she knew Andy had been involved. Eyeing the brunette warily, she was grateful to hear her sister pipe up.

"Are you here to hurt Mom again?" Caroline raised an eyebrow and glared at the brunette.

"Caroline!" Miranda scolded and gently squeezed Andrea's tense arms.

"What?" Caroline shrugged and looked defiantly at her mother. "I want to know if she's here to ruin you again. Because if she is, I'll-"

"Caroline Anne Priestly, I don't want to hear such words come out of your mouth again. Andrea has a serious form of cancer, and all is forgiven. There was a miscommunication and that is the end of it," Miranda snapped. Hearing a quiet sniffling, her broke when she realized Andrea was crying softly. Turning to Andrea, she wiped the tears that fell from her brown eyes and looked deeply into the chocolate pools, trying to convey her love and forgiveness.

"I'm sorry," Caroline looked down shamefully. "It wasn't right of me to-"

"No," Andrea broke in, her voice cracking a little. "I understand your protective nature of your Mom. I made a terrible mistake, and it almost cost me the love of my life-" Hearing the twins' surprised gasp, Andrea pushed on, "yes, I love your Mother to the ends of the earth and back. She is everything to me, and I am so sorry that I hurt her so much."

"All is forgiven," Miranda repeated, squeezing Andrea's hand gently.

Cassidy timidly walked over and climbed up on the bed, sitting across from Andrea and her mom. "What kind of cancer do you have Andy?"

"Lymphoma," Andrea sighed and looked down. "My survival rate isn't good right now."

"I told you not to say that," Miranda whispered fiercely, making both her daughters open their mouths in shock. Their mother had never been so adamant about something that wasn't related to Runway, grades, or their personal lives. Apparently Andrea had become part of the family, and therefore, into their personal lives. They looked at each other, and then communicating silently as twins can do, they agreed that they would accept Andrea in their family. The brunette was kind, smart, and took the time to get to know them.

"I'm sorry Mira," Andrea kept her eyes trained on the bedspread.

Caroline walked over and joined her family on the bed. "Andy, you've got to fight. Please? For us?"

"Of course I will sweetie," Andrea reached over and clutched Caroline's hand firmly.

"But you have to promise something," Cassidy said seriously.

"Anything," Andrea leaned over and held Cassidy's hand too.

"Don't ever hurt my mom again," Cassidy said, her piercing green eyes locked on Andrea's.

Swallowing, Andrea nodded her agreement and choked out, "I swear."

"Good."

* * *

Andrea looked at the bowl of oatmeal in front of her, thinking inanely that it was odd for her stomach not to growl. She picked up the spoon and poked at the lumpy food, resting her other hand on the back of her neck. Sitting with one leg under her, Miranda was seated to her right, and the twins sat across from her. Snorting to herself, Andrea found it crazy to believe that she was actually eating breakfast with the Priestly family. She put some of the oats on her spoon, and lifted it before setting it back down in the bowl.

"Andrea, you must eat something," Miranda looked concernedly at her young lover.

"I know, I'm just not hungry," Andrea sighed and rubbed the back of her neck.

"You promised you'd try," Cassidy reminded her.

"I know," Andrea closed her eyes and re-opened them.

She picked the spoon up again and lifted it to her mouth. Grimacing, she popped the spoon in her mouth and chewed the oatmeal quickly before swallowing. Her empty stomach twisted when the food hit it, and Andrea hid a wince. Cassidy seemed satisfied, and went back to eating her own breakfast. Miranda reached across the table and grabbed Andrea's hand. Squeezing it, she mouthed, 'thank you.' Andrea gave her a weak smile and returned the loving grip. She forced herself to choke down the rest of the oatmeal and then rested her head in her hands when she was done. Concentrating on evening her breathing, she didn't hear the girls leave.

"Andrea? Are you ok?" Miranda stroked her hand on the brunette's face.

"Yes, I just need a moment," Andrea looked up. "Where are the twins?"

"They went to go get changed. Cassidy is going to a movie, and Caroline has tennis practice and then sleeping over at a friend's house," Miranda explained. Seeing the ashen look on Andrea's face, she offered, "You can take a bath or shower if you want if it would help you."

"I might, thank you," Andrea smiled at Miranda. "A cold shower sounds perfect."

"I'll call the doctor while you're in the shower," Miranda stood up and cleared both of their dishes. Walking over to the counter, she was in the process of rinsing them off when a pair of arms circled around her waist.

"Are you sure you don't want to join me?" a husky voice purred in her ear.

Shivering, Miranda shook her head. "As much as the offer tempts me, I really must call the doctor."

"He can wait," Andrea kissed the tender spot behind Miranda's ear.

"But your health can't," Miranda turned around in the embrace and gave her a gentle kiss.

Andrea pouted, knowing that she had lost. Miranda kissed the bridge of the brunette's nose before proceeding to kiss the pout off of Andrea's face. When they parted, Andrea sighed blissfully and pulled Miranda even closer for a hug.

"Okay, I'll go take a cold shower," Andrea paused dramatically. "All by myself."

"You will be fine," Miranda shook her head affectionately.

"Fine," Andrea pouted again, but turned away to head upstairs. But before she could leave, Miranda caught her by the arm and spun her around in for one more kiss.

"I love you," Miranda reminded her.

Andrea's smile was blinding. "And I love you."

After the brunette had exited the kitchen, Miranda pulled out her iPhone and made a quick call to the doctors. After using her best 'Editor' voice, she had quickly set up an appointment with Dr. Garrison for 4:00. Smirking, she headed upstairs and paused at Caroline's door. She knocked and poked her head in after she heard the affirmation, relieved to find both of her daughters in the same room. Cassidy, wearing jeans and boots, looked more dressed up than Caroline, who was in her tennis gear. Both of them were looking in the mirror and assessing their bodies and their outfits.

"Hey Mom," Caroline greeted as she turned sideways to look at her profile.

"Hi Bobbseys," Miranda said. She walked to their bed and perched herself regally on it. "Girls, I'm not going to beat around the bush. Are you alright with me dating Andrea?"

Cassidy swiped some mascara through her lashes and answered, "As long as she doesn't hurt you again. She's actually pretty cool."

"Caroline?" Miranda asked.

"I think she's ok," the more protective twin turned serious. "But I agree with Cass. If she ever hurts you again..." she trailed off, fiddling with a leather bracelet that adorned her wrist. Miranda had tired multiple times, unsuccessfully, to get her to take it off, but Caroline was resolved to wear it, saying that it was her 'lucky' bracelet. It always helped her win tennis matches, and Caroline was convinced that if she ever lost or decided not to wear it, she would lose.

"I understand your concern girls, but I am very confident that Andrea will not disappoint me again," Miranda crossed her legs. "She is everything to me."

Cassidy screwed the top back on the mascara bottle and sat down next to her mom, wrapping her in a tight hug. Caroline followed suit, and Miranda kissed both of them on the top of their heads.

"We're really glad that you've found her then," Cassidy said. "You deserve some happiness."

"Thank you both," Miranda held them tighter.

"No problem Mom," Caroline grinned and stood up from the bed.

"I'm going to take her to the doctor's today," Miranda said and bit her lip. "We'll have to stay overnight after the chemo is administered."

"Everything will work out," Caroline leaned in and kissed her mother on the cheek, "I hope Andy is okay, and I hope that you won't stay up all night worrying about her. I'm really sorry, but I have to run; my tennis lesson is in 20 minutes."

"Do you need a ride from Roy?" Miranda asked, fiddling with the sash of her robe.

"Nah, Katie's mom is going to take us," Caroline pecked her mom on the cheek and grabbed her tennis bag. "Thanks though! See you tomorrow."

She left and it was Cassidy's turn to stand up. She stretched and picked her Coach bag up from the floor.

"I also wish you guys luck," Cassidy sighed. "It really sucks-"

"Language!"

"-stinks that you guys have to go through that. I wish I could go, but I have to meet Zoe in a little while," Cassidy said.

"It's alright sweetie. Have a good time," Miranda rested her hands on her slim thighs and watched as her beautiful daughter blow her a kiss and skip out the door.

Chuckling to herself, she got up off the bed and made her way into her bedroom. She heard the shower run and was just about to slip her nightgown off to join her love when a phone rang. Obviously, it was Andrea's because her ringtone sounded different, but it wasn't on the nightstand where she thought it would be. After scanning the room quickly with her eyes, Miranda spotted the iPhone resting on the floor and bent over to pick it up, intent on turning it to silent, but the caller id made her freeze. Hugh Jackman. Growling, Miranda swiped her finger over the 'answer' icon on the screen and lifted it to her ear, cooly saying, "Hello."

"Andy?" the charming Australian accent sounded over the phone.

Rolling her eyes at the actor's stupid assumption when clearly her voice was so different than the sweet brunette's, Miranda huffed, "No. Miranda Priestly."

"Miranda?" Hugh Jackman sounded surprised.

"Clearly your cognitive thought process is what attracted Mr. Tom Hooper to give you the role in the first place," Miranda rolled her eyes.

"Sorry," he said meekly, "is Andy there?"

"No, she's not available right now," Miranda sat down on her bed and ran her hand over the smooth fabric.

"Oh," Hugh faltered, not knowing how to speak to one of the most powerful women in the world. "Um, could you please-"

"Mr. Jackman, I am a very busy woman and don't have time for your idiotic stuttering," Miranda put an extra bit of iciness in her voice, the green monster taking over her body. "I suggest that you tell me whatever it is you want to tell Andrea, and I will make sure that the message will be given to her."

"Right," Hugh loosened his tie. This woman really knew how to knock a man down a few pegs. "Ok. I was calling to ask her if she was all right."

"What do you mean?" Miranda was instantly on high alert.

"She fainted after her performance at the Oscars," Hugh sounded confused. "I didn't see it, but a stage member leaked the story to the press, and it's everywhere. People are speculating if she-"

"That's all," Miranda growled and hung up.

"Hello?" Hugh pulled his phone away from his ear, looked at it, and then shook his head before hanging up.

Miranda stalked to the bathroom and flung the door open. Andrea jumped in the shower, and turned around. The steam from the hot water hid her naked body from view, but her head was still visible.

"Mira? Are you alright?" Andrea looked at her through the foggy glass with concern written in her eyes.

"Why didn't you tell me you fainted at the Oscars?" Miranda got straight to the point.

"Wait, how did you know about that?" Andrea placed her hand on the opaque shower window.

"Your _charming_ friend Hugh Jackman told me that just five minutes ago," Miranda seethed. "Apparently some stage hand leaked the story to the press, and now they are making it as juicy as they can."

Andrea closed her eyes and rested her head against the glass. "Great."

"You still didn't answer my question," Miranda tapped her fingers on her upper arm skittishly.

Andrea lifted her head and looked Miranda in the eyes. "I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to worry."

Not knowing what to say to that, Miranda stared off in the distance and felt tears build up. She hugged herself tighter and concentrated on not crying. She really didn't know why she was acting this way. Miranda had no right to be mad at the brunette, and now she was crying on top of everything. Sniffing, she half-heartededly nodded her head and wiped away a couple of errant tears that streaked down her face.

"Miranda," Andrea's voice was laced with pain. "Please, come here."

Miranda's hands seemed to have a mind of their own as they reached down to pull her robe and elegant pajamas off. She padded over to the shower door, and Andrea opened it to let the older woman in. Naked flesh pressed together as Andrea wrapped Miranda in a firm hug. She closed her eyes and let her tears mix with the shower water as she felt the brunette's lanky arms enveloped tightly around her body.

"Will you tell me what's got you so upset?" Andrea asked softly, stroking the iconic silver hair.

"I don't really know," Miranda shook her head. She inhaled deeply, and smelled her soap on the younger woman's body. It gave her a strange sense of comfort, so she opened her mouth again and continued, "I don't like the feeling of not knowing what is happening to you. I hate not being able to protect you from everything. It's like the feeling I get with my children...I need to protect the ones I love, and so far, I'm doing a pretty shitty job of it with you."

Andrea was shocked at the profanity coming out of the usually civilized mouth, but her reaction to the woman's words made her melt. "Oh Mira," Andrea murmured in her ear and held her closer, rocking them gently under the hot spray of water. "Don't you see? You've been protecting me ever since we met again. Unfortunately, you can't protect me from everything, but you help me through all my problems and you love me. That's all I need."

"But-"

"But nothing," Andrea pulled back and her shiny brown eyes bore into Miranda's slightly red ones. "Be there for me. It's all that I can ever ask for."

"I promise I will," Miranda whispered and leaned in to press her lips against Andrea's. Surely, there was nothing more perfect than standing under the warm shower kissing her love. Idly, she thought about when she was a teenager and thought that kissing in the rain was gross whenever she watched movies where the main characters smooched in a pouring downfall. Laughing at her younger self, she parted her lips and let Andrea's tongue slip in. There was nothing more perfect than kissing in the water with Andrea. After they drew apart, Andrea ran her fingers through Miranda's short hair and kissed her on the forehead.

"I love you," Andrea smiled.

"And I love you," Miranda hummed in contentment. Her tears had dried, and her heart was sated. Except- "What about Mr. Jackman?"

"Hugh?" Andrea grinned and held tight when she felt the Editor try and squirm away from her. "He's just a very good friend."

"Hmm," was all Miranda said, feigning indifference.

Andrea chuckled. "What did you say to him?"

"I might have scared him a little," Miranda admitted. "I wasn't very nice."

Andrea sighed with a grin on her lips. "I'll call him later."

"Fine," Miranda scowled.

"I'm all yours beautiful!" Andrea winked and kissed her again.

"Good," Miranda looked down and blew out a breath of air. "What are you going to do about the gossip rags?"

"Well as for the press, I'm past the point of caring about what they write about me," Andrea shrugged. "I'll just take it in stride. I might make a public statement...I might not. I don't know yet."

"I think you should," Miranda thought carefully. "It could be beneficial to everyone. You could set the record straight, and make those deplorable people feel bad about whatever they wrote about you."

"I don't care," Andrea laughed. "But I'll make a statement if you would like me to." And she leaned in once more to ravish her girlfriend under the steamy water.

* * *

"This might hurt a bit, but it will soon be over," Dr. Garrison said and inserted a needle with a plastic tube on it through Andrea's vein on the back of her hand.

Andrea sucked in a breath at the sharp sting of it, and whimpered as the needle was pulled out, leaving just the tube within the vein. Miranda watched the procedure, her sympathy and pain for her love reflected in her clear eyes as she squeezed Andrea's other hand tightly. Andrea gave her a tense smile and turned her gaze back to her hand.

"There," the doctor said as he applied an adhesive dressing to keep it clean and in position. "You'll be ready tomorrow morning to leave."

"Thanks doctor," Andrea smiled weakly at him and laid her head back on the headrest of the hospital bed she was laying in.

"If you need anything, just push that button for assistance," he said and jotted a few things down on his notebook. "I'll be back periodically to check on you."

He stood up, nodded twice to the both women before exiting the room. The two women sat together in silence for a while, not knowing what to say. Finally, Miranda broke the silence.

"Thank you Andrea," she said lowly and rested her head on Andrea's hand that didn't have the iv in it.

"I should be thanking you. I need to fight for my life," the brunette said, running her fingers through the beautiful silver hair. "For you, for the girls, for my friends, and for me."

Miranda kissed Andrea's palm and released a few hot tears.

"Darling, come up here with me," Andrea patted the spot next to her.

Miranda nodded silently and squeezed herself in a rather undignified fashion onto the small hospital bed next to the skinny brunette. Curling her body next to Andrea's, she rested on her side so she could look in the actresses big chocolate eyes. Andrea shifted her body so she was facing Miranda, and intertwined their legs to provide warmth, comfort, and a physical connection. Miranda let her tears fall, and her shoulders shook with silent sobs, driving her head to curl into Andrea's neck. Andrea's heart broke, and she wrapped her arm around Miranda's shaking frame.

Opening her mouth, she sang softly,

_"Mira, it's turned so cold_

_Mira, it's past your bedtime_

_You've played the day away_

_And soon it will be night._

Miranda felt herself tear up even more, and shut her eyes, letting the brunette's melodic voice wash over her. Silent tears slipped down her cheeks and dripped onto Andrea's pale neck. Miranda's heart broke as she cried for the woman that she loved more than life itself.

_Come to me, Mira, the light is fading_

_Don't you see the evening star appearing?_

Andrea could feel herself tearing up too, and she rested her face in Miranda's soft hair. It wasn't fair. It seemed so cruel that she got so little time with this miraculous woman. Lips trembling, her voice wavered slightly as she continued singing the slow-paced, soft tune.

_Come to me, and rest against my shoulder_

_How fast the minutes fly away and every minute colder._

Andrea placed a kiss on Miranda's head, her lips trembling.

_Hurry near, another day is dying_

_Don't you hear, the winter wind is crying?_

_There's a darkness which comes without a warning_

_But I will sing you lullabies and wake you in the morning."_

Miranda looked up and pressed her lips on Andrea's lips, her tears still streaming down her face. Andrea's eyes cried too, and their salty tears mingled. Pulling away, Miranda kept her blue orbs locked on Andrea's chocolate pools, and no words were spoken-they conveyed everything they were feeling through their eyes. It might have been awkward, staring into each other's eyes for so long, but both women were so emotionally drained, it seemed right. There was no embarrassment, or self-consciousness. It was simply two souls trying to find some comfort admist the turmoil they were both going through.


	11. Chapter 11

**Thanks guys, I'm so sorry for the delay! There should be one more chapter after this one :) Warning: Character death at the end of this chapter.**

Andrea was discharged from the hospital easily and quickly the next morning. Miranda had been key in making the process run smoothly and swiftly. Although her blue eyes had dark circles and were red-rimmed, it just added to the illusion of her personality, and many nurses were scrambling to please the intimidating-looking woman. Miranda hadn't slept well the night prior, mostly because the bed hurt her back, and partly because she was fearful that if she fell asleep the brunette might breathe her last breath. She had held Andrea tightly throughout the night, sucking her breath in whenever the brunette's body shook with coughs or night sweats.

When they woke up, Andrea couldn't even describe how thankful she was that Miranda had stayed up with her all night. Pressing sweet kisses all over Miranda's exhausted face, she tried to convey her love through her actions. Miranda had hugged her tightly, and whispered, 'I love you' over and over again to the young woman. Shortly after, Miranda had snapped at a nurse to let them go, and 15 minutes later, they were in the car, driving to the townhouse. The paparazzi hadn't been tipped off, so no clamoring press was scrambling to get the latest news about the new Best Supporting Actress.

Once they reached the townhouse, both women were so exhausted, they went straight up to their bedroom and barely pulled the covers away before they fell down on the plush bed. Andrea curled on her side, facing Miranda, and interlaced their hands.

"When are the twins coming home?" Andrea asked, her voice a bit hoarse.

Miranda glanced at the bedside clock. "In about two hours or so. They both probably stayed up all night, so they are sleeping in this morning."

Andrea closed her eyes and nodded. "Get some sleep Mira," she whispered, squeezing the tense fingers in her own.

Miranda leaned in and captured Andrea's lips with her own, making the brunette smile. "I love you," Andrea managed to murmur before she fell asleep.

"I love you too," Miranda looked at Andrea with heavy eyes. She reached down and pulled the sheets and comforter up, carefully tucking the blankets in around the frail body so Andrea wouldn't get chilled. Snuggling closer to the sleeping woman, Miranda kissed her freckled nose and then allowed herself to fall asleep as well, letting her even breath mix with Andrea's.

* * *

"Hey Hugh," Andrea smiled as she talked to her good friend. Balancing the phone between her cheek and her shoulder, she played with Miranda's hair, trying to placate her jealous lover. Miranda grumbled, but snuggled deeper in Andrea's lap, content with the knowledge that Andrea loved her, and only her.

"Andy!" Hugh's voice could be heard through the small speaker, and Miranda rolled her eyes. "Are you alright?"

"Yes Hugh, I'm fine," Andrea brushed the back of her hand on the side of Miranda's face, keeping her dark eyes fixed on Miranda's crystal ones. "The whole thing at the Oscars is nothing to worry about. I just hadn't had enough food in my system, plus I was extremely nervous."

"Good god, I thought something terrible had happened," Andrea could practically hear Hugh's head shaking and smiled fondly.

"I do have something to tell you," Andrea confessed, her hand pausing in Miranda's hair. Concerned, the editor reached up and tangled her fingers with the brunette's.

"Yeah?" Hugh asked, his forehead creasing in concern.

"I have cancer," she whispered, and felt Miranda's hands tightening on hers almost painfully.

There was silence on the other end. Then a low whistle. "Geez Andy," Hugh's voice shook slightly. "I thought you said it was nothing to worry about. What kind of cancer?"

"Lymphoma," Andrea smiled at Miranda when the older woman kissed her palm.

"I thought that was easily treatable," Hugh said.

"They caught it too late," Andrea's lips tugged up into a sad smile. "And I waited too long to do chemo."

"Geez Andy," Hugh repeated, running his hand through his russet-colored hair. "Can I see you?"

"That was part of the reason why I called you," Andrea let out a soft chuckle. "You can come over today if you would like. I'm staying at Miranda's. I'll text you her address."

"Yeah, I'll be over around 3 or so," Hugh rubbed his eyes.

"Sounds good," Andrea twisted her finger in Miranda's soft hair. "See you then."

"Bye."

Hugh hung up and let himself shed a couple of tears for the amazing woman he had worked with.

* * *

The doorbell rang, and Caroline rushed to get it. Despite being a sleepover the night before, she had actually gotten to bed at a decent hour and didn't feel the need to sleep all day like her sister did. Flinging open the door, she grinned when she saw Hugh.

"Hi, I'm Caroline," she introduced herself and shook his hand.

"Hello Caroline," Hugh gave her a charming grin, and Caroline fainted a little when she heard his Australian accent. Pulling herself together, she cleared her throat and gestured up the stairs. "Andy's up there with my Mom."

"Thank you," Hugh smiled at her again, making Caroline let out an embarrassing giggle.

He made his way up the staircase, and immediately spotted Andrea and Miranda sitting on the bed together in a room down the hall. Their heads were leaning against each other, and they were talking quietly. Hesitantly, he walked over to the bedroom and knocked on the half-open door. Andrea looked up and her mega-watt smile lit up the room. Miranda looked up as well, and pinned him with an icy glare.

"Hey Andy," Hugh smiled. "Miranda."

"Hey Hugh!" Andrea shakily stood up, gently brushing off Miranda's attempt to help her. "It's okay," she whispered to her love.

Taking a deep breath, she leaned heavily on the bedside table and started making her way to her friend. Hugh quickly strode over to the bed and caught the thin brunette in his arms before she toppled over. Andrea threw her arms around him and inhaled his scent. While delicious, nothing could compare to Miranda's unique fragrance. Still, it was comforting and she felt safe wrapped in the strong actor's arms. They stood in their embrace for a while before Miranda had reached her limit and cleared her throat. Hugh looked up and caught Miranda's angry glare. Swallowing, he loosened his grip around Andrea and helped her sit back down on the bed where she was immediately enveloped in Miranda's somewhat-possessive embrace.

"It's so good to see you," Andrea said, her eyes shining as she looked at him.

"You too," he said gruffly, trying to keep his emotions in check.

His eyes wandered over her figure, noting that she was extremely skinny, and her face had become more gaunt. However, her big brown eyes were still as expressive as ever, and her beauty could not be killed by cancer. She was still smiling, and although exhaustion shone in every fiber of her being, she looked happy.

"I know," Andrea laughed self-consciously. "I'm a sight for sore eyes."

"Actually, I think you're beautiful," Hugh said honestly, wanting her to believe it.

"Thanks," Andrea blushed, and Miranda shot him another filthy look. "You can sit down. I feel awkward if you're the only one standing. Or if you prefer, we could go to the living room."

"Um," Hugh took one glance at Miranda's expression and hesitated.

"We can go to the sitting room," Andrea squeezed Miranda's arm gently. "That would be more comfortable anyways."

She stood up again, and Miranda quickly scrambled to help her. Hugh shook his head at the blatant love that shone between the two. He had never seen Miranda Priestly _scramble_ for anything-let alone anyone. He was sure that Andy wouldn't have looked that..._relaxed_ about everything if it weren't for Miranda. Hugh could feel the tension in his shoulders ease a bit when he realized that Andrea was safe, protected, and loved in Miranda's care. He followed the two women silently, keeping his large arms out to the sides in mid-air just in case they needed help.

Once they reached the living room, Andrea's forehead was sweaty and her respiration patterns were a little irregular. It was obvious that she was trying to downplay her well-being though, since her efforts to regulate her breathing were clearly shining on her face. Gritting her teeth, she drew strength from Miranda's firm grip on her waist, and made it to the living room before ungracefully plopping down on the couch. Her face turned a little red when she realized that the considerable effort it had taken her to walk down the stairs had made her produce sweat. Just a couple months ago, Andrea could run up and down the stairs multiple times without even causing a hitch in her breathing. Miranda sensed her love's discomfort, and motioned for Hugh to sit down _across_ from the brunette while she claimed the space next to Andrea for herself.

"Caroline," Miranda called softly, and the redhead appeared.

"Yes Mom?" she held a small blue bowl of pistachios in her hand.

"Please get us water."

"Sure," Caroline disappeared.

Within minutes, she came back tediously balancing three glasses of water in her hands. Hugh immediately jumped up and helped her, taking two of the glasses and setting them in front of Miranda and Andrea. Caroline, flushed, meekly handed him the last glass and tried not to blush further when he took it with the sexiest nod she had ever seen. Their fingers brushed, and Caroline snatched her hand back as quickly as she could. _He's married. And has children. _Tipping her head, she rushed quickly from the room and back to her bowl of pistachios, trying to soothe her thumping heartbeat. Andrea watched her go with an expression of love on her face. She drank the water in front of her, trying not to gulp it down too fast. The other two adults watched her with concern etched on their faces, as if she would drop dead any second. Although her lungs burned from the oxygen-depravity and her energy was zapped, she schooled her features and began a conversation to ease the tension.

"So, how are you Hugh?" she asked with another winning smile on her face.

Hugh leaned over and rested his forearms on his thighs, clutching his hands together, and thought that Andrea Sachs was one of the strongest, most inspirational, and sweetest girls he had ever met.

* * *

The adults had a relaxed conversation after the initial strain in the beginning, and talked about Hugh's life, as well as Andy's and Miranda's. They joked, they were serious, and they had periods where none of them said anything, lost in their own thoughts. Throughout the conversation, Hugh had made some intellectual comments, as well as funny quips that had made Andrea laugh, so Miranda had warmed up to him. Mid-way through, Cassidy had stumbled down the stairs and abruptly stopped when she saw Hugh. Self-consciously, she had smoothed her hair, which had stuck up in odd places, and mumbled a 'hi' before dashing back up to make herself more presentable. Andrea chuckled when she saw that both twins were enamored with the actor. Soon, Cassidy had come back down looking considerably more dressed up than she had before, and sat with them, seating herself next to Andrea's other side. Caroline, seeing her sister join, slunk in and sat in the chair closest to Hugh. Their conversation lightened, since they had the topics of the twins to talk about, and Andrea could feel her spirits lift. Miranda, whose arm was gently slung around Andrea's waist, could feel some of the stress drain out of her lover, and softly squeezed her side. The brunette looked at Miranda with so much love in her dark pools, that the older woman had to catch her breath. She took Miranda's hand and caressed it, not letting go until they stood up again when Hugh left.

Andrea hugged the actor goodbye, both of them thinking it may be the last time that they see each other until-well. Andrea tried very hard not to think about that. Biting her lip, she tried to convey her feelings of immense friendship and love to her mentor through her embrace. Hugh rested his cheek on top of his young friend's hair, and closed his eyes, remembering the scene he did in the movie where he had carried her to the hospital. She had seemed so frail, but that was acting. Now, she really was frail, and he had no place to carry her. He understood what Andrea was trying to communicate, and tried his damned hardest to reciprocate his feelings through his actions. Miranda and her children looked at them silently, knowing how much it meant for them to say goodbye-they knew it meant more than just saying goodbye until they saw each other again. Cassidy reached over and, startling Miranda, wrapped her arms around her waist and clung tightly. Miranda rested her hand on her daughter's back and squeezed, not being able to form words. Caroline stood up from her place in the chair and made her way to Miranda's other side and copied her twin's position, resting her head on Miranda's stomach. The Editor could feel her eyes prickling with tears, and tried furiously to blink them away. After Andrea and Hugh had finally stepped away from each other, he kissed her forehead and stepped back, still holding her hands. Miranda would have been seeing red, but she knew that their relationship was no more than a wonderful friendship. He had helped her Andrea be successful. She gave a comforting squeeze to her children, and then stood up and walked over to where they were standing. Her hand resumed its earlier position on Andrea's waist, and she shook hands with Hugh after he had let go of the young woman's hands.

"Thank you," he said quietly to Miranda.

She shook her head. "No, thank you."

He nodded and smiled tightly at Andrea. "Take care of yourself, kiddo."

"I will. I have Miranda," Andrea said sweetly. Then she turned serious. "Thank you so much for everything Hugh."

Hugh gave her one last smile and replied, "You're welcome. It was truly an honor to meet you Andrea Sachs." Turning to Caroline and Cassidy who were still on the couch, his lips turned up and said, "It was nice to meet you Cassidy and Caroline. You both are remarkable young ladies."

And then, before things got too emotional, he turned on his heel and walked to the front door. Andrea watched him go with a fondness in her eyes and then turned to her love. Wrapping her arms around Miranda's back, she pulled the older woman close to her body and rested her forehead against the soft skin of the other woman's.

"Thank you," she breathed.

Miranda answered her with a kiss and then rested her forehead back on Andrea's. Caroline and Cassidy came over from the couch, and hugged them both in a four-way embrace. Andrea's arms dropped from Miranda's back and rested on each girl's shoulder, making them feel more included. However, her forehead still rested against Miranda's to maintain their physical connection.

* * *

After a quiet evening with the girls, Andrea and Miranda made the tedious climb back up the staircase to get to their bedroom.

"I really should have installed an elevator," Miranda's heart ached when she saw the brunette struggling.

Andrea let out a breathless laugh and replied, "You have three flights. Hardly any reason to."

When they finally reached their bedroom, Andrea collapsed onto the bed and rolled on her back, taking deep shuddering gulps of air. Miranda sat next to her, gently stroking her face and feeling helpless. Once the younger woman regained her equilibrium, she smiled up at Miranda and tugged her down to lay next to her.

"Thank you," she said, kissing the older woman.

"You're welcome," Miranda said simply, her lips tugging up in a beautiful smile.

"Mira," Andrea started and then blushed deeply.

"What is it darling?" Miranda brushed the back of her fingers against Andrea's cheekbone, making the latter close her eyes.

"I-that is, um," Andrea stuttered before pulling herself together. "I want to make love to you."

Floored, Miranda raised Andrea's hand and kissed her palm. "If you are well enough-"

"I am," Andrea's eyes shone with determination and love.

She leaned in and captured Miranda's perfect lips with her own. Mustering all her strength, she rolled on top of her love and deepened the kisses. Miranda moaned softly, and Andrea's heart almost exploded at the sound. She wanted Miranda to feel all the love and desire and thankfulness she possessed for her. The older woman had been key in helping her live, and Andrea needed to show her how much Miranda's love meant to her. Sucking on Miranda's bottom lip before plunging her tongue into her mouth, Andrea's hands roamed up her soul mate's slender body. She cupped a full breast in her hand and tilted her head so she was planting kisses over the pale expanse of Miranda's throat. Nipping gently, Andrea reached up and pulled Miranda's shirt off and admired the creamy expanse of skin on display after she did. Miranda's silky skin seemed to glow in the moonlight, and Andrea felt like the luckiest girl in the world, being able to love a woman as miraculous and wonderful as Miranda. She reached around the older woman's back and unclasped the bra before pulling it off and dropping on the floor next to them. Massaging the sensitive naked flesh tenderly, Andrea let her other hand roam lower and carefully unbuttoned Miranda's pants. She didn't want to waste any time pulling the designer pants off, so her fingers slipped under Miranda's underwear line, and dove into warmth. Miranda cried out and arched up into Andrea's body. Andrea used her other hand to run through the silvery iconic hair, and leaned in to capture Miranda's slightly parted mouth with her own. Skilled fingers rubbed and gently slid into molten heat with precision.

"Andrea," her name fell from Miranda's lips, and Andrea's heart had never felt so full as it did in that moment.

"I love you so much," she whispered in Miranda's ear and began slowly pumping her fingers in and out.

It was slow, deep, and sensual. Andrea reveled in every single one of Miranda's whimpers, moans, and quietly exhaled 'Andrea's.' Taking an extended pink nipple in her hot mouth, Andrea lathered it with her tongue and Miranda's fingers came up to tangle in her short hair. Still pumping her fingers in and out of her lover, Andrea found the most sensitive, spongy spot in Miranda's warmth, and curled her fingers against it. Miranda's answering gasp alerted Andrea to the fact that she was about to climax. Andrea leaned back up to Miranda's mouth, and pressed her lips against the Editor's before thrusting deeply one last time. Miranda's whole body tensed and froze before her orgasm washed over her and she shuddered and whimpered against Andrea's lips. The brunette's lips curved in a knowing smile and she peppered Miranda's face with kisses until the other woman recovered enough to give her a weak smile. Slowly, not wanting to hurt her love, Andrea withdrew her fingers and licked them, savouring Miranda's unique taste. Bright blue eyes watched her every move and then warm hands pulled her back down to pink lips.

"I love you," Miranda sighed.

"And I love you," Andrea gave one last kiss before rolling off of a half-naked Miranda.

Immediately missing Andrea's warmth, Miranda reached over and said, "Don't you want me to..."

"No," Andrea said, kissing Miranda's wrist. "Tonight was about you and how much you mean to me. Thank you Mira."

Tears once again prickled at Miranda's eyes, and instead of blinking them away, she allowed them to fall. "Thank _you_ Andrea."

Reaching over, she cupped the brunette's face and stroked it gently. Andrea closed her eyes and leaned into the touch. Pressing kisses to Miranda's fingertips, Andrea whispered, "I think it's time for bed Mira."

Looking down at her rumpled slacks and underwear, a flush creeped up Miranda's neck and she quickly tugged them both off, leaving her gloriously naked. Andrea's chocolate eyes admired the toned flesh and she giggled, "Next time, I will get you fully undressed." Miranda shook her head, making her signature white forelock fall in her eyes and Andrea reached up to brush it away. Uncovering vibrant blue eyes, Andrea's heart ached at the tender and somewhat sad look in the crystal depths. Andrea looked down, sinking her teeth in her lower lip and felt Miranda's finger under her chin, gently pushing it back up to look in her eyes. No words were needed. Andrea slowly reached up and pulled her top and her bra off, and then hooked her fingers in her belt loops and pushed them down her long legs. Her underwear came off last, and Miranda pulled her close to finally feel her bare flesh against her own. They sighed in unison at the familiar contact, and Miranda cradled Andrea's head close to her chest.

"Miranda?" Andrea asked.

"Yes darling?"

"I just want you to know how much you mean to me," Andrea's fingertips came up to skim lightly across Miranda's collarbones. "I love you so much, that words cannot express the depth that I care for you. Shh, don't say anything. I have to get this out." Andrea took a deep breath and continued, "Miranda, you're everything to me, and I have to say, without you...I might be-well not here right now. It's because of you that I am fighting this cancer. I was ready to give up and lie in bed until my time came-" Miranda's arms squeezed tightly around her- "until you granted me a second chance, and gave me the strength and courage and a reason to live. So," she took a shuddering breath and smiled against Miranda's sternum, "I just wanted to say thank you for everything. Thank you for loving me."

Miranda was silent for a few moments, but her sniffles alerted Andrea to the fact that she was crying. Looking up, one of Miranda's tears dropped on Andrea's face and started to make its way down her cheek. A pink tongue swiped out to catch it, and Andrea tasted Miranda's sadness.

"My darling Andrea," Miranda breathed and she leaned down to touch her elegant nose against Andrea's, "love is not something to thank me for. I am eternally grateful though, that you have decided to love me as well. Without you, I'm not sure I can go on."

"You must Miranda," Andrea drew in a sharp breath. "For the twins, for Runway, and for the world. If the time comes-"

"Stop Andrea," Miranda shut her eyes. "Don't talk of such things."

"I have to Miranda," Andrea lightly kissed Miranda's eyelids. "If the time comes, I need you to continue with life. I will always be with you, no matter what."

Miranda opened her eyes again and an ocean of tears were swimming in them.

"Promise me Miranda," Andrea gazed in Miranda's eyes. "Promise."

Miranda looked at her and then placed her hand on Andrea's chin. "I promise," she whispered, her breath flitting against Andrea's lips. Then, she tugged and connected her lips with Andrea, trying to reassure herself that the brunette would survive and the chemo would work.

* * *

Andrea Sachs died three months and six days after that emotional night. Her hair was mostly gone, and her body was mostly skin and bones, but she still had the same radiance that emitted ever since she came to Runway. The various administrations of chemo Andrea had received hadn't done much for her cancer, except maybe prolong her death for a couple of weeks. Still, Andrea fought until the end, and wouldn't let her cancer come in between her time with Miranda or the girls. She had her good days, and her bad days, yet rarely did she blow up in anger or cry until her eyes were dry. Andrea considered herself to be lucky since she had such a strong family unit supporting her, and of course, the greatest love of her life was always there to comfort and protect her. The night before she passed, Miranda and her stayed up talking. Soon, Andrea whispered 'I love you' to Miranda, and then fell asleep with her head resting on the older woman's shoulder. Miranda kissed Andrea's forehead, reciprocated the words, and then wrapped her arms around the painfully skinny brunette. In the morning, Miranda immediately knew something was wrong. Sometime in the night, Andrea had moved off of Miranda and had rolled to the other side of the bed. She was facing away from Miranda, and wasn't breathing. Screaming, Miranda had rolled her love over, and started crying when she realized Andrea was gone. Her face, seemingly serene, was devoid of life. Never again would Miranda see her beautiful dark eyes, or hear her name fall from the woman's pouty lips. The twins came running into their mother's bedroom, to find that she was hunched over Andrea's still form, sobbing hysterically. Their eyes immediately became wet, and they cried when they realized that the woman who had become their second mother had passed away. The Priestly women hugged each other tightly, sharing their anguish and grief through their cries and sobs.

In the three months leading up to Andrea's death, Miranda had helped remind Andrea of how much she was loved, and how beautiful she was. Andrea had felt incredibly self-conscious and ugly due to the scarring and bruises she had received from both the chemo and the condition of her easy bruising. She hadn't wanted Miranda to touch her, even though the older woman tried to reassure her that she was safe in Miranda's arms. But, Miranda had been patient and Andrea had finally allowed the older woman to love her. It was one of the most intense, beautiful moments they had shared, and Miranda had thanked the heavens for that first special night. Throughout the months, Miranda had shown Andrea just how precious and cherished she was, and Andrea had reciprocated.

The press hadn't been easy on them. The Dragon Lady had a new cancer-stricken lesbian lover who was the world's newest famous actress. Nothing could have made bigger headlines. So, every day when Miranda went to work, she had to face hundreds of video cameras, journalists, and photographers that all screamed questions at her. Holding her head high, she ignored each and every one of them. Andrea had given a statement concerning her personal health condition as well as her relationship and living condition, which helped ease the press a little bit, but not much. Andrea could barely have Lily over, since the front of the townhouse was swarmed with paparazzi. Her best friend had stumbled in, and they shared a light-hearted chuckle over the press before becoming serious and addressing the reason they were there. It was like Hugh. Andrea didn't know if it would be the last time she saw her friend, so they made the good-byes count. They had met a total of 7 times before their Last Chat, each time a wonderful memory of happiness and laughter.

So when the time came for Andrea's funeral, she had said all of her good-byes to the people she loved and cared about. Emily and Nigel had even come over to the townhouse for a drink (although Andrea had water). The outdoor funeral was well-attended, since the kind brunette had made many friendships during her time with Runway, Les Mis, and the brief period in-between when she worked odd jobs. Miranda's heart was sated a bit when she saw all of the people her sweet Andrea had managed to befriend, and smiled a little when she thought of the ways her love had captured their hearts. However, when the service started, Miranda's smile vanished, and the Ice Queen was slammed firmly into place. She stared straight ahead, tight-lipped, and pale-faced. The funeral made everything seem so real. Andrea was really gone. A sob lodged in her throat, but she firmly swallowed it back down. She would not fall apart in front of utter strangers. She would do it when she was alone, in the privacy of her own bedroom, away from prying eyes. When the touching service was over, she gathered her things, made sure her girls were with her, and climbed in her car and drove away. Many people thought she was a ruthless bitch for not saying anything at Andrea's funeral, or for leaving immediately after the service, but Miranda didn't care. She knew that if she stayed there a second longer, she would have made a fool of herself by falling apart at the seams. Besides, Miranda knew that Andrea would have understood if it had been somebody else's funeral that she had been close to, such as Nigel. She would have left the same way, with not a word exhaled at his service. Miranda went home that day and fell into her bed, inhaling the very faint scent of Andrea still lingering on the sheets. Then, she finally succumbed to her tears, and she sobbed her heart out, wanting to fade away.

But, life goes on, and Miranda needed to pull herself together to do her job and protect Runway. Every day though, she felt a piece of herself die when she remembered that Andrea wasn't there to greet her when she returned home after a long day, or smile her wonderful smile with those beautiful warm chocolate eyes. The only thing that kept her sane was the photos her beloved had taken for her Runway photoshoot, which now seemed like ages ago. Andrea's warm gaze seemed to penetrate her very soul, and the copies Miranda had were getting worn on the edges, due to endless nights tightly clutching the brunette in her arms, trying somehow to bring her back. There were times when Miranda was very close to selfishly ending her own life, but Andrea's voice always stopped her. _If the time comes, I need you to continue with life. _Miranda also had her girls. If she killed herself, they would be traumatized. So to cover her depression and indescribable sadness, Miranda donned the Ice Queen mask wherever she went. The rare times where she allowed it to drop was when she was in the company of Nigel, the girls, and occasionally Emily. Nighttime was the hardest, since there was nothing to distract her. Yet, on those restless nights, Miranda could hear Andrea's soothing voice tell her, _I will always be with you, no matter what. _She had hope that what Andrea said was true. By God, she lived on it.

**Thank you to everybody who has read this. Last chapter will be up soon.**

**Also, to guest who reviewed, I apologize for not putting a warning before you read it! I didn't think about it like that...I'm so sorry. Thank you for bringing that to my attention.**


	12. Chapter 12

**Thank you so much to everybody who has stuck with my story and given me support and love and feedback throughout the chapters. We've come to the end! I loved writing it, even though it was difficult at times. So, last chapter awaits you. :) (Also, not trying to give anything away, but I kind of drew inspiration from the ending of Les Mis, so just mentally prepare yourself for perhaps another character death.)**

**Epilogue**

It was chilly downstairs, but Miranda didn't care. Her head was swimming with emotions and memories, as it often did at that late time of night. Her head pounded with an oncoming migraine, and she had to leave her bedroom to clear it. Her old bones protested as she stumbled down the stairs, but with her famous Priestly determination, she made it down without any pause. Her Christmas tree was lit up, all decorated by Cassidy and her husband, Collin the evening prior. Cassidy had come home a few days ago to spend the holidays with Miranda, and the older woman couldn't remember the last time her heart felt so peaceful. Just watching her daughter and her son-in-law glow with happiness had made her own spirits lift. Miranda took a second to admire the tree before she limped slightly to the kitchen and stopped by one of her windows to notice snow that was lightly falling. Resting her forehead against the cold glass, she welcomed the contrast of temperature to her fevered skin. Her breath made a steam puff fog up the window and her lips tugged up in a small smile when she thought of how Andrea would have loved watching the snow fall. _Andrea_. Her smile faded, and she turned away from the window to pour herself a glass of ice-cold water. Swirling the liquid in her winkled hand, Miranda slowly ambled over to one of the armchairs in her living room. She winced when the arthritis in her knees cracked as she sat down, and closed her eyes and sighed with relief when she felt herself melt into the soft fabric. It was one of the few, simple pleasures she still enjoyed at her old age. Miranda could feel her body shutting down as she aged and try as she might, she didn't care anymore. She felt weak, and even now, she could feel her energy draining just from climbing down the stairs. Miranda finally realized what Andrea had felt all those years ago when she too had been faced with the realization that the tasks that had once been so simple were now the hardest hurdles she had to overcome on a daily basis. Miranda's breathing picked up, and she tried to think of other things to focus on instead of her burning lungs. Her girls.

The twins had grown up into beautiful young women, and attended colleges that made Miranda proud. Cassidy had opted to stay close, studying at the Fashion Institute of Technology to train herself to do what her mother did best, and Caroline had gone to San Francisco to attend Stanford to study law. They had both met charming young men, and gotten married within a month of each other. Miranda had never been so happy to see that her daughters were entering the next stage of their lives, happy and well-protected by their husbands. Her only regret was that Andrea was not there to witness such joyous occasions. Tipping her head back, Miranda's closed eyes filled with unshed tears.

There was no denying it. The past forty-some years had been more than difficult. Miranda had to face each day without her love, and she would be lying if she said that she had grown stronger with each passing day. Truth was, Andrea's death had devastated her. The young woman was Miranda's other half, and, as corny as it might have sounded, her one true love and soulmate. Being without her had made it almost impossible for the Editor to breathe each day. To help try and ease her soul, Miranda had donated graciously to the American Cancer Society, and had even dedicated multiple issues of Runway for cancer-stricken models, writers, and designers. Yet, she went to bed every night with a hole in her heart. She missed everything about Andrea. Her sweet smile, her gorgeous eyes, the way she lit up whenever she saw Miranda, the way her pillow-soft lips would kiss her after work and ask how her day went, the way she always remembered the birthdays of the house staff, her strong points of views on things that had provided hours of intelligent and thought-provoking conversations, the way that Andrea's spirit couldn't be dampened no matter what the situation, the way Andrea had loved her unconditionally...the list was endless. Above all, Miranda missed Andrea's company. She felt old and lonely. Sure, she had Nigel and Emily and Serena and occasionally Donatella to converse with, but they were no substitute for an empty, cold bed at night. She had never once even thought about dating another.

After another eleven years of hard, dedicated work at Runway, she had resigned, giving her position to her young daughter. Cassidy was young, but not as young as Miranda had been when she had taken the position of Editor-in-Chief. She had no doubts that her daughter would impress her, and she was right. Sales had increased, the magazine became fatter, and even Irv Ravitz was gone, having retired shortly after Miranda had. Miranda had helped Cassidy in the beginning, but the young woman had quickly picked it up, and soon was making wise decisions about spreads and photoshoots on her own. Miranda couldn't have been prouder. And Caroline had become a very successful lawyer, graduating in the top 2% of her class. She stayed in San Francisco and had gotten an internship at one of the most elite law firms in the city. Miranda was overjoyed for her other daughter as well. The twins had both worked so hard to get the best possible grades in school, and it was finally paying off. Miranda had also worked hard to not let her depression show in front of her girls, although she sometimes caught them staring at her with concern etched in their faces. She pulled herself together, wanting them to become a close family again, and had succeeded.

A tear slipped out of Miranda's shut eye and she let out a shuddering sigh before brushing it away. She often became reflective late at night, thinking about her life and of course, Andrea.

"Hey Mom," a soft voice broke her thoughts, and Miranda snapped her eyes open.

"Hello Cassidy," she relaxed.

"It's late," Cassidy reached over and took the full glass of water her mother hadn't touched.

"I know," Miranda looked to the side before turning back to Cassidy.

"And it's cold," Cassidy said gently, and grabbed the blanket laying over the back of the couch. She wrapped it around a shivering Miranda, who thanked her quietly.

"Is Collin still sleeping?" Miranda questioned, pulling the blanket tighter around her small frame.

"Yeah," Cassidy said with an affectionate smile on her face. "He sleeps-and snores- like a log during most nights."

"One of the wonderful traits about men," Miranda said dryly, making a small chuckle escape from Cassidy's lips. Changing topics, she asked, "When is your sister coming in again?"

Smiling sadly at how age had impaired her mother's usually impeccable memory, Cassidy sat down in the chair next to Miranda's and grasped her mother's freezing hands in her own, trying to warm them up. "She'll be here tomorrow with Mark."

"Good," Miranda smiled.

"Let's get you up to bed," Cassidy urged gently, offering a hand to Miranda.

As much as she didn't want to go back up and face her empty bed, she allowed her daughter to lead her back up the long flights of stairs and into her bedroom. Cassidy helped ease her down on the bed, and then kissed her goodnight and left the room. As Miranda laid on her back, staring at the ceiling, she thought about what Andrea would say if she knew that the older woman had been drowning in her grief and misery the last 40 years. Andrea would probably be heartbroken to find that her lover had been struggling with her depression and sorrow for so long. Her headache returned.

"I miss you so much Andrea," Miranda whispered and closed her eyes.

* * *

The next day, Cassidy and Collin left to pick up Caroline and her husband at the airport and Miranda was left by herself. Skimming the surface of her books, she closed her eyes and picked one at random. Surprisingly, when she looked at it, a familiar girl with long wispy hair pushed a huge mop in her small child-like hands, and her large eyes seemed to stare back at her from the cover. Miranda's heart dropped and she rested the book back on the shelf, intent on pushing it back to its place between the other books before hesitating and pulling it back out again. She hobbled over to her favorite armchair and sunk into the seat before opening the book and reading. Soon though, her eyes became slightly hazy and painful from the strain of reading, and her head started to hurt. Angry at the ever-present deterioration of her aging body, Miranda put her famous determination to use and skipped to the part that had convinced her to read it in the first place.

_Jean Valjean took Fantine's head in both his hands, and arranged it on the pillow as a mother might have done for her child; then he tied the string of her chemise, and smoothed her hair back under her cap. That done, he closed her eyes._

_ Fantine's face seemed strangely illuminated at that moment._

_ Death, that signifies entrance into the great light._

Sighing, Miranda closed the book with one hand and tipped her head back. Death that signifies entrance into the great light. She snorted at the words, finding that they angered her. Miranda tried to raise her left arm to rub at her tired eyes when she realized that she physically couldn't. She didn't feel too startled though, since it had probably fallen asleep from her time reading, and tried to raise it again to no avail. Frightened, she looked down at her limp arm and focused all of her energy to lift it again and panicking when it wouldn't.

"What the..." she muttered.

She cautiously poked at her left arm with her right pointer finger and panicked even more when she couldn't feel the harsh jab. The 93-year old woman stood up quickly, and promptly fell back on her butt when the room started spinning. She squeezed her blue eyes tightly and focused on not passing out. Her headache pounded insistently in her forehead and she could hear the front door opening and closing with echoes of laughter floating into the living room. Miranda opened her mouth, intent on alerting her children about her...condition, before blackness slowly creeped along the peripherals of her sight, and she finally succumbed to it. Her snowy white hair fell back and her head slumped to the side, her mouth still open.

* * *

"Miranda," a soft voice called through her dark abyss. "Miranda, sweetheart, it's time to wake up now."

With a lot of effort, she managed to peel open her eyes, only to immediately recoil when a harsh, bright light hit her retinas. She snapped them shut again, taking comfort in the darkness.

"Come on Miranda, that's it. Just a little bit more darling," the calming voice continued. "You're so close to coming back home to me."

Miranda timidly cracked her lids open again, and it took a minute for her to adjust. When her eyes finally could see again, all she saw was white. She pushed herself up from her laid-down position, and looked around. There was nothing in sight-something that both relaxed and frightened her. Miranda looked down at herself, and sighed when she saw her shrunken, elderly body.

"Hello?" she timidly called out before she pulled herself together. The Miranda Priestly she knew wouldn't have shown any fear against the unknown. "Who's there?"

"Sweetheart, you can't see me because you are caught between life and death."

"A-Andrea?" Miranda gasped, and spun around in hopes of catching a sight of the beautiful brunette.

"You can't see me because somehow, you've been given a choice," Andrea's voice repeated gently. "A choice whether to stay on earth and live to see the next chapters of your girls' journeys, or a choice to come with me to the next life."

"What?" Miranda gasped. How could she choose between being there for her girls or selfishly leaving them? Andrea was silent, knowing that it would be wrong to alter Miranda's choice in any way. "Um, I-I don't know," Miranda said after a long pause and hung her head in shame.

She felt like the worst mother ever, but what was left for her? She had lived a good life. She had left Runway in good hands. She had seen her beautiful daughters get married to wonderful men, and she had the glorious opportunity to watch them grow and mature under her nurturing care. Most importantly though, she knew that they knew that she loved them more than life itself.

Andrea's sweet voice caressed Miranda's ears, somehow knowing exactly what to tell her. "You passed by an extremely large stroke. The symptoms came fast, and the oxygen leading to your brain was quickly cut off. Your body couldn't handle the pressure of losing the blood cells in your brain, so it shut down. At your age, it would have been almost impossible to survive such a large stroke." she paused to allow Miranda to fully absorb everything.

"So it was my time to go," Miranda mused and her hand came up to run through her hair.

"Perhaps," was all Andrea replied with.

"Well, I probably would have died sooner or later," she said quietly.

"I can show you them if you would like," Andrea offered softly, knowing that seeing her girls one last time was what Miranda needed to make her decision.

"Y-yes please do," Miranda's frail body shook. Whether from fear, worry, tension, or love, she didn't know.

There was no response, but the emptiness surrounding her began to recede, leaving her standing in her own living room. She gasped when she saw her dead body slumped over in the chair, and tentatively reached her fingertips out to touch herself. Deep wrinkles lined the face of the woman in the chair, and Miranda couldn't help but feel disgusted at how old she looked. A sob broke her thoughts, and she turned to see Cassidy holding the Dead Miranda's hand, crying at her side with Collin silently offering her support by resting his hand in the middle of her back. Caroline was clutching her other hand and also pouring her grief and sorrow into it. Miranda's heart ached at the sight.

"She's probably up in heaven with Andy," Cassidy sniffled and a weak smile appeared on her lips.

"She probably is," Caroline agreed, silent tears streaking down her face. She reached over and clutched her sister's hand tightly.

They were silent, drawing comfort from their hands connected with each other's, and with their mother's. Miranda stepped behind them and stroked their hair, sadly knowing that they couldn't feel it. She hoped that they could feel her presence, even if they couldn't feel her physical touch.

"My Bobbyseys," the affectionate nickname from their childhood slipped out, and Miranda smiled at the warmth and familiarity the name brought.

"I love you so much Mom," Cassidy whispered and pressed a kiss to Dead Miranda's palm.

"I love you too Mom," Caroline murmured, copying Cassidy's actions and pressing her lips to Miranda's other palm. "More than words can express."

"I love you two so much too," Miranda said with tears in her eyes. "I'm so proud of you both."

Finally, it was clear to her what her choice should be. It was her time to go. She could feel it. It wasn't just because she could see Andrea again-her whole being knew that her time on Earth had passed. She had left a legacy behind. She had touched souls through Runway, guided her daughters through life's hard courses, and fell in the most passionate, deepest love she had ever experienced. While many biographies might be written about the great Miranda Priestly and her accomplishments, struggles, and relationships, nobody could write about her personal life that happened behind the closed doors. Only her family and closest friends had the right to know that side of her. Miranda allowed a true, genuine smile to grace her face. Finally, she felt at peace.

She took one last look at her family crowded around her body, and took some comfort in the fact that she had people who loved her, and would mourn her. Turning away, Miranda began walking out of her living room. She somehow wandered into her kitchen, and paused when she saw the snow still falling outside the window. Miranda made her way to the closed door, and walked straight through it. Pausing when she reached the middle of her yard, she rested her hand on the single tree that resided there, and let out a genuine laugh. She was finally free.

"Miranda?" That voice again made the older woman melt inside.

Slowly, she turned around and was faced with the most beautiful sight in the world. Her Andrea, no longer sickly-looking, was standing in the middle of snow flurries with her signature smile on her face. Miranda's breath caught in her throat when she saw that wonderful smile being directed at her again. "Andrea," she breathed reverently. The younger woman had her long, chocolate locks back, and her pale skin shone with a healthy glow. She was wearing the gorgeous Prabal Gurung gown she wore to the Oscars, yet she was not shivering in the winter air.

Andrea's dark eyes, so full of love, hungrily stared in Miranda's crystal blue ones before she started to walk closer. Miranda felt rooted in place. It felt like a ghost was walking to her. After what seemed like an eternity, Andrea finally stood close enough to her that if she even twitched her hand that was resting limply by her side, she would touch the beautiful brunette. She stared deep into chocolate pools, not daring to breath, for fear that she might break the wonderful spell she was under. Andrea was really with her again. In person.

"Oh Andrea," Miranda cried, putting all of her pent-up despair, grief, and love into the name before launching herself in Andrea's arms.

Strong arms caught her, and wound themselves tightly around her back, providing physical proof that the brunette was really there with her. After 40 plus years of not feeling the beautiful woman's arms around her, Miranda's eyes leaked with tears as she rested her head on Andrea's strong shoulder. She buried her face in Andrea's neck, as if she was trying to bury herself in Andrea's body. Dark brown hair tumbled down around Miranda's face, shielding her and enveloping her in Andrea's delicious scent and solidifying her very presence. Somehow, she could feel the younger woman's embrace, and it helped validate the fact that it wasn't just a hallucination or a crazy dream. The warm arms encircled her even further, pulling her closer to Andrea's body, and closer to home. A gentle pressure on the back of her head startled her before she realized that it was just the other woman's hand holding her close, much like a mother would do to her child. Slender fingers tangled in Miranda's hair, making the older woman shiver at how exquisite the feeling was.

"My dear sweet Miranda," Andrea breathed, tears streaming down her own face.

She kissed the smooth skin on Miranda's cheek before resting her head on top of the soft hair and holding the older woman tightly, savoring the feeling of having her love in her arms again. Gently, she started rocking them back and forth, hoping to calm Miranda's gulping hiccups down.

"Shh," she murmured in Miranda's ear. "You're safe. I'm here Mira."

"I missed you so much," Miranda whimpered into Andrea's soft neck.

"As I missed you," Andrea said sadly, gently stroking the soft white hair as she spoke. "I saw how it was killing you after I left. I wanted so badly to return, but of course, that wasn't possible. So I stayed and watched you spend endless nights by yourself, crying. It shattered me, seeing you in so much pain. As you know, the dead can't touch the living, so even though my hand rested on top of yours throughout all of your grief, you could not feel me. I stayed with you every day and every night, hoping against hope that somehow you would be able to sense me, or somehow find happiness with another person again." She cut off with a gasp when Miranda tightened her arms painfully.

"No," the older woman whispered, her lips brushing against the smooth skin of Andrea's neck as she spoke. "No, there could never be somebody else. There was only you."

"But I wanted you to be happy," Andrea dropped her fingers from Miranda's hair and started running her hands up and down Miranda's back soothingly.

Miranda's own hands were locked around Andrea's waist, holding tight, fearing that if she let go, the brunette would leave again and never come back. "I could never be happy without you."

Andrea sighed and then gently nudged Miranda's forehead up with her own. Staring deep into watery blue pools, Andrea slowly leaned in and kissed her. Their lips instantly recognized each other, and started moving in sync. When Andrea soft tongue swiped at Miranda's bottom lip, she suddenly jerked away, but remained in the brunette's loving embrace.

"Andrea, you do realize you're kissing an old woman, right?" Miranda was appalled that Andrea still found her attractive at 93 years old.

"Darling, when you had the realization that you were free, you changed back into the age you unconsciously loved the most. Your 50-some-year-old self, which I assume means that you chose it because it was the age you met me," Andrea giggled and rubbed her nose against Miranda's.

The older woman gasped and looked down at her body. She was wearing one of her favorite outfits-a creamy white wrap-around blouse with a matching chemise underneath, and a simple black pencil skirt. Oddly, her signature 4-inch heels and hosiery were missing, and she was both barelegged and barefoot. Not that she minded of course...it felt rather liberating not to wear them.

Andrea leaned in and her cool breath flitted against pink lips. "Although, I saw you when you were an old lady, and must say, you aged well."

Miranda chuckled and rested her forehead against Andrea's. "Honestly Andrea." She slung her arms lower across her love's back and then bit her lip. "You're right by the way."

"About what?" Andrea's arms also slid lower.

"My favorite age period _is_ my 50s because it _was_ when I first met you," Miranda smiled and Andrea leaned in to kiss her lips again. "And, you were right about another thing."

"And what's that?" Andrea grinned against Miranda's lips.

"You really were always with me," Miranda said, her voice sounding slightly vulnerable.

Andrea tilted her head up and gave her a breath-taking smile. Her dark eyes held so much love and expression when she replied tenderly, "Of course I was. I love you Miranda."

"I love you too," Miranda almost sobbed again. "So so much."

"Hey now," Andrea gently wiped some errant tears away from the silver-haired woman's face. "No more crying. We are together, and that's what matters."

Miranda smiled blissfully at her, and then tilted her head to the side and noticed the snow again.

"It's beautiful," Miranda said.

"I love it," Andrea squeezed her arms gently around Miranda's slender frame.

"I knew you would," Miranda grinned.

They fell in silence for a while, just enjoying the peace and comfort their souls felt at being reconnected. Their foreheads were resting against each other, and their closed lashes cast long shadows on their cheeks.

"Andrea?" Miranda said quietly.

"Yes Miranda?" Andrea replied just as softly.

"What's next?" she bit her lip at the childish question.

"You mean for our future?" Andrea lifted her head and brushed her lips against Miranda's forehead.

"Yes."

"Who knows?" Andrea grinned and shrugged adorably. "I suppose another life. As long as we're together, then everything will turn out fine."

As corny as it sounded, Miranda felt a sense of reassurance with Andrea's words.

"All right then," she exhaled and finally leaned back, the farthest amount of space she had put between them since they had embraced.

"All right," Andrea echoed with a smile.

She held both of Miranda's hands in her own, and leaned in to kiss her again. Their lips brushed each others softly before the kiss deepened, and their tongues came in play. Miranda wrapped her arms around the taller brunette's neck, tangling her hair in the brunette locks she had missed so much, and Andrea cupped her face in her hands. Andrea sighed blissfully into Miranda's mouth when she tasted the sweet flavor of her love. Oh, how she had missed Miranda. Without realizing it, Andrea somehow had Miranda backed up against the tree. Flushed, they both pulled back before it become any more passionate, eyes sparkling and their hearts lighter than ever. Andrea rested her hands on Miranda's slim waist and touched her forehead to her love's before erupting into hushed giggles. Heart full from hearing that lovely sound come out of her Andrea, Miranda ran her hands down soft bare arms and rested her hands on top of the brunette's. Then, with a small smirk on Miranda's face, she tangled her fingers with Andrea's, and spun them around so the younger woman was pushed against the tree with her arms hanging above her head. Andrea's eyes sparkled, and Miranda let out her own beautiful laugh. She leaned in to kiss those plump lips again, and then leaned back with a contented sigh. Loosing her grip on Andrea's hands, she allowed the other woman to lower her arms and tightly grasp her fingers.

"I love you my Mira," Andrea smiled and reached up to cup Miranda's cheek affectionately as her other hand drifted down to a slim waist. Blue eyes closed and cherished the contact. "You were-and still are-everything to me. Mira, you were with me during my darkest hour, and took care of me, no matter how hard it was for you. Words cannot express how much your love means to me. I love you so much. Always have, and always will."

"I love you too Andrea," Miranda returned the smile and pressed her soft lips to Andrea's warm palm. "Never has a day gone by where I haven't thought about you, and wished more than anything else that you would be back by my side. I've missed you so much, but now, standing here with you holding me, my soul is finally complete again."

They kissed again, slowly this time, and then Miranda tugged Andrea away from the tree. Their hands found each others quickly, and held on tightly as if they would be lost without the contact. Then, with loving smiles directed at each other, they both started walking, not caring where they went as the snow around them fell heavier and heavier until they disappeared in a sea of white.


End file.
